I'm talking about the dumbest topics, replies, signatures, avatars, nicknames etc. People trying to diss you in broken Somali. Now that's funny. My bloopers are as follows: Daanyeer nick Wanting people to party on my grave- signature (what would Freud make out of this) Posted an audio which turned out to be X-rated talk (should have listened a little longer) and I bet countless replies that didn't make no damn sense What were yours? Talking about other people's bloopers is morally wrong but positively welcomed in this thread. Quotes of a nomad oo wareersan in action are encouraged. So please commit Qarxis!

Last saturday was the Somalia-Somaliland Day which I attended. It was the bomb, hundreds of people came and I didn't expect Somalis to be able to organise such a big event in The Hague. There was even children day care and professional security. It was organized by the org Nedsom. They work in Somaliland and Puntland/Somalia and the chairman is from Puntland/Somalia Gulled Yusuf and the vice-chairman from Somaliland Ismail Awil. Heard later on through the Somali Waxaa-La-Yiri machine that the chairman is the owner of the Horseednet newswebsite and that his father is police chief in Puntland. The blessed couple got 140 000 euros for the whole event by the Dutch government or something. Remember! Waa sida laygu yiri! The ladies were exaggeratingly beautiful masha Allah, we couldn't believe so many pretty girls at one place at the same time. I did not spot one ugly heifer. A Somali painter showed us his artwork. Paintings of rural Somalia. He ended his presentation with a Somali poem which reminds me my promise to Baashi. :eek: The debates were heated as usual with Somali people. Dutchies trying to say something, but there was always a Somali interrupting the poor soul. Some Somalis got emotional, some got mad, some said things they shouldn't have said. Pretty much Somali discussion as usual. I wanted to say something, but the Nedsom chairman Gulled claimed the mic all for himself and I didn't want to walk to another mic. The Somali fashion show was cool. 4 dudes and 5 ladies with each wearing traditional Somali clothes from different eras and regions of the Somali people. The presentation about the drought in Northeasten Kenya and South Somalia was interesting and touching. One man had to cry and I suspect it was a smart strategy to woe the ladies. The food was nasty as hell. I wanted the bariis, but by the time I went to the girls to get my food, there was only lasagne. After two bites and it was enough! But good thing I didn't eat the bariis, everybody I know who ate the bariis were spending the whole sunday in the toilet. I'm dead serious. Than the winner of the Idea-contest were being announced. Somali youth between 15 and 30 had to write about their ideas how to rebuild the country. Number 3 was a girl who had ideas about exchanging knowledge or something. Number 2 was a dude who came up with a Somali National Fund but he didn't even bother to show up. And I know the number 1 and he was a young, intelligent Somali guy who came up with some complicated shit. The jury was amazed with his ideas and how brilliant he was. The day ended with a small party with Somali music. My two cents on Somalia-Somaliland Day. I'm definitely coming back next year.

LOOOOOOOOOOL @ Garow.

^ Yeah great chickfight soo ma ahan. Great stuff.

The revelation vid is worth less than used toiletpaper. Blane didn't do the trick like this. I think Blane really has magical powers.

^Tru, kinda like jumping out the window knowing you'll crash to death to get away from a fire. You just wanna get out.

I made lasagne once for 6 people. Let's just say it was awfully quiet during dinner.

Good one. I would tear his azz apart. But easy on the link man. I saw some stuff I rather did not see man. Warn people not to scroll down to far.

Originally posted by rokko: Mate - means a friend but anyone can be a mate.. its like the words pal or buddy.. but more elegant :cool: Tru, mate is like the gay version of pal or buddy. Mate = buttbuddy.

^There are worse scenarios. I know a girl who goes by the name Billy instead of Bilan, because Bilan is pronounced the same way as Billen, meaning buttcheecks in Dutch. Worse with the name Muna. It means penis in Finnish.

Farah Blue, tuug waxid. I give back even 5 pence. Futadaa uu sheeg. They made a mistake and they better deal with the consequences.

B2B telemarketing. My job was to convince companies to let us review their insurance plan or some shidh like that. I didn't even understand it myself and I was expected to explain companies something I don't understand myself. I told them to kiss my azz the first week. This much stress was just unacceptable for me. I worked as a Cashier for a few months in a bank and I remember overpaying a lady by £900 and the bank had to investigate as was policy. Thankfully the Arab lady came back a week later saying I overpaid her by £900 and she couldn't come in any earlier. Phew. You are lucky! Had that been me, I swear that you would have never ever seen that money again.

