Somaliland Activity Guide Thread 2011

[Alpha Blondy]

 

since the start of this year i've been in a relationship. i'm hoping this 'relationship' would be the launch-pad for my long term social union, in other words 'marriage'. my new girlfriend is a stunner. she's incredibly good-looking and has a fantastic personality. she's great to be around and always makes me feel special. this relationship started on NYE 2011. i've known this chick since September 2011, but haven't really had the 'opportunity' to make my move. on NYE, i organised a party and set out my intentions to her. she accepted after much chemistry between us. now, we speak on our 'SOMTEL' line, which is free from 6pm to 6am. she is from dire dawa and i'm not sure how long we've got together but i'm happy and thats all that matters, i guess....

 

even the love calculator seems to agree with this 'one', with an approval rating of 87%. that's quite high.

[Alpha Blondy]

Alpha Blondy;718306 wrote:

 

This is where I have at least one of my meals a day. Its local and has a family feel to it. Its owned by my honorary uncle (Aftax). I'm treated like a celebrity in this fabulous eatery.

it is with sad regret to announce to the dedicated and regular readers of my exploits in somalialiland lol that AFTAX has tahribbed to Benghazi, libya. this foolish man sold two businesses and decided to escape somaliland WTF. i dont know why people do these things. i recently spoke to sacid, who was the cook at AFTAX's and he said that Aftax was first arrested in sudan and served some time in jail there but is now in Benghazi, also behind bars. you'd think he would have made it to elsewhere but libya??? for goodness sake, these people are so deluded and confused.

[Carafaat]

Alpha Blondy;778361 wrote:

 

since the start of this year i've been in a relationship. i'm hoping this 'relationship' would be the launch-pad for my long term social union, in other words 'marriage'. my new girlfriend is a stunner. she's incredibly good-looking and has a fantastic personality. she's great to be around and always makes me feel special. this relationship started on NYE 2011. i've known this chick since September 2011, but haven't really had the 'opportunity' to make my move. on NYE, i organised a party and set out my intentions to her. she accepted after much chemistry between us. now, we speak on our 'SOMTEL' line, which is free from 6pm to 6am. she is from dire dawa and i'm not sure how long we've got together but i'm happy and thats all that matters, i guess....

 

even the love calculator seems to agree with this 'one', with an approval rating of 87%. that's quite high.

 

Inadeer Diredawa aa?? war iska ilaali. kuwaasi sixirka ayee yaqanaan. dont eat anything they give you.

[Alpha Blondy]

arafat, don't be ridiculous. as a rule, i don't eat anything anyone gives me. i also keep a turkish evil eye pendant at my house to ward off evil spirits.

 

[Carafaat]

Alpha,

 

I have decided I will spend my holiday this summer in Hargeysa. Will you welcome me in Hargeysa and throw one of those famous elite parties on my behalf?

[Alpha Blondy]

 

sleaze, or put mildly a good opportunity to make money is a traditional past time of Somaliland. there is almost a subterranean underbelly to it. i suppose this is in part due to the its tolerance and the savvy individuals involved appetite for it. all over the country secret deals are being sealed and handshakes revel in their 'done deals'. over the past few weeks, I’ve been solicited for bribes to ensure that all is 'done'. i usually tolerate such advances with polite ambivalence, neither accepting or refusing such lucrative offers. i mean why shouldn’t I ? that’s what often runs through my mind, then i remember the famous story my good friend hashi told me.

 

there are two students, a somali and the other Filipino. both studied together sometime in the US during 1980s. they both represented the brightest for each country. few years later, the Filipino invites the Somali with the hope of impressing his friend with his new found success and position in society.

 

several years later, the somali extends a warm invite to his friend. the Filipino is in awe of the Somali’s success. he probes and asks questions.the Somali gladly tells his friend the source of his lavish and successful life. he takes the Filipino outside one of the mansion’s veranda and tell him ' you see that road?' the Filipino responds ' what road?'

 

looooooooooooooooooool. Kills me everytime! Classic stuff.

 

The morale of the story is ‘waxna cun, waxna qabo’ somaha? but in somaliland’s case this is unlikely and all they do is eat without planning for what tomorrow brings!

[BN]

Interesting discussion.

 

I've got a couple of questions:

 

1. Archdemos and Ibti: Can I ask what you do/did for employment? How are prospects for those who from abroad? What is the range do NGO salaries, and does it include housing?

2. How many construction companies are there? And how easy is it to build a house by hiring staff yourself and buying supplies? The only expensive staffer should be the designer/engineer.

[Alpha Blondy]

 

i've been dreading my family coming to visit for the last three months. don't you just hate it when a close family member makes a unilateral decision without ever consulting you or taking into consideration your thoughts of their intrusion and decide ''hey, i know what? i'm going to visit Alpha in his palace becos i think he'd like that very much''. the truth is i don't want them here and never have. all disclaimers aside i'm now resigned to the fact that things will never be the same again so long as these 'intruders' stay and make themselves very comfortable in my life and house. I've reveled in my freedom and personal loneliness for the best part of almost 2 years but yesterday the first tranche of family came through lol. already I've been forced to make several sacrifices including my 'personal' freedom and laissez faire lifestyle and so much more. i'm not sure if i can or will tolerate such sacrifices or for how long. its feels like deja vu already and i'm seeing the same pattern of behaviour that drove me to depression. you see my family isn't like the average dysfunctional Somali family. we are very moral and live under a regimented paradigm of virtue. the threshold and standards of behaviour expected are too high.

