^^^why is that a sad fact dear?^

LOOOL^ There is a such thing as too miskeen. some guys will agree to anything They think YOU want THEM to agree to :rolleyes: At times you push just to see how flexible the person is. It reminds me of a funny thing that happened earlier in the week. I said this dude in one of those hypothetical questions/ situations "if we were married and I wanted to go for a 2week holiday to the Caribbean with (Farah)a male friend, would you object?" He said "no that’s totally cool with me" ! I was like WHAT! Are you okay dude. Some guys you look at them and you can imagine some women taking the piss for the rest of his life! lool. There is a such thing too much of a softy/ miskeenimo. But that’s not the women's fault ( well it is for taking advantage) but primarily he needs to learn to put his foot down, and set the barriers/ limits. :cool:

:rolleyes: the topic title is way bigger than the content!

STOICI totally agree with you on everything right there. I just hate the attitude that people develop towards the kids and 1st wife. Sometimes I swear they do more damage than the 2ed marriage. We already have a Somali society full of single families sadly. I have to point out that the wife and kids do not need PITY, they need support and help learning to stand on their own two feet rather than looking around in the dark. Sadly again the Somali society does not have the societal infrastructure to help these families, instead the get ignored, labeled, laughed at, and at best pity. This means that society can never improve or move forward but rather remains stagnant and never infiltrated by new ideas and solutions. On the whole the society just falls behind other societies until they self distract or become like animals in compromise to civil society.

I'm name is not Ibtilo hun, Please get it righ, IBtilo does not have a good connotations, in fact I think it is quiet negative, so yaan cannka kala kuu jeex (I’m rip your other cheek) keep it right. My mother tongue is Somali but in any case I do speak it, I just find it hard to read and write!

Canjeex really. I don't know who to believe. :Dlool Devil: Allah know best, but if you are like that then it is probably a coping method for you. If you are not like then I suggest you don't ask for things like that for Allah can make what is on tongue/ figures true for you. That’s my sincere advise for you.

Thats the first talk i listen to all way to the end, and i enjoyed it! Thanks for sharing. IT was beautiful

^^^are you okay dear. Don't make a joke like that, i know someone like that. Not funny

HOw do u you he is divorced Girl and why would he tell you why on a public forum! you are too fast! lool EDIT: Oh i know how you know IT now, lool my bad hun

CAnno Geel. Don't make me tell on you! As for my forward PM.. What can I say it is year 2007 now, things have changed since your time dear, forward you call it, but for the young people it is a normality!. In line with that, the life style IT expects is also last century, and hence very easy for me to accommodate, in fact it is a poor level IT is use to, however doubt still remains about ITs capabilities and capacity, not to mention few other things which I care not to mention in public In the interest of protecting what is left of IT privacy and Xishood, I suggest you back down jeelgiir.

^^easy death, Why would she wish us an easy death in 2007?? i take back my Ameen! aliya41.

Loooool^^^ vote him for what, why should he get a a price for pointing out what the rest of the world already knew? :confused: They should all think like that damit! He immediately dropped the news to me that he got a second wife. My jaws dropped as I listened to him explaining how he will support two wives and four children. An instant agony of the poor cheated souls flashed in my memory. The first thing that comes to my mind was the poor wife and the four children that will be notified about their father/husband getting a second wife. I politely asked him if he did notify his wife about the second wife. He brushed it off as if it is a simple matter that will be solved once the news reaches. He quoted religious texts to support his action. I have no qualm about him getting a second wife, but what I begged to differ with him was the way he is taking a marriage as a simple thing in the western world. How in the freaking world would one support four children and two wives on a dead end jobs like driving a cab? Isn’t this a cheat to the little innocent kids that are brought in this world? When the crying and the wailing subsides who would sacrifice financially and emotionally, isn’t the kids and wives? When will Somalian men suddenly remember that honesty in ones own limit of living is not a shame? ^^I don't think that it will have any long term affect on the kids or the wife. She will learn to live with it like most other Somali women I guess. What usual happens is he will leave the old family and spend most of his time with the new family. The old family will just get on with life and develop an almost separate life to their previous one. I think that it is important to understand that most Somali families are not made up in the usual family structure of they rely on the husband and if he leaves them they will all die. Generally they can sustain themselves with or with out the husband, this goes even for people living in the miyi in Somalia. When my dad remarried I don't think anyone the kids really bother with him, and my mother took the role of both a father and mother, and they just left him with his new family although my mum never made any divorce demands or anything, but my parents were virtually divorced and they had two very different life’s. In conclusion I think people worry endless about second wife's etc and impact on kids, wife’s etc, I don't think it will do any lasting damage nor will it more difficult for them to have a good life. It is almost normally now for kids to have only one parent present through their childhood. In saying that, it is not a good thing to happen to people (kids or kids) but at the same time I hate this “oh you poor thing” attitude that people adopt for the kids and wife and label them as “haarki laanaciy” :rolleyes:

^i second that: one says you have to live with it! Torturing him before you kill him Doing something involving a knife, gloves and cutting… Hunting the other woman down and giving her a home made nip tuck Cleaning his bank account dry before taking off to another country Setting his house on fire Setting him up to go to prison, like you go on holiday to Thailand make sure there is some drugs in his bag! :eek: :eek: Looking at the poll, it is funny that 2women will "send him to his lord" loool. loool :cool:

^I hate that picture! ^ why waste time wondering what happened to him :rolleyes: I hope he is dead, lying in a dich somewhere along with his friend Geid and every other warlord in the somalia region. AMEEN to that. :cool:

loool. The Arabs are the same as well. Very few know their date of birth, and those that do transfer the months/ dates wrong. lool

^lool^ AAliyah41 amen to dat. what is "guul"? :confused: Red sea yaan luugu xiidi with your name dear, GMbay is not too far from you ends

Something Very very Dodgy, I was so shocked to read it, that I promptly send him a PM and demanded he removed it. He was so very shamed afterwards, I was astonished, how could a Somali oddy even think, let alone write IT and post IT on a public forum. He named it n (for NEVER again) loool

You made a book. Erm Okay, if it is in english i write, send it to me.

^^^You know I was wondering the same thing as well. Somali people in general are very nationalistic people, also if they feel under attacked for religious reasons they seem to stick together. I Know (seen/ heard) that many "somaliland" individuals joined the war, (same going from as far the UK to do so) so for a short time at least Somalis as a whole have found a common enemy to focus on. When and if this common enemy disappears I wonder if it will return to the old ways, or will it deteriorate even worse for the whole region, or maybe just maybe it might get better. I guess we'll just have to wonder for a while as for the post: very impressive indeed

But i don't agree, because "private ibtisam" might have "guts", or maybe she is just cheeky, or maybe the major is her friend, not a serious question....the list is endless, it does not say anything about her good self esteem at all dear. There re limitations that have nothing to do with esteem, but to do with reality, ones beyond your control, ability. There are determining factors and outside influences that put some sort of limitations on all of us. As i said you are still a child so wait and see! On a side note, I really dislike people who cannot acknowledge their own limitations and short comings, and expect you to also not to notice or simple put up with it! I mean helllllo seriously! :rolleyes: :cool:

^^^they got paid! and they sold their daughters to some reach dude. They would've added the mother too, if they were offered enough money :rolleyes: lol@never listen to an imam again

loool. :rolleyes: :eek: this is getting depressing. Sorry miss sooo light skin, you are probably just imaging things hun, or maybe you misunderstood coz your somali is so bad. There are so many Half somalis, and light skin somalis i doubt anyone notices you :rolleyes: :cool: Consider moving to London if they still live in the cave where you are at.

^^^ :eek: :eek: :mad: :rolleyes: Somali's they probably got lost or turned up 4hrs late. That’s what happens when things are rushed/ ill planned. Why was the organiser at home (trying really hard to give him benefit of doubt!)

^^i thought you were going to tell me you were in the army :rolleyes: HE can't be looking out for your interest if he told you make it four especially as you live in the UK, he wanted you in prison or in a mental institute

Don't forget to add YET! give it time and they will emerge, what are you talking about everyone has some sort of limitations, I’m sure if you look hard enough you will spot it!