War meeye Aasiya, Baarliin, Yurub iyo wixii la mid ah? Gabdhihii intarnashanaalka ahaa.

Miskiin-Macruuf-Aqiyaar. Let's hope that the joint task force of the US and Dutch navies in the Somali waters extend their patrol to these activities next to piracy. Waa haddii qiimaha nolosha masaakiintaan ay uu la siman tahay gaaladii awalba baddaheena joogeen si ay kheyraadkeena naga boobaan. The brutality of the smugglers is mindblowing: One of the more horrible tales emerged this year, when more than 100 people died at sea after the crew forced them out of the boat midjourney. A 10-year-old boy named Badesa was kept aboard to clean the ship on its return to Boosaaso. He is recovering from starvation and shock in the hospital. His abductors remain at large. If the seas get too rough, some passengers might be hurled overboard to lighten the load. If someone dares to stand up during the voyage, a whack with a stick or a gun butt is the inevitable punishment. Unaccompanied women might find themselves sexually molested by the crew in the dark.

Ciyaal iskaabulo, waraa bariiskiina raadsada aan idin dhahay hadii aa bajaq meesha ka heleesiina for extra then holla at her!! LOOOL

At my cousin's wedding, her brother took care of the security at the aroos in the Mercure Hotel by forming a group of guys (incl me) to keep an eye on unknown and suspicious looking people. If you're uninvited its Ok, you're always welcome. But guys who are harassing the girls at the aroos or pushing other guests away when pieces of cake or other food is being offered is unacceptable. The hotel has its own security, but it looks better when the bride's family are taking control ma garatay. That looks good. Uninvited ladies stealing the show were also at risk to be thrown out. You know what I'm talking about!

