Ignore this.. and the previous two all mistakes LOL

I really need to learn how to delete things properly.

Xaasidad! Only 10 for me? Your Betrayal shall be well documented for future notice. Ps What? You not a fan of "Qamriga?" lol I thought it was pronouced Khamriga? (You need that Arabi Kha- khaa (nearly chokes on her own flem and stops)

Today I'm going to bed early insha'allah as I was tired all day because I was up last night watching this documentary about Transexuals entering a beauty pagent. Very strange yet etertaining, kinda like car-crash television I was disgusted yet jealous at the way these chicks with dicks looked after themselves. Don't even get me started on how excellent their make-up was.

Paragon, you know I’d applaud you had your come back not reeked of desperation, I mean fish and chips girl? Come on now that was low even for you- I mean since when did you become a presumptuous git? Think you that I am unable to read Somali (which is basically English) and then dare to insult my intelligence by providing one of the crappiest translations I’ve ever heard/read? LOL So typical of a white girl (I presume) to flower up the nonsensical meaningless ramblings of an egotistical boaster. And you? Shame on you for trying to pass an old Somali song as something ethereal and otherworldly. On a scale of 1-10 how pretentious did you think you came across I wonder? Oh how the mighty hath fallen… Ps As soon as I read the first line I knew your ruse was up! LOL Seriously where have I heard that song from though? Like a distant memory that first line in particular lingers in my mind but I just can’t place it. Ahh well…senility does come in doses. Either way-next time try to take your head out of you buttocks before you speak, the muffling sounds you’re making really are quite disconcerting. (Grins and unabashedly smacks him over the head) Now down to business…. Shakina –LOL- Hey old people have their moments plus I wouldn’t speak too soon about Paragons youthly virtues if I were you, he reminds me of this 78 year old man who sits by the station where I live, we call him Mr Bus-Stop Bond because every morning he puts on the same old –piss stained tuxedo as if he were 007 himself and proceeds to serenade ladies passing by while managing to also continuously bang his head against the wall of the Bus shelter. He’s quite the ladies man you know-much like our Paragon I’m sure. Ps so you like a bit of fire in your men eh? Hmm…duly noted, infact it doesn’t sound too bad once I phrase it like that. LOL Chocolate-honey-LOL Fair enough I suppose- but are you truly saying you’d rather have sparkling conversation instead of sexy obedience? I'm shocked by you.... lol Cynical lady- I was referring to men who are opinionated in general whether they have intelligent things to say or silly things. Just men who don’t generally cower in your presence or at least pretend not to. So what’s your answer now? Still open to having to them speak? Lieutenant Mr Adeyg- I like your honesty if not your cave-man style- but I’m afraid that such Neolithic tactics will only resort with you receiving a rock between the legs causing you to forever piss through a hole in your stomach. Tread carefully my fellow cave brethren -us mildness, controlling, almost animalistic buffoons are a dying breed, if only you’d sit back and let me be he-man to your skeletor we’d make quite a team. But alas there’s only room enough for one cave man on top and that’s me. (Bangs her hairy chest and tries not to giggle at all the filthy double-meanings that’s unintentionally found their way to my head)

Paragon- For a sensitive usually meek sissy boy you sure are being provoccative today, what did you have for breakfast this morning? Cialis? (Google it) Goodir- You Try'na fataal me for your buddy?

Threatened much? You know It would be very easy for me to say "make me" but I shall revert from being predictable and instead will preceed to keep you quiet by duck taping your lips together.

^-LOL!- Charming as always I knew there was a reason I initially liked you. Still, sit on this (stick out her middle finger) lol Adamn (Giggles back at hime and pokes him in the belly) Shakina- LOL All very fair points indeed and a very red blooded passionate woman you are indeed but are you really saying that a biddible tight lipped man would not interest you in the least? I mean whats wrong with a sexy mute who obeys your every command? Ps can you really picture me kissing a mans feet? LOL Come on...I wouldn't know how to -even if I wished it on a kinky level- which I don't. Oh and I'm never anti-religious, simply anti-certain ideas people exhibit. Malika- as usual some very good points but dont you see? If you allow a man to express any form of opinion then next he'll turn around and dare to question the way in which you treat him and form his own husbands for justice league. We cannot allow such a thing to occur dee, suffocate him with the leash do not give him room to breath (Sorry I was reading a dog manuel for a second-still same principles apply) Geel_Jire- LOL Is that so? Well though I can't see it happening we'll all have to wait to see the consequences post marraige. Faheema- Strong and opinionated- Well noted. Rudy- Diiriye- Waan qooq-daafay saxeeb now why don't you for once discuss something other than my vagina- a topic you always seem to be far too preoccupied with. Are you trying to tell me something? (Lifts a brow) Marx- you may have a point also but does not having an opinion or not being forward enough to express one mean that someone cannot have a personality? Besides....who needs a personality in a man, if the attitude is right and all the right parts are functioning then why be greedy? Goodir- *Sighs* NGONE- Hyacinth is what I like to call a true woman! Pompous and pretentious she maybe but at least she had her husband under her thumb as should always be the way. If only I live up to be 1-10th of the woman she is.

