Salaan... Rafaad iyo Raaxo. Lakiin, Lakkad, abkoow abkoow. Dumaashi aa la damcaa aah. Mayaa. Fiiri hee Ma Damci Lahayd Dumaashidaa yaa ku jirey? Iikar Jeesto {Ilahaa u naxariisto} maa ku jirey? Inaa fiirsadey ma xasuusti nooh. Kumi or Taano?? I know which one the baqeelyaasha will choose. _______________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Shaqsi: Haye, kaaba do you really want to hear all of these stories? Hokey, iga qabso hee sheekooyinkaan. ________________ Afar maraa la igu soo daadiye {biyo kuleel, that is}. Sadax mar aa kabbo {kabbo taako eh, that is} la iga soo daba tuurey. Shan mar dharbaaxo yaa Carab hoo qabso hee la i dhahey. Laba mar feer iyo faralaab aa la igu saqarjoojiye {xaliimo saniftey waa feertamee miyaa mise...}. Hal mar salboolada dhexdeed aa hal qanjaruufo la igu dhajiye {xaaax, xanuun badanaa, caashadaas xaasid xaasidiina ay ahayd }. Timo jareernimadeey canbuulonimada eh hal maraa la rifay {meel walbaa ka buusnaa nooh oo kuwii horaa isoo buusbuusay, tan marka timaheey ayba aadey}. All of these happened because of this reason {and try not to laugh}: That is right. That is my face. And upon seeing it, every xaliimo faints because I told them from the net that I looked so cool and perfect. I know, I know. It was my fault to tell them that I looked that good. For those who weren't good enough to faint gave me the above mentioned punchlines. None give themselves a chance to know me what is in my heart. And how sad. I am still crying. Istif-Istif-Istif Noo, kool-kat, blossom, rock's chick, noo, I don't need no comfort for now. Dankis, but no dankis. _________________ Shaqsi, honestly brother, there is no interesting story that happened to me personally. Oh, yes, there was one that was so good, and this one can't be mentioned. After that, nothing that seems interest. Good or bad. Ee marka saas waaye. Nice topic, by the way. And is that business of yours still open? I mean can I invest in it? Kamoon. And when it comes it to be like Enron or WorldCom, my money will be on the desk. Or feer iyo feerkiis. I don't care inside trading. Or lousy accounting. My money is my money. And I expect, whethere there is a bankruptcy or not, my money back. And fast. Or face the furious. _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Nuune, mey erti widaayow? Tiiem aah. Ebidkaa ma isoo marin. Mise bii-em aa ka wadaa. Carab gajahaa taacun. Lakiin xariifka waxaa isoo xasuusisay markii dagaalka dhacaayi anaga ciyaalkeen waxaan aa qaadi jirney: Madfad kaare, hoobiyo jiib; bii-em bagaase, bee-bee shee; em sigistiin {M-16} dhaawac maleh, saar sideedan sidaaso kale... Ar wey socon jirtey. Maan. Can I have a third speller? I mean a third singer. You know these two are far from what I consider my own sound singers. Hmm, kamoon, allow me to say a third party. And aheey, the third party is Shimaaaaaali Axmed Shimaali Yaa heestiis iloobi karo. Shamsooy...Kasheegee, kuu sheegee kaa sheegeeye kusii sheegeeyee, kasii sheegeeye... Xariif Xaaji dheh. I might also say Sulfa. Hokey, hokey. If you insist I have to draw one of them. C/qaadir Jubba or Xasan Aadan Samatar. Hmm... I would say Xasan Aadan Samatar. See, maay-maay markii uu ku heesaayo lee fahmi karaa. Xariish or Mundul?? ________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Of course, fadhi carbeed. Maaan. Soomaali waa ilbaxdey nooh, walaahi, almost 50% guryaha maanta Soomaaliya familkood dagan yihiin fadhi carbeed ay qabaan, which is so good. Haye, game-kaan wali waa socdaa miyaa bo? Hokey bo. Xaaji Qamsiin or Caasi Waalidiin??? Oobis, yaqeey of course I hope you know what I mean. Xaaji Qamsiin iyo Caasi nooh. Basaskii Xamar Cadeey. __________________ P.S.: Dadkiin kuhaayo this game is getting bored. Jidka noo baneeya, bil axsaan. Ferma bil fafagoore. Xoog ma'aha. Either participate or keep afkaa as silent as it was markii fud laguugu soo siiye aduunkaan {or if you were crying at that time, keep crying}.