Found this sad story on Google News. Thought I'd share it with you all. To many innocent people are dying man. There is a silent massacre going on - 1000 reported deaths since last september! Somalis Brave a Sea of Perils for Jobs Abroad Evelyn Hockstein for The New York Times Farhia Ahmed Muhammad, 17, was among 95 boat passengers forced by smugglers to jump overboard during a voyage from Somalia to Yemen. By MARC LACEY Published: May 29, 2006 BOOSAASO, Somalia, May 24 — Luckily, Farhia Ahmed Muhammad knew how to swim. As the rickety fishing boat Ms. Muhammad and 94 other desperate souls took out of Somalia last fall approached the Yemeni coast, the smugglers forced them all overboard into the surging, shark-infested sea. They dared not resist. The smugglers had already shot two men simply because they had begged for water. "There was no request," said Ms. Muhammad, 17. "They just threw us in." It is not at all difficult to understand why people want out of Somalia, with its brutal clan warfare, its life-sapping drought and its dire poverty. In recent weeks, a surge in fighting between Islamists and Somali warlords has left hundreds dead and many more injured in Mogadishu, Somalia's crowded capital, spurring an even greater exodus. But getting out by sea to Yemen, an illegal gateway to jobs in the Middle East, carries risks that rival those on shore. At best, the journey across the Gulf of Aden takes two nights, if the tides are right, the boat engine does not fail and the Yemeni Coast Guard does not intercept the vessel. But it can take a week or more if something goes wrong, or the trip can be aborted halfway through, with the smugglers deciding for whatever reason to hurl the migrants over the side. "We know there are two possibilities: life or death," said Abdi Kareem Muhammad Mahmoud, 21, who fled Mogadishu last week with a bullet wound in his foot and came to the Somali seaside in hopes of reaching Yemen. "We heard we might make it or we might be thrown over and die. I still want to try. After all the danger I've been through, what is some more?" The danger for residents of Mogadishu is huge. Militias linked to the capital's notorious warlords — who, according to a variety of Africa analysts, have been paid by American intelligence agents to track down and capture members of Al Qaeda — have been facing off in recent weeks and months against gunmen hired by Islamist leaders trying to assert control over the anarchic city. The recent violence in the capital is the worst since Somalia's last central government fell 15 years ago, and of the hundreds who have died most have been civilians caught in the cross-fire. But the death toll at sea has been even higher. About 1,000 people have died since September, trying to make the trek from Somalia's northern coast across the sea to Yemen. And that is just an estimate, since nobody really knows how many boats, all of them grossly overloaded, attempt the trek from the shores of the remote Puntland region in northeastern Somalia. The only way to gauge the horrors is to count the bodies as they wash up on shore and listen to the awful tales recounted by survivors. After being forced into the sea, Ms. Muhammad was so sapped of strength she barely got to shore in Yemen, where she stayed briefly before returning to Somalia. Miraculously, everyone else on her boat managed to survive as well, including the six young children aboard. The Somali smugglers are a ruthless lot. They charge $30 to $100 for passage, quite a bit since they pack 80 to 200 bodies into the fishing boats. And payment does not guarantee safe passage, not by a long shot. If the seas get too rough, some passengers might be hurled overboard to lighten the load. If someone dares to stand up during the voyage, a whack with a stick or a gun butt is the inevitable punishment. Unaccompanied women might find themselves sexually molested by the crew in the dark. But it is when the Yemeni Coast Guard appears and the boat owner risks losing his craft that things get even worse. The crew is likely to force all the passengers into the sea at gunpoint. If anyone hesitates, the crew will sometimes tie the hands of the passengers and throw them out, or simply shoot them. "This is as bad as it gets," said Dennis McNamara, the United Nations special adviser for displaced people, who visited Boosaaso this week to urge the local authorities to crack down on what he called one of the world's worst and most overlooked illegal transit routes. The Somali migrants make their way across harsh terrain to Boosaaso, a ramshackle port town. There, they are joined by Ethiopian refugees, who flee political persecution or set off in search a better life in the Persian Gulf states. Those migrants, with others from as far south as Zambia, gather in hovels here by the sea, where they try to raise the money to make the journey. Many had the fare but were robbed along the way. Work is scarce in Boosaaso, so raising enough money may take years and years of labor. "These are the poorest of the poor," said Mr. McNamara, who toured their wooden shacks, which lack running water and toilets and are packed together so tightly that fires regularly rage through the slums, forcing everyone to begin again. If they do raise the money, the migrants seek out a dealer, who whispers to them the location of a gathering spot on the outskirts of the city. As a group, the migrants head for a remote section of beach, where they are loaded aboard vessels under cover of darkness. "It's so dangerous, and there's a real risk of being thrown in the sea," said Batsieva Zerihum of the International Organization of Migration, who counsels the Ethiopian migrants gathered in Boosaaso to abandon their journey and head home. "I talk to them, but everybody wants to try it. There are people who have tried four times and are trying it again." The first time Asho Ali Baree, 34, made the trip, the boat developed engine trouble, and the captain told the passengers to pray. They did, and the boat somehow managed to find its way back to Somalia. She was given another trip across, which made her luckier than another boatload of passengers who set off one night, only to be dropped down the Somali coast four days later and told that they had made it to Yemen. "I was so mad," said Adisu Sisai, 18, an Ethiopian, who lost $50 but has begun trying to earn enough to try again. One of the more horrible tales emerged this year, when more than 100 people died at sea after the crew forced them out of the boat midjourney. A 10-year-old boy named Badesa was kept aboard to clean the ship on its return to Boosaaso. He is recovering from starvation and shock in the hospital. His abductors remain at large. It is an open secret that powerful people in Puntland, including some with links to top politicians, own many of the boats engaged in the trafficking, but they do not seem to be pursued by the authorities. Somalis who reach Yemen are entitled to benefits at a refugee camp there. But that is nobody's goal. The point is to get a highly paid job, anything above $50 a month in this part of the world, and for that they risk their lives. Many find themselves deported, often to a landing strip outside Mogadishu, far from the villages where they began their treks. Another danger lingers along the Somali coast. The police, though largely ineffectual in stopping the smuggling, sometimes arrest the migrants, though the legal basis for doing so remains unclear. On a recent day, the police chief, Col. Muhammad Rashid Jama, paraded three men and one woman onto the grounds of the police station. All confessed that they had tried to get to Yemen. One man, Abdi Ahmed Muhammad, 28, had a bandage on the side of his head, where he said a smuggler had bashed him with a rifle butt. The smuggler had taken his money but then refused to allow him onto the departing boat, he said. The woman, Amal Hussein Ali, 37, said she had left seven children in Mogadishu as she went in search of a job in Yemen to support them. A widow, she faced up to three years in jail, the police said. "Anyone who has a heart will feel pity for her," Colonel Jama said. "I'm like that. But she became a criminal, and I am a Puntland officer safeguarding the Constitution." When United Nations officials protested to the Puntland authorities about the detention of the migrants instead of the smugglers, officials altered their account. The detained people, including Ms. Ali, were smugglers, they said. Crackdowns have put some boats out of commission. But officials say they are hampered by the fact that no explicit local law prohibits trafficking. So the flow continues, fueled by desperation mixed with greed. Mr. Mahmoud, nursing his wounded foot and haunted by so many years of living a nightmare, said he felt drawn to another, quieter place across the sea. "When I look at the sea, in my mind, I think about going away from all this," he said. "I just hope I make it." A camp for migrants in Boosaaso, Somalia. Many hope to escape Somalia's brutal clan warfare, sapping drought, and brutal poverty by sailing to Yemen. Fishing boats on the Gulf of Aden, the rough and shark-infested sea that Somalis must cross to reach Yemen. The smugglers are a ruthless lot. If the seas get too rough, some passengers might be hurled into the shark-infested waters to lighten the load. Farhia Ahmed Muhammad, 17, was among 95 boat passengers forced overboard by smugglers. Many migrants work on the docks in Boosaaso to pay smugglers for a place on a boat. The death toll at sea has been higher than the toll from violence in Mogadishu. About 1,000 people have died since September on the trek to Yemen. .

