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Nur

Sharing Scarce Resources ( Somali Husbands)

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^^^What makes a woman think a guy selling his apartment is interested in marriage? Acuudu Bilah. That doesnt even make sense at all.

 

The exasperated youth said: “Such calls are very strange and annoying at the same time."

I have a sneaking suspicion that this "youth" is lying.

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Bro Nur

 

As for Saudia and some other Arab nations it is self inflicted as the govts do not allow their female population to get married to men with different passports.

 

I would advice Sister Hadijah if that was her name to start a single Somali Muslim assos . Cant lie to you but I receive alot of spam from single chrisitan org,trying to hook up single people in the area. wouldnt be a bad idea to educate the youth in Islam, teach them basic skills, get them off Mirax, give them productive courses good enough to get them back to Uni ,Somali youth with sound Islamic knowledge and practise in their lives.

 

 

Its not that I am against Polygamy, I am all for it. But as there are still eligible bachelors around I dont see the reason why I should get into such a relationship. According to a hadith its advisable if to marry to marry an unmarried(virgin) thats what I have in mind so far.

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Brother Nur,

 

I agree with your solution making strategy to ease out the burden of our girls, but I think its better for us to wait another fifteen years to see their position change from the current arrogant stage they are obbssesed in.

 

Somali girls are the best, and I am one of the single males who appreciate to be the descendants of this extremely beautiful human species, but for them to maintain their identity through marrying us, I think they have to grant us the consent to expand the family by marrying those of their likes who happen to be unmarried due to the shortages of somali males. lol

 

Shortage of somali males! this is not a predication, its a reality that exists now. But one thing I know of my personality is that I can't bear with a Somali girl having an affair with a non-somalian. This is not us, this is almost against anything we hold dear, in terms of our culture. Please girls don't ever look for a solution by marrying nin aan Soomaali aheyn, please! hadii kale waa ogtihiin maseer ayaa nagu kacaya halmar :D

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But one thing I know of my personality is that I can't bear with a Somali girl having an affair with a non-somalian.

Look at this. Alle-ubahne, its seems that you are bothered that a somali women has an affair with a nonsomali....but not with the affair itself? Ma waalentahey?

 

Waa run walaahi...alle aad iyo aad baa ugu baahantahey.

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juba   

Originally posted by Alle-ubaahne:

Brother Nur,

 

I their position change from the current arrogant stage they are obbssesed in.

 

 

. But one thing I know of my personality is that I can't bear with a Somali girl having an affair with a non-somalian. This is not us, this is almost against anything we hold dear, in terms of our culture.

what do you mean arrogant stage?

 

Although its best to marry your kind, it is sometimes hard to find them. So what other choice do you have if you can't find the right somali but there are plenty of nice non-somalis? become a celibate?

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raula   

Some of us come from polygamous families. We love our mothers and fathers and hold esteem thier lifestyle choices-even the decision to living in a polygamous relationship. Some of our mothers were probably the 2nd,3rd,4th etc wife-and mindyou had no complains, whether forced, or personally accepted the invitation to marry our fathers.

 

Nowdays though, even for those of us who come from such families-although we hold our mothers and fathers with utmost respect and love-we make excuses for thier chosen lifestyles then. For instance, they do not live in our times(as in generation or current "difficult/demanding" lifestyles in the west), they (our mothers especially) were forced into such marriages by thier parents....etc..u get the point ....excuse and more excuses......BUT WE ACKNOWLEDGE THAT THEIR LIFE TURNED OUT OK/SUCCESSFUL/FULFILLING/HAPPY-except maybe some cases that weren't so merry.

 

My point is-its a reality that exists, and that yes women's population has superseded the mens'. Its been allowed by our mighty Lord(Allah S.W.) for it to be the norm and be practiced by all human kinds. Nevertheless, its been in our cultures from the beginning of times. Therefore, for those who wish to do so-for all reasons, never fear it, indulge into it, and certainly no wrong doing. HOWEVER, DONT BE A BLIND FOOL and not study the situation at hand first before PLUNGING INTO SUCH SITUATION. Always consult family and seek thier decisions-and pray to Allah s.w. that it all goes well.

 

However, I condone how some somali brothers take advantage of the opportunity lightly and create all kind of fiasco in the family later when its very hard to turn back or reverse the situation. It brings shame in our community and ISLAM in general but ALLAH S.W. knows best.