Salaan... Manaala, baliis, afka noo jilci yaqeey. Kirishi? Mirishi? Abkoow, abkoow, filin Hindi maa noogu soo qabatey ereyada? Ga naga sii hee. Ebidkeey ereyadaas ma maqlin nooh. Cajiin maa ka wadaa? Even though, I still have no idea, so maxaaba choice sameyaa, but I will nonetheless take kirishi; see, it sounds too fine. Makulaal or Yaanyuur?? Oobis, they are same. LoL. Waa idiin been goorey nooh. Hokey, hokey. Been Hawaas or Cigaal Shidaad?? _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Jamaal and Kaamila: We have a real case in here. May we therefore have your attention, baliis? Dankis. We of the Nomad Community need a logical, rational reason from you two. And quickly as possitive. We of the Nomad Community had known you more than yourselves. And you got married right behind everybody’s door. None--to my knowledge so far--had been invited to your private or unprivate aroos. We deeply feel we had been let down; uncared; or even ignored. We of that community felt that we were close-knit nomad family members, so if one happy occasion comes around, we will all celebrate; and likewise if sorrow comes, we will all show our anguished faces. But, and yes, your aroos came. And what did we see? Xalwo la iska qarsanaayo. No nikaax. Nothing. Forget even about the soori. Even the imaam of somaliaonline.com had not been invited; imaam must be present and it is mandatory and religiously to perform him the nikaax, at least. Yes, the imaam is our brother Mujaahid {in for Taqwa, who is in an extented vacation}, and so far he said nothing to his knowledge did he know this. So in that case, we even suspect it to be a void contract. Not one witness that can come out forward and testify to your marriage yet. And yes, dare I remind you, Jamaal, to this. We were even witnessing when you two got together. Or rather acquaitanted together. It was we, even, who suggested Kaamila to register her user name; see your both poetic praisings were out of hand on public. If you even dare to deny it, well this is the link: http://www.somaliaonline.com/cgi-local/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=7;t=000064;p =2 So, we have a real case. And we need a real quick explanation from you two. Now, the ball is on your side. ________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Darn, did somebody say C/raxmaan Sudeysi??!! Maan, does this guy have a VOICE or what? Walaahi, cod Ilaaha siiye sheekhaan. The best voice I had ever heard. Whether in music, in quraan or basickly in hadal caadi an. This sheekh, C/raxmaan Sudeysi, got an unchallenged, surperb voice. Not only one voice? But, he can simultenously switch to another melodic one. Got at least two wonderful different voices. Oh, God. Kool-Kat, your question had been asked, to my memory I believe, not once but twice. Well, hokey, I will try to say it again. Somalinet, of course. LoL. Since you know the answer yourself, why aa noo daaline hee yaqeey. Back to the Raxiima's one also: Political Science. Why? Kamoon. I am when it comes to siyaasad, as siyaasi as sayid siyaad. Faryaamo or Fuundi?? ________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Oh, yes, brother A+, Soomaalis got the most talented prayers in Africa currently. No need to say on the 2010 Koobka Aduunka, we can suitable fill and play on the one held in Germany four years from now. Let me tell you the very talented players our country has to offer. Some did, minimally, retire. Others still refused to do so. On squad, currently, with their usual nick-names: Max'ed Xirsi Morgan {balaayo kula moorganaate, OFFENSE} Max'ed Qanyare Afrax {farax u daa igaarkaan. DEFENSE} Max'ed Xasan Nuur Shaatigaduud {ar shaatiga iska soo badal, baliis. DIYEESHE} Xuseen Max'ed Faarax Caydiid {who can even insult him, let alone he accept it, OFFENSE} Cusmaan Caato, {our favourite skinny striker. Off-Defense. Otto} Aadan Nuur Gabyoow {oh, he has a lot of poetric words under his curtain, which in turn can influence his co-players. Playing with injury, thus minimizing his ability to score and defend. Kuwaataro} Muuse Suudi Yalaxoow {aree xaa la yalaxee? OFFENSE} Cumar Xaaji Masale, {basal aa dhaanto kan. DUWE} Jaamac Cali Jaamac {your typical jaamac with a lot of endevour. Best associated with the skills that equalize C/laahi Yuusuf. DEFENSE} Cumar Jees {our most famous favourite boy, who has a unique ability to make people to admire his JEESTO to handle the ball. He can make RONALDO like a park's kid. SEMI-OFFENSE} C/laahi Yuusuf Axmed {a hard core defensive player. Surprised most of the commentators on his quick offense to score a HUGE goal a couple months ago. DEFENSE} The coaches: C/qaasin Salaad Xasan {coached two years in row so far, achieved what the critics never expected. WORST coach ever} Kaahin Riyaale {assistant coach. Tries hard to tell the COACH it is HIS way which is better--his FOLLOW-OR-I-LEAVE way} C/lla Deeroow Isaaq {second assistant coach. Had no influence so far} Retirees: Cali Mahdi Max'ed Cali Nafta {retired, currently on the bench, however he can reshape and can strike any day with his tactical plays. DEFENSE} Generaal Caydiid Senior. C/raxmaan Tuure {completely retired from the game}

Salaan... There was a tournament week held in Toronto this past week. It is held every year. Participated by teams from all over the world {a little exaggeration there though }. This year's participating teams were from Holland, England, Ohio, Minneapolis, Rochester, Atlanta, and several teams from within Toronto itself. Its final conclusion game was held on yesterday. And I went. God, was I surprised or what. I must have to say this. I was really flabbergasted or rather astonishly surprised to see my fellow Soomaalis fill the stadium on the final day, and cheer the two oppossing teams, without resorting the USUAL tactics out of the game that was associated with this tournament in prior years. It really touched my heart in a special way to see my brothers and sisters sitting there, cheering and nothing but supporting. I say I am surprised because we in general Soomaalis is known to criticize the least minor things. We enjoy to find fault with that. But Ilaahaa Mahad leh, to my very surprise it was really a good game. What even surprised me was that there were all walks of life of Soomaalis were there. A wadaad with a gar like God-knows sitting or sharing the spectator stand with canbaro with tight clothes there { :eek: , see you don't see that in many places}. A faarax who was enjoying the game, rather than giving the usual dacaayad against his fellow faaraxis--players or otherwise. I hope this supporting continues and expands to the other Qurba countries we Soomaalis reside. By the way, the final teams were Banaadir and Soomaali Star. I heard--see, I and my friend left after half-time due to the unexpected stormy rain that forced most of us all but to leave--and Banaadir won, so it had been said.

Salaan... Rock's Chick: I don't know. I am faarax, I guess. So, I wouldn't be able to choose one--see, I don't even know it. Or since I am a faarax, I would say JANBAL TALYAANI, instead of Dacas. LooooL. Oh, speaking of shoes and you living in Koronto. What about this choice: Aldo or Pegabo?? If you don't live in Koronto {noo, not Kanata, but Koronto} don't answer that question. Only Koronto folks know these stores.