^Ameen.

Originally posted by Faaraxov: quote:I know its an unusual request. But I died dude, can't I just have this one? I want girls shaking their azz on my grave. It means the world to me. Errr,it means the world?,i will let you edit that sh12t nigga Than why the hell did you quote it Ruushkaad tahay cune.

LOL J.Lee khatar baad tahay walee. You knew it was from the Life Goes On lyrics. To the Russian: I.The shroud[Karfan,duh] has no pockets...so place the kitaab on your chest? My mother will make one with pockets for me. She knows her baby wanted it this way. II.No music in a funeral[unless you are a Dinka,that would prolly explain the Blue skin ] I know its an unusual request. But I died dude, can't I just have this one? I want girls shaking their azz on my grave. It means the world to me. III.You have no choice when you wanna die,so you cant just smile and die when you wish to I know and I took care of that. I'll prolly die screaming like a bitj. But my cousins will put a smile on my face with ducktape and shidh.

art, you need to learn your language breh. You're not a child anymore. Soo baro afkaaga hooyo ninyahow and get your shidh together. War sidaan isu dhaan ninyow. Start by learning the BTJ alphabet for goodness sakes.

^ That's definitely an option when I retire or something - a game farm in Zambia. A nice, colonial style house surrounded by a large piece of untamed land with your own wild animals. Breeding lions or rhinoes or something. Yeah I'm feeling it.

Phoenix, Arizona. Well-paying jobs, low cost of living, nice weather, nature similar to Somalia's, close to California where a lot of my relatives live and a sizable Somali community to observe every step I make. I'm going to migrate there after graduation IA. After the Phoenix chapter in my life -> Dubai and Somalia? IA.

I discovered something else. Something nobody knows. If you look at the black plus in the middle, the pink dots will disappear right. When they disappear, replace your focus on the black plus on to somewhere else. You will suddenly see a circle of green dots. Borfasoor Faarax Buluug

Any girl who has a video of her gettin her boom boom groove on can send the video directly to me - Remember Farah Blue, niiko is for private consumption not for YouTube. Of course while I am still in trance I will send an application for marraige and her weight of Gold! Now beat That Farah!! Hahaha. War you're even crazier than I am. You're right, the videos need to be sent to us directly. To girls who are all lafo and no dabo: do not send anything! Our selection process will only welcome those girls who can at least squeeze 4 or 5 kids out of that thang. , you know what waterlily, it really is considering some of these guys comments. is it really that enticing? . shidh No Vibe, we enjoy the art. We are very cultural biibol. Nonetheless, I agree that it should be done without the prying eye of non-related opposite sex. LaVie, they are the target market. Ok I have this feeling that we are distant cousins. So can you give me a quick lapdance, I mean niiko dance?