Many a time we’ve heard women and men asking the same old boring question as to whether or not men like strong, opinionated women but hardly ever is the question directed to women in relation to men. So I ask you now do women like strong men? Those who possess opinions or air them as though they were the reincarnation of Julius Caesar? The kind of man who can stand his ground who isn’t afraid to disagree with you and excels in returning witty repartee? The kind who is strong, confident and has an @ss coiled tighter than a rattle snaked jammed between two slabs of prime mountainous rock? Okay- so I added the last bit but the rest pretty much still stands. I only ask because today at lunch time I interrupted a conversation between two female colleagues of mine one of whom was complaining about this unsuccessful blind date she had on the weekend, apparently the dude didn’t appreciate the fact that my work mate actually had ideas of her own instead of giggling and gushing over his biceps. I presume he had biceps with the way she described the dude. Plus personal experience has shown me that dudes who frequent the Gym and guzzle down protein shakes and bars very rarely exercise anything more than their gluteus maximus. (Excuse me for diverting) So this got me thinking, can we women be as simple minded as dudes who’d prefer not to have a woman who is control of her own thoughts? Personally I think I’ve come to the grand conclusion that I’d actually prefer for my future husband to just keep his mouth shut altogether, to nod in agreement and acknowledgement that I am the higher being and he is simply a vessel to which I receive my pleasure and any prospective children I may wish to become in possession of. I mean, do I really want a man who argues back incessantly? Who’s insolent enough to speak when not spoken to? Who dares to scratch and cry at me to stop before I’ve gotten my jollies off? I don’t think so! (wiggles brows in feigned annoyance) I mean who needs the bloody trouble? Give me a polite, obedient biddable man who kisses my feet every now and then and rushes to do my every command, the kind that would tip toe through every controversial issue fairly pirouetting in his efforts to avoid giving me offence. You can keep your delectably opinionated fellows for women who have the patience to condition them. Because I do not, call me sick- a control freak or whatever you like but hell I am what I am. (Stretches her arms and rests them on the back of her head whilst flexibly leaning back on a chair) So ladies what are your own personal wishes on the matter? Let us get to the bottom of this, do women appreciate an opinionated man? Or a quiet unassuming mute who shall lick at her boots and marvel at her intellect? Now don’t get me wrong, a man is entitled to his personal opinions so long as they are in agreement with mine and or he expresses any of these rebellious thoughts in his dreams. Only there shall he have some room to breath.

Hold up, the video was about how women come to terms with their vaginas? LOL Good grief whats to come to terms with? You were born with a vagina, praise be and rejoice! I mean It could have turned out much worse- you could have been born with a penis and shed a few IQ points in the process. Blessed be those who are in posession of a vagina. Ps Men should stay away from womens issues. If we wish to talk about our flapping underlings then allow US to initiate such tender discussions (tries not to laugh and skips off merrily)

People...You know what I find funny? It’s this notion that somehow men are like ravening animals unable to control their baser urges there by placing it upon our female shoulders to uphold the strength of their virtue and honour. How utterly preposterous, we are all individuals and Allah has given us all something called free will. Even the Prophet Yusuf (PBUH) continually rejected the temptation of his boss’s seductive mistress and still be managed to resist-despite being hindered with this affliction called a penis. Anyway I'm done. Peace out and much love