Salaan... Buubto, walashiis this is so unfair. This is one of the hardest little chooses I had ever seen. Maaaaan. Maka Xaaji Banaadir. Or Awkuuku. Maaaaan. My head is spinning on. Can I go with both? Baliiiiiis. Hokey, I have to choose a one. Hmm...{still scratching my head} I would say, finally, MAKA XAAJI BANAADIR. This guy has some unusual way of making you laugh so hard. Have you watched a clip from Shirkii Jabuuti? He was there, comparing every imaginable leader of the 20th century to the warlords. Even Madaxweynaha Jabuuti Ismaciil Cumar Geele, who couldn't possibly understand some of the Xamari words Maka was saying, was even laughing so hard. So, again, I would go with Maka Xaaji Banaadir. Ninac loos or Ninac lubaani?? __________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Filsaneey, maxaa kalee, shaah abuu shaax yaqeey. Casariiga noo shub yaqeey. . Dankis walashiis, Haye, how about: Dee or Nooh??? If you are a qaldaani {oobis, no xag-xagasho yaah, kaftan lee} or xamaraawi {walaweyn, } STAY OUT TO CHOOSE this time, baliis. It is intended people who neither use these most frequent used informal words in Soomaali lingo. _______________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... LooooooL at Desktop. You nailed it, brother. This is really what this game is all about. Xarash or madax. LoooooL. Fu'aad, my God. You are kidding, right? Can't I choose a middle path that neither has a foot on fat nor skinny. It depends on the circumstance though. If I was now in Xamar, I would say FAT, of course. But, in here, in Koronto, I would choose being skinny. Kisi or Dhaban??? _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Niiko {even though, I don't get what qarami is} Hmm... let me think. Yes, Doqon or Jaahil. Wait a minute, they are in same category, I guess. How about then, hmm... Do you agree, so far, what most had chosen? Yes or No?? __________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Pop, of course. {hard decision in there, though}. Xaasid or Asbax? _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Ooooh, baliis. This man, If my memory of him serves better, is one of the worst internal enemy Muslim world had ever produced itself. He really hated Islaam and anything associated with it. He publicly said he wasn't sure if he was a Muslim, or a Christian either. But, he knew was Turkish to the bone. Loved it. Worshipped it much. He completely tried to uproot Islaam from Turkey and its surrounding areas. Luckily, it didn't really affected that much. And thank Allah for that. But, we do now know how he really changed Turkey forever. At least since then. Two possitive things I heard about him are that he saved {whatever it means} Turkey from completely sliced by then powerful houses of Europe, particularly from the thirstly and bloody Greeks who desperately wanted to recapture Istanbul {Constantinople to them}. And second good thing about him is he outlawed much of other sects, who barely resembled about Islaam in any way. Especially, the Alawite sect who somehow incorporated fire in their prayers. Muslims worshipping FIRE!!! Oh, this man really disliked Islaam and I don't personally like to read his biography or any book to do with him. He is a man who thought dressing like a European would make you a very EDUCATED person. He is a man who shamely changed the whole name system of Turkey, especially erasing the title Pasha mostly used by Cusmaaniyiintii and its officials at that time. ________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Since some folks do take everything too seriously, it is about time they have a little wisecracks and enjoy this piece. Since this piece even combines us Muslims and humour--in a way. Relax, enjoy and have a little some qaxwo while reading it. Not enough, how about a cup of isbarmuuto. Oh, yeah, with ice, of course. ________________ There is such a thing as Muslim humor. No, really. I was asked to write about Muslim humor. What? Muslim humor? Now that is funny! Jokes...about Muslims??? Isn’t that HARAAM? Of course not. After all, we Muslims follow a prophet who not only smiled often, but one who laughed so heartily that his teeth showed. In our striving to make a difference in this world, we often forget that. Plus, in these difficult days, there isn’t much to laugh about. But laughter might just be the remedy that we all need. The image most Muslims have about comedy is that it makes light of serious situations, and consequently trivializes things. It is true, comedy does make light of situations, but if it’s done right, it sheds light and perspective rather than trivializes. Even further, comedy brings wisdom in a way that straight commentary just can’t do. I’ve seen it myself countless times, as I’m sure you have too. But when it comes to Muslims and comedy, we seem to be lacking something. We’re afraid to laugh at