 

Ma'salaama

Raula

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You all remind me of something that had happened to a very close relative of mind. it is a strange story but believe me somali men do such hideous stuffs at times. anyway this relative of mind went for a vacation for weeks in a nother city. her husband who had remained behind had an ongoing affair( i mean shukaansi) with another woman long before she even went on vacation. however miskiinad didn't know what was an folding around her.I also heard that they were very close friend..cajiib close friendkaaga ninkaaga ha kaa xado dhibaato waaye...

anyhow while miskiinad was on vacationing her husband married the other lady and everyone in town heard about it..it become the story of the suuq..

little miskiinad heard the story on phone and couldn't believe it. she took a flight back to her town and boy did the world came crubling on her..i wish she had poured him with a boiling water...naah i don't think is worth risking it and ending up in jail who knows...she would have been more luckier if she was in somalia smile.gif she opted for many things but divorcing him( aah if only women could divorce too icon_razz.gif jk) never came into the option because she had kids..and raising kids alone become for her scarier than accepting a second wife in her husband's life..i bet she put the phrase " for the sake of my children" into action( may be they were other options but uuuuhm..oooh i feel sorry for her now.

 

END OF STORY AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.. :cool:

 

you know what is even more scary to me..how can you live with a man that you don't trust?.."for the sake of your children" a life of a rolling coaster

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Pacifist   

Originally posted by Maymuunah:

You all remind me of something that had happened to a very close relative of mind. it is a strange story but believe me somali men do such hideous stuffs at times. anyway this relative of mind went for a vacation for weeks in a nother city. her husband who had remained behind had an ongoing affair( i mean shukaansi) with another woman long before she even went on vacation. however miskiinad didn't know what was an folding around her.I also heard that they were very close friend..cajiib close friendkaaga ninkaaga ha kaa xado dhibaato waaye...

anyhow while miskiinad was on vacationing her husband married the other lady and everyone in town heard about it..it become the story of the suuq..

little miskiinad heard the story on phone and couldn't believe it. she took a flight back to her town and boy did the world came crubling on her..i wish she had poured him with a boiling water...naah i don't think is worth risking it and ending up in jail who knows...she would have been more luckier if she was in somalia
smile.gif
she opted for many things but divorcing him( aah if only women could divorce too
icon_razz.gif
jk) never came into the option because she had kids..and raising kids alone become for her scarier than accepting a second wife in her husband's life..i bet she put the phrase " for the sake of my children" into action( may be they were other options but uuuuhm..oooh i feel sorry for her now.

 

END OF STORY AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.. :cool:

 

you know what is even more scary to me..how can you live with a man that you don't trust?.."for the sake of your children" a life of a rolling coaster

I think she is one of a He@# mother. She put her childrens needs before hers. I think that is very noble of her. The problem these days is we forget about our children and we become selfish. When you become a parent Me goes out the door. The children come first. Put that man well I wish I was her sister I would go all Gangsta on him and teach him a lesson or Two :D

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My philosophy on this whole issue:

 

Why limit yourself to Somali men who think they can marry more than 1 wife? There are tons of Muslim men out there---good and bad!

 

--so many choices..so little time :)

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Nephissa   

Correction:- There's no Somali Husband shortage(sidii buunsho oo kale ayay meelaha dhooban yihiin.) Educated, god fearing ,respectable men are hard to find, and any girl who finds one should share with :D the rest.

 

Non Somalis are not an option for some of us. A freind of a friend went on Islam online dating services and ended up marrying muslim black man. After being married for only few days, she run for her life and is in hideout. As Wiilo would say GO FIGURE!

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Bess.   

bishaaro for ur sake i hope ur kidding.....share.... :rolleyes: like that is ever going to happen.... ;) ....i would suggest u find one for urself....or were u planning on taking one away from his wife and kids? :confused:

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Nur   

Girls

 

Why is it so difficult to visualize a family made of four great wives and a wonderful husband? just imagine the four sitting together in their living room, sharing quite time together, or having an enriching intellectual discussion, their kids around them, doing their homework, wives purusing their hobbies and interests while husband is always cared for and at least each woman knows where her husband is at any given moment?

 

This way, when good people breed good kids, next generation girls will not have the same problem of imbalance of eligible bachelors.

 

Nur

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