Wait a minute I’m confused Xena and Ibti are one and the same? LOL I had no bloody idea! In that case firstly I’d like to say Ibti nice to have you back walaal (winks and gives a smile) Secondly, with all due respect are you trying to seriously suggest that two Muslims saying as’salamualaykum to each other in greeting while passing in the street is by any stretch of the imagination unlawful Islamically? If so? We shall agree to severely disagree on this matter because its quite clear that no where does it say within the Quran or Hadith that two Muslims cannot greet each other respectfully in passing. I’m not taking about an in-depth private conversation about ones knicker collection for example but a simple Ca-laykumasalam in reply hardly constitutes as tempting a man into sexing one senseless. Ps I also disagree Islam does allow one to use their common sense and if we did today we wouldn’t be living in an era where the most senseless of questions would require a 14 paged fatwa. Ie” If I accidentally swallow toothpaste during Ramadan will I have broken my fast?” you may laugh but this sort of thing is become an increasing ridiculous pandemic.

Originally posted by Sophist: Caring is a human trait and isnt confined or monopolised by one gender! I concur and also happen to agree with Cynical Lady's eye roll.

Hassan said this... '"It is scientifically proven that women are not as stimulated by physique as men" And this.... "Also, it is known that women can better control their behavior than men" These are just some of the things I found as a woman, quite hilarious...I mean? LMFAO! with crisps on toast! (cackles like a deranged witch on crack and begins to wipe off the endless amount of laugh induced tears streaming down her face) My god I've read some funny things in my life but you my friend have really taken the biscuit..LOOOOOL..I guess its been a very long time since I've heard these archaic arguments, (holds on to her stomach for fear of laughter pains)didn't know they still taught such things. Either way thank you very much for the laugh-your humour (though unintentional perhaps) was very well recieved. Bravo! Originally posted by Xena: ^^Well you are not a man, so you don't know if there is a balance between drooling over a woman or ignoring her. If you knew what goes on guys head, you would never put "normal, polite" in their thought process. There is nothing normal or polite about it, some are just good at hiding it, descriptive words for their thoughts would be ranging from animalistic to something else. This whole lets be friendly. Yet not friends is a pointless waste of time and a little game of “let me see how long he can pretend” Your wadaad bashing is going to make me give you a good verbal bashing! Don't make me P.s. Your argument, nor the authors has a leg to stand on in Islam, so forget about that. LOL Holy sh*t! I can't believe I completely forgot about this old topic? LOOOOL Anyway-I love how you protect the dignity of sheik boys from evil old me by patronisingly patting them on the head in one instance and in the next blantantly protraying them to be nothing but horny buggers with flith on their minds. LOL What a generous sister you are! Quite contradictory and very amusing (giggles) ps- Come on! I hardly think Allah would be against the return of a simple brother/sisterly islamic greeting. Since when did As'salamu Calaykum give rise to sexual solicitation? Tisk tisk...Like I said before-common sense people let it prevail