ourselves. When we cultivate the ability to laugh at ourselves, that also gives us a license to make ironic (and insightful) points about others. It’s one of the most effective methods of communication and understanding. Through humor, people learn about you. In a way, you become more human. I think I know more about Jewish culture and Jewish people from watching Seinfeld than I have by reading any book on the topic. But how many people think it’s funny that I found more than two seams on my ihram after I performed Hajj? Or my dad buying ten cases of “Islamic vinegar?” “Huh? No, Baba, it’s balsamic!” So who am I? Why should you care what I think about Muslim humor? Well, for starters, I’m an Iraqi, my wife is Indo-Paki and my son’s name is Zaki (now say that five times really fast). I was born in Baghdad (don’t laugh), reared in Phoenix (quit the snickering), and now I live in Hollywood (okay, will you guys just STOP?). I was your average high school class clown/drama geek. I lettered in speech and I wanted to major in theater in college. And, like your average class clown/drama geek, I was “strongly encouraged” by my dad to do something more practical. So, I became an engineer, reluctantly. Yet, even while I was being “practical,” the impractical (and unfulfilled) side of me sought out places to be creative. I auditioned for Community Theater and took acting courses and loved it. I even got a gig imitating Jerry Lewis in an ice show at a major theme park (no, I didn’t skate. You’re still laughing, aren’t you?). I eventually wound my way to New York and received formal training at the Actors Studio. And now I’m an actor. An actor who happens to be an American Muslim--one of a small but growing number. Though I love to make people laugh (some would say I "need" to make people laugh), I consider myself an actor rather than a comic. But at Muslim functions, I’m always asked to do some sort of stand-up routine. And, since Henry V’s Saint Crispin’s Day speech wouldn’t go over too well at a Muslim fundraiser, I usually do a few impersonations and they usually love it. At a youth camp, I once wrote and performed a skit called "Xaraam oooor Xalaal." It was a game show parody where the host would state a situation and the contestants would buzz in their answer whether it was "xaraam" or "xalaal." Q. A horse you are riding stops to drink from a trough that you know has alcohol in it. Haraam oooor Halaal? A. Haraam because, if the horse sweats, the alcohol might transfer to the rider. Needless to say, the skit created some controversy. Some people thought I was making light of the prophet (PBUH), but my intention was only to parody our own zeal and preoccupation with minutia. Others failed to even get the jokes and approached me afterwards concerned that they hadn’t known about some of the sins and wanted to clarify the rules so they could be sure to stay clear of them. I couldn’t believe it--talk about mired in the minutia! Though I assured them that the skit was only a parody, something tells me there’s a whole generation of kids out there secretly nervous about riding on drunk horses. So my hope is that, one day, we (Muslims in particular) can say "no pork on my fork please" and it can be as funny and as part of our lexicon as saying gefilte fish. I also think we need to start writing and telling stories from our perspective rather than letting others tell us and the rest of the world who we are. That’s my hope...and it’s also my goal as an American Muslim comedic actor, inshaAllah. . . . InshaAllah... "The dinner will be at 6:00, inshaAllah." "I will do my best, inshaAllah." When my sister-in-law was a kid, she thought "inshallah" meant "probably not," as in: "Mom, can we go to Disneyland?” "InshaAllah." Or: "Mom, can I have a pony?" "InshaAllah." ...(Now you can laugh) ________________ By Kamaal al-Marayati ________________ Admins, baliis do not move this thread into the jokes section. See, some of our brothers and sisters are so serious, they rarely visit the jokes section or never visit it. See, this is exactly what they need. Laughing sometimes is good for your health--and for your wealth too {don't ask me how yet, }. And you can come back to your serious business after a little cracks. I promise you won't be disappointed. _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Passport is a passport. Nothing else, yaqeey. Mujaahid, I don't know anyone who did something outrage to obtain a passport, but I do know some weird stories about who got a REAL passport from their adopted countries. There was this guy who used to live in Sacuudiya. Who was so discriminated while living there. Treated like a dirty man. Finally, got a chance to come to Canada. Settled Canada. Lived here for a while, and worked hard enough to earn some enough $$. And finally, he got what his big grin on his face says it all: the REAL passport and being a real citizenship of his adopted country. With his $$ on his account, he decided to revenge against the Sacuudis. Went back there. Upon his arrival, by leaving from the airplane, he was wearing SHORTS. And faranjees t-shirt. Just to offend the very first Sacuudi person he sees. Well, by coming the counter, there was already some strange lookings from the locals. Dropped his passport on the counter, and spoke some hip-hop, rap-like English, with a voice like a drunken fishermen. They immediately thought he was a lost African-Canadian adoon. That proved exactly what he wanted. Well, all month long he stayed on Sacuudiya, the looks on him got more and more. Since he knew Carabic perfectly, he could overheard them talking about him and saying all of these darn stuff about madoow and how darn they are. He just kept staring at them saying, "What! You talking to me! Speak aloud!" Of course that was in a deliberate English. And they would keep their mouths shut. Ar maan, waa ka raayi yaqeey. And finally, he got exactly what he wanted. Just that. Because some even worshipped him, since thinking he was a big time Adoon with a lot of $$ on his back. You know Carabta are so xariif yaqeey, they know when you are a real Adoon and when you are a real fake adoon with $$. LoL. ________________ And there was this story. This Soomaali faarax lived in U.S.A. Sponsored his family. But there was some major problems and it required him to travel to all the way to Utange, Kenya. Utange was a refugee camp Soomaalis used to live. Upon his arrival, he wanted to meet the top official who was responsible about the sponsorship operations. He had been told the location where the official has on her office. He went there to the next day. Upon his arrival, and thinking to enter without a permission to her inner office, this security guard caught him and told him to stay back. He told him saying I am an AMERICAN. Showing his passport and other identifications. Well, since the security guard was a Kenyan--who always thought Soomaalis are Soomaalis. Nothing else. To make a long story short, the high officer heard the arguments and came out. He told her that he was a naturalized American into and more than two decades and this mere mortal security guard couldn't allow him to see her, a fellow citizen. She was so MAD. Yelling, "How dare you keep an American outside and not allow to see me??!!" Well, the poor security guy lost his job. And had plenty of little dharbaaxo--face slappings. __________________ And then there is this further story. This xaajiyo was getting her citizenship. In Canada, people over the age of 65 aren't required to answer the questionaire book or submit any tests. And this xaajiyo was older than 65. Finally, when she all got her papers and had become officially a Canadian, the interviewer simply asked her interpreter if she can name the current prime minister of Canada. Just little question and nothing else. Xaajiyo was quick to answer back saying, "Oooh, that AF QALOOC guy. Who speaks French when he talks one side of the jaw, and speaks English on the other side." When it was interpreted, the official was laughing so hard. And said finally, "You really, ma'am, do deserve to be a Canadian." LoL. By the way, only those in Canada know how our Prime Minister talks when he tries to speak. His mouth is like a broken cheeks. __________________ And you are asking us if a new passport from another country does anything for us. It does wonders :cool: and it does nothing. __________________

Salaan... WooooooooooooooooooooW, aqiyaarta. Am I glad to see all of you in that mood or what. It is really a special day. And we should be grateful into it. Again, Soomaali Hanoolaatoo, Ha is raacdo. Dalka soo anigu malihi?? Haa Haa Haa!!! Dhulka soo anigu malihi?? Haa Haa Haa!!! Ninkii gumeysi wade bee geeridda dhibeysaa, Waqtigii dhamaayoo waa dhaqaaqi donaa And Ilahoo Soomaaliya kadhig dalkii ku baarbaaro nabad, barwaaqo iyo bash bash: Amiiiiiin!! Peace to our nation. The Rock's Chick: Speaking of Canada Day and you being in Koronto, there is a higher chance that you went to that ruwaayad xaleey. Didn't you???!! Laa Ilaaha, Ilaa laaah...was it hot {speaking of the weather, that is } or what? It was my very first time going to ruwaayad {actually, it was a semi-concert} and what did I see? Our sisters competing who is wearing the tighest clothes. :eek: :eek: In this case, even the most Hollywood's Jennifer Lopezes would seem girls who live in a MODEST territory. To be honest with you, our sisters went far and far. _________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Kowda Luulyo is a day we should--would--never forget. No matter how or what. Or where we are. Happy to you all, my fellow nomads. Soomaali hanoolaato. Soomaali ha guuleysato. Soomaali ha midoowdo. __________________ Macsalaama!!!

Salaan... Aqiyaarta, idinka aaba ila fahanteen. Ar some of you did ask me where I got these eccentric laws from. Oh, just the next door yaqeey. Yeah, www.dumblaws.com And hoorah, you are there. There are so many of them on that site. Nuune: Abaa waa camiranee yaah. Ebidkeey ma maqlin naago timaha loo xaabinaayo oo basayuul dirito laga dhigaayo. Sharcigaas intuu ka socdaa? Ar tuuladii aa ka socotey aa waxaas ka dhici jireen aa filaa. LoL. ___________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Lakkad, yeah duqa. The boys will be the old boys again. The likes of Mattheaus, Klinsmann, Voller, and the rest. The old famous, beautiful jerseys will once again shine. Count on us, you Brazilian sambas. We are still the Boys who made in 1990 World Cup finals Maradona cry--for bad. Now, enjoy the old memories from that Cup. Bakinbaawar lee dheh. Remember this rigooro: Remember that one, Samba fans? Well, that will repeat itself. Only this time, will the players be Brazilians--CRYING OUT ALOUD. Now, watch us on this Sunday. _______________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... Iyaaah, mahaan dey Sawaaxili aaba jac iyo juq laga siinoyaa, maan. Wewe kuli umbaya kabisa. Xagiyaa Mungo. Saasaa gaani wakara bisha, saa niini, ya samaaniya. Kamansiyaa, leeta kabaandha biloosho? Hakuna kabaandha. Leeta $$, iko naaniya hakuna doolariya. Ar kaas af Kiikuuyo uu ahaa. Afkaas maxaa ka helaa hee. Af Kiikuuyo nooh. Saan lee ma dhihi jirinoo: Atararee oo kahaa aahaah. You would really think they are really laughing when they speak. Kiikuuyo dheh bo. _____________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... These are some wacky laws that do exist in some countries on this world. Some are really, really beyond the description of being wacky and bizarre. Yet, they do exist and are enforced laws. Oh yeah, some did exist and are ancient laws; and they aren't imposed laws anymore, however they are still laws that should be respected. Oh, enjoy. And heed this, it is no joke. They are REAL laws. Thai Laws: It is illegal to leave your house if you are not wearing underwear {they are kidding, right? No jaamac would leave without his cali falaax}. You must wear a shirt while driving a car {I don't know why, though}. Singaporean Laws: Failure to flush a public toilet after use may result in very hefty fines {head this, boys. If you ever visit Singapore, never forget this}. It is illegal to pee in an elevator {if you ever encounter Jameekans dhalinyaro, tell that law; those who live in Koronto know them very well}. The sale of gum is prohibited, but any person can chew it. French Laws: Between the hours of 8AM and 8PM, 70% of music on the radio must be by French artists. An ashtray is considered to be a deadly weapon {if hashtariig is that deadlier, what about cigarettes?}. Australian Laws: Children may not purchase cigarettes, but they may smoke them {this is finer than that French law above}. It is illegal to walk on the right hand side of a footpath. English Laws: A bed may not be hung out of a window {oh yeah, you can say that some idiot who is moving, trying to think wisely, can try to do this}. It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance {or so it has BEEN}. It is illegal to leave baggage unattended {who will, legally speaking, will leave his goodies unattended}. Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime {yeah, if only the suicider person survives, though}. Excluding Sundays, it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow and arrow {centuries old you may call. But does this still exist? Or this really shows how Englishmen really hated their fellow Scots?}. Destroying or defacing money is illegal {oh, yeah. How rich this person might be to do this}. Chinese Laws: To go to college you must be intelligent {or should we say, intelligent ENOUGH. Adduun mucjisadiis lee}. Swiss Laws: It is illegal to flush the toilet after 10 P.M. if you live in an apartment {where are Reer Dixon? Oh, they are in Koronto, not in Switzerland, LoL.