I’ve just come back home from watching the movie Drag me to hell and as a result I was so impressed with it that I decided to write you all a quick review of it. Well what can I say other than it was utterly wonderful and bloody brilliant! Excuse the enthusiasm buts it’s like finding a rare gem amongst the ample of useless rocks that serve has ‘horror” movies today. Throw away those sh*tty Saw 2, 3, 4 and what? 26 is it now movies? and get your @rse down to the cinemas to watch this movie ASAP. For those of you who are unaware of what the movie is about, I’ll give you a quick run down of the plot. Its about a poor-kindhearted loan officer/banker who has to evict an decrepit spooky-gross looking old woman from her home after the lady fails to make her mortgage re-payments, as a result the poor banker named Christine ends up being cursed by the old woman (most likely of eastern-European heritage) who uses dark gypsy magic to do so. From there what ensues is a desperate attempt by Christine to rid herself of the curse by seeking the aid of an Indian “seerer” fortune teller/palm reader to you and me. The curse is pretty bad as it basically involves the summoning of this evil demon called the lamia which literally drags the cursed souls of the damned into the very depths of hell. Where swirling fire, the clawing hands of soul hungry demons and eternal damnation await. I was reluctant I must say to watch another hocus pocus Hollywood mish-mash full of the usual contrived patronizing clichés but I’m telling you this movie was bloody wonderful, easily being one of the best genuinely enjoyable scary movies I’ve seen in a very, very long time. Having become desensitized to just about everything this movie actually made me jump with fright in a number of places, cringe/cry in others and laugh my @rse off as well. Wallahi there were several hilarious and ridiculously good-humored laughs in this and I found myself unabashedly glued to the silver screen in reluctant admiration and giddy excitement with just a healthy dose of the "ooh sh*t" fear factor. The movie was an excellent re-visit to those much loved retro-scary movies which have been updated with a brilliant performance coming from the lead actress Alison Lohman who played the cursed banker. In essence, if you decide to go out and watch a movie this weekend make sure you watch Drag me to hell, it will have you jumping out of yours seats, giggling whilst simultaneously weeping on the insides with paranoid glee at the whole idea of an unyielding hell awaiting the bad. If you don’t say a few extra du’ah’s of “please Allah save me from hell” during your Isha prayer after you watch this film? Then you’re one brave fool. LOL, Over all I had a marvelous time at the cinema and I wish Hollywood would produce greatly enjoyable movies like these instead of boring us with the usual typical no brainier slasher movies, now dont get me wrong I’m hardly a snob, I mean I love mindless violence, sadistic psychopaths drenched with blood and guts as much as the next gal but hell I don’t enjoy bored to death with some of the nonense thats passed of as "scary" for horny teens. Twilight I want my money back! Give me something different, refreshing and at the very least enjoyable. I give this film a 9 of out 10. More if I wasn’t being so finicky. Oh and it was such a lovely change to actually have found myself liking and warming-definitely feeling sorry for the main character. Usually I can't wait for those dumb blond b*tchs to die but I had my heart out for this one- hell I was rooting for her to suceeded all the way. (No pun intended) Here is the trailer for it if you’re yet to see it. http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=p-REviL75 zg Oh and for those of you with a more cultured- (by that I mean sophisticated)Europe an taste in flims try watching “let the right one in”. Beautifully made Swedish film about a 12 year old vampire and her boy neighbor- a very sweet- sinister but poignant film which is understated, eerily wonderful and comes highly recommended.

^- Mmm cook the Shaah with condensed milk and a few spoons of sugar and then shanday the tea and vola- you have yourself the perfect cup of tea. Add a few slices of Mr Kiplings lemon slice cake and your guests are laughing.

Will do Lt Zulfa will do (Salutes and runs off to guzzle a gallon of evian, stuff her face full of some rocket salad and doze off to sleep under the shade of an oak tree situated in hyde park) Blood glorious weather we're having lately- I'm findind it difficult to stay at home for more than 2 seconds.

^--Actually there was one other thread where I mentioned an ogling Nigerian I hardly think that cause to suggest that I enjoy sexual harassment. As for this idea of a “respectable woman” are you trying to suggest that I or any ladies who venture into such places masquerading as restaurants aren’t proper? Simply because I went with a group of ladies in a public place where good food and a good night out with the ladies was promised. *lifts a brow* I hardly think so. Oh and If it wasn’t your intention to insult dear sister then I suggest you adjust the way in which you perhaps express yourself because that one sentence alone was enough to suggest a whole ream of intentional or unintentional insults. As for being explicit? I actually thought I was doing pretty well for me I wasn't eddited or told off this time so I presume my words were acceptable. Ps Sorry for the late reply again I seem to be unable to stick around. I guess its the demensia finaly taking its hold on me. (I always have the feeling that I've forgetton to reply back to someone) Sighs..ahh well

^- lol God, why do you have to be so bloody reasonable? Tisk tisk Ps you are correct mayhap the wedding did take it out of me. It turned out to be wonderful however no thanks to me in truth as I mostly lazed around the place proclaiming "that good- and that tacky" in between stuffing m&m's into my mouth. Quite an amusing couple of days, if not that relaxing.

Oh and I most definitely am not the settling type-I usual always get my way and I doubt I'd stay at home to look after the kids because A. Even when I'm broke I live like an aristocrat and thus I have a certain lifestyle to maintain. B. I doubt I'm the maternal kind so theres a good chance that I'll ship my kids off to boarding school. LOL- I laugh but deep down I think I mean it (shudders) Ah well, you can't win them all? (strolls off)

All I know is I'm no superwoman and I sure as hell am not going to drive myself into a deep chamber of depression trying to perfect my life and “have it all”. Why should I even attempt to be Superwoman when my husband will have to do nothing more than go to work and do the usual deeds society expects from him without taking on any more responsibilities? Hell no. I am not doing everything by myself but I shall have my cake and eat it too (meaning yes to career and a family) money however will be of more importance than A the husband and B the kids. The only way such a thing will be possible is if you married someone of a like mind to you-or a dude hot and horny enough for you that he’d doing just about anything. Most would do just about anything in the begining and if he ends up resenting you later on down the line? Who gives a f*ck I'd just make it my business to make his life miserable if he doesn't co-operate. Ps Who cares what men want? Only the foolish "loved up" ones are fooled into such nonsense. And I would appreciate it if you would refer to those ladies who choose to look after the kids at home "Stay at home mothers". Lets be more politically correct. House wife is so....*shudders* cave-manish. I am all for choice. We women should do as we please, whether that means working or looking after the kids or both.