}. A man may not relieve himself while standing up, after 10 P.M. {Aha??!! :confused: }. If you forget you car-keys inside the car and you leave the car open, you will be punished {oh, yeah, only babuur qanax eh}. Moroccan Laws: Anyone in company with someone who possesses narcotics, even if they are unaware that their companion has them, can be tried for the same crime {WooooooW!! :eek: Give me a break}. South Korean Laws: Traffic police are required to report all bribes that they receive from motorists {this is so funny, maan}. Italian Laws: Striking someone with a fist is considered a felony {if it isn’t felony, what EXACTLY it is then? Oh after all, it is a fist. Better say you can't have your hand}. A man may be arrested for wearing a skirt {in Talyaaniga, you can’t wear MACAWIIS in public. Oooooh, maaan}. Canadian Laws: Citizens may not publicly remove bandages { I didn’t know this. Bas waaye, Canadian maba noqoyaani nooh}. Dutch Laws: It is legal to smoke pot, buy it, or have less than 5 grams with you {rejoice, Cocaine people and your marijuana partners. Faarax, noo. Jaad is banned in that country, but you can smoke some pots }. Danish Laws: Attempt to escape from prison is not illegal, however, if one is caught he is required to serve out the remainder of his term {how easy, fellas}. No one may start a car while someone is UNDERNEATH the vehicle {maan, this is getting funnier}. American Laws: In Utah, first cousins can marry, but only after they're 65 years old {now, u sheeg faarax iyo caasho inee tan soconeynin}. In Utah, birds have the right of way on all highways {perhaps, we need the definition of a ‘bird’}. Training a bear to wrestle is a felony in Alabama {gees hadii tahey bo samee horta}. In Delaware, it's illegal to sell perfume as a drink {yaa marqaansan oo barfuun sharaab u maleeyo?}. In Ohio, it is illegal for more than five women to live in a house {now, xaliimiyaashiin iskaabulo Ohaayo ku dagan ogaada hee taas }. In New York, the penalty for jumping off a building is death {yeah, this works perfectly if the person ‘tries’ to jump, but didn’t or if the person jumped, but lived enough to face the charge}. A recently passed anticrime {in Texas} law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed [perhaps, Mr. Bush forwarded and legislated this law while he was the Governor of that State}. In West Virginia, it is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs. In Louisiana, you may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant {hadii xariif iyo geesi tahey, samee bo :cool: }. In Maine, You may not step out of a plane in flight. :eek: In Maryland, it's illegal to take a lion to the movies {yes that means a lion can’t be your best friend to have a fun and take to a theatre}. ________________ Macsalaama!!

Salaan... For the last couple weeks, Fifa polled the football fans around the world to choose their Dream Team. More than a million and half responded. I was one of them. But, the sad thing is some strikers on this so-named Dream Team is beyond my comprehension. Some real good players had been left off. And that is so sad. We see players like Romario and Baggio making the list, while it leaves the good old ones that conjures the mind: Socrates, Mathiaus, Ruud Gullit, Zico, and among hall of famers left unchosen. This is what the fans had chosen to be their Dream Team: If you don't know who is who on that picture, here are that famous familiar faces' names. From the top forwarders, from left to right: Joon Garuuf {John Gruff, a Dutchman}, Beele {Pele, a Brazilian} and Romaariyo {Romario, a Brazilian also} Midfielders, from left to right: Maaradona {Maradona, Argentinian}, Sidaane {Zidane, a French man}, Baajiyo {Baggio, Italian}, and Balaatini {Platini, French} Defenders, from left to right: Maldiini {Maldini, Italian}, Bakinbaawar {Beckenbauer, German}, Karloos {Carlos, Brazilian} The goalkeeper: Liif Yaashin {Lev Yashin, Rusian} Some do, no questions asked, deserve to be on that list, but kamoon Baggio is on while Mathiaus, Zico, Hagi or even Valderamma are not. Kamoon, that is something else. What about Romario? Didn't the fans have a chance to see other forwarders; other great, great forwarders. Among them, Ruud Gullit, Klinsman, Rossi, Van Basta, Careca, etc. And look at the defenders. While Beckenbauer deserves, others are not certainly. Just take a look at Carlos. Does he deserve to be on that list? I don't think so, while we have a real great defenders of all time. Among these: Rummenige, Frank Baresi, etc. Well, the fans have spoken, but certainly that wasn't my list. __________________ Macsalaama!!