People people *Waves her hands in the air* I'd firstly like to apologise for taking so damn long to reply to you all but I had a wedding to help organise and literally had no time to myself in over 2 weeks. (Not my own unfortunately) ....LOL-Still the show must go on. Zulfa- I think you misunderstand me as I agree with you sister, everything in the least bit feminine is regarded as being negative- i.e stop acting like a p*ssy, your such a girl, and etc it’s the fault of patriarchal *******ized societies which are to blame. But I wasn’t calling Arab men women nor would I refer to my own sex in such a negative light, nay- I simply used the term Dhillo in conjunction with Arab men because it was the first thing that came to my mind. Dhillo or Dhilow-its all the same to me. Next time I shall be more grammatically accurate then to avoid confusion. LOL Mr Q&A- I find it humorous that you’d jump on the villianising band wagon and thus the aid of the type of filthy “Arabs” I came across whilst insulting your own sisters, does the term Billa deeq ring a bell? Any how I call it how I see it, if I find an Algerian leering-scratching his bollocks and making obscene gestures indicating that I join him in a little tet a tet then I shall refer to him as a Dhillo- Dhillow (more accurately). This goes for just about any male who finds it socially acceptable to behavior in such a manner in such a place-or any place for that matter if I’m honest. Mr Sheebel Oh contraire I’m not insulted at all, I only find it highly amusing that you’d think much of yourself and others that I would care for any attention sought from yourself or anyone else enough to cause “controversy” amongst the herd as it were. LOL-I’ll be honest, I insult and say what I like to amuse only myself 100% of the time. So when I said Dhillo Arab- it wasn’t to make anyone angry or happy- I said it cause I felt like it and damn the consequences. Oh and if I was fond of those filthy mens attentions why would I be explicitly saying that I was uncomfortable? *Lifts a brow* LOL Strange indeed, perhaps your mistaking me for the horny and hormonal teenagers your used to psychoanalysing?

LOL- What? People is it so hard to ask for a man to behave as any normal sane and polite human being would? Surely there has to be a middle ground between drooling on a woman,cratching ones crotch presence in front of her and climbing the walls in fright if one happens to say hello? Why must there be extremes? A simple greeting surely doesn't take much trouble. Whatever happened to common sense? Tisk tisk Ps Wadaads aren't my cup of tea, they're too damn horny for one thing. I know you'd think that you would right up my ally but I assure too much sexual fustration is not a good thing.

^- A passer-by I doubt I would be as annoyed much with, but fellow muslim brothers you've known a while in univercity or whilst growing up with is not something I'd readily ignore. For instance this Somali dude I used to know growing up as a kid (We were neighbours)we played footie together as kids, went to the same Masjid, same primary school even got battered together by the same Macalin....anyway years passed and he turned I guess kinda holy for whatever reason- anyway I saw him one day and was happy to see him and so greeted him asking about his family. He saw me and completely ignored me, the first time I was bemused-shocked even and taken off guard, the second time I made sure to block his path so he couldn't get away like he did last time and....well... I let him have it. Turns out through some twisted sort of reasoning he thought he was being respectful or some such nonsense and apologised for any offense caused. Ever since then he knows not to be so rude and manages to say hello back and inquired about the general health of the family as one tends to do. Long story short a greeting or a kind word doesn't take much effort to make so why cause a problem anyway? Ps- And I should like to see that curtsy along with an imperial kiss to my palm as nature dictates. I would be much obliged.

^- LOL Well said Bangers and Mash- eh? I like the name very catchy as for the song? I can't hear anything this computer is on mute. I guess their going through a phase- 10 years down the road they'll be laughing at this in the local Masjid regaling tales of their wild youth with their fellow Jilbabi wearing sisters. Oh the hilarity Kids you gotta love them. Ps to that African Gangster..Whose got that dudes number?-he is truly something.