 

wish me luck, the somaliland dream is officially over and i think i'll leave before they leave walahi.

[Tallaabo]

Chimera;833152 wrote:

This picture just oozes degeneration and anti-productiveness.

 

Khat should be banned from all of the major economic hubs in the Somali peninsula.

Could not have said it better. This is the perfect portrait of laziness, caajis, yawning, unemployment, shaxaad, parental neglect, marriage crisis, falling out teeth, green mouth, mental disorder, delusions, and outright uselessness. That awful drug must be banned at least in the West.

[Mukulaalow]

Tallaabo;847025 wrote:

Could not have said it better. This is the perfect portrait of laziness, caajis, yawning, unemployment, shaxaad, parental neglect, marriage crisis, falling out teeth, green mouth, mental disorder, delusions, and outright uselessness. That awful drug must be banned at least in the West.

you just said it better.

[Carafaat]

Alpha Blondy;847018 wrote:

 

i've been dreading my family coming to visit for the last three months. don't you just hate it when a close family member makes a unilateral decision without ever consulting you or taking into consideration your thoughts of their intrusion and decide ''hey, i know what? i'm going to visit Alpha in his palace becos i think he'd like that very much''. the truth is i don't want them here and never have. all disclaimers aside i'm now resigned to the fact that things will never be the same again so long as these 'intruders' stay and make themselves very comfortable in my life and house. I've reveled in my freedom and personal loneliness for the best part of almost 2 years but yesterday the first tranche of family came through lol. already I've been forced to make several sacrifices including my 'personal' freedom and laissez faire lifestyle and so much more. i'm not sure if i can or will tolerate such sacrifices or for how long. its feels like deja vu already and i'm seeing the same pattern of behaviour that drove me to depression. you see my family isn't like the average dysfunctional Somali family. we are very moral and live under a regimented paradigm of virtue. the threshold and standards of behaviour expected are too high.

 

wish me luck, the somaliland dream is officially over and i think i'll leave before they leave walahi.

You just desribed the average Somali family.

 

So do you wake up for Salaat Subax nowadays, with the family around and so?

[Alpha Blondy]

 

Milan, Paris and Hargeisa!

 

clothes! clothes! clothes! are the range this season particularly during this most festive period. at 8:30HCT, my cousin who studied and spent 8 years in Malaysia (not sure if he qualifies as a QURBO-JOOG) and whose new acquired tastes have developed to new sizzling heights was demanding $120.00 from me. presumably, the money was to be spent on new clothes and activities during the big day in Berbera. since his return to this oblivion, i suspect he feels terrible partly because the guilt of having cost his family close to 80K. the man is completely and utterly delusional walahi. its pathetic and laughable. he must fix up immediately and stop living this play-boy lifestyle.

 

since making my final return back to the homeland almost 2 and half years ago, i've been very cautious and often receptive to appeasing the popular mood, appearing inconspicuous and ordinary. i've always felt its important to strike a fine balance between maintaining appearances and not looking trashy in a 86-zipped, new-age and thai made jeans, often worn by the daqan aan dorfin lot. and yet just as quality and value go hand in hand, i feel its important to get the best possible deals and bargins. whenever i go shopping, i usually go to the souq hoose and buy WHO-DIED 2nd hand charity clothes from aboard. there are some real gems among all that trash, some in near perfect condition. reer somaliland rarely shop in these out-door shacks and tarpaulins, preferring instead brand new imports. i never understand how the local people can walk past the shops and never think twice about shopping there. i think i'll treat myself to a almost brand new designer blazer this eid. after haggling i'll get it for $3... for sure.

[Alpha Blondy]

 

 

my eldest brother who is 35 and the oldest of 7 including myself has decided to put several sanctions on me. this is his first outing in somaliland, having left somaliland as a teenager and war child.

 

who does he think he is? this man is pathetic!

 

it was over the eid holidays he unilaterally decided the time has come for him to launch his long term vision - isolation and prudent economic policy lol. these include no close and personal friends/members of somaliland elite and guests of highest calibre to come the house. observing a period of joint-solitude and no links with the outside world including family, no conspicuous spending, no eating out in fancy restaurants - he will cook with his 'barehands', no maid and that all are responsible for cleaning their rooms and communal area cleaning is to be divided equally.

 

you could say these draconian measures are a result of his failures to grapple with the harsh realities of somaliland. i gave him a briefing and the best possible advise. he didnt listen and now he is making us pay for his shortcoming. very soon we'll come to blows. he is my elder and brother and up-until-now i've been deferential and patient. last night i spoke to my mum and she said she will speak to him. my bro is a bully. i'm deeply upset by these sanctions and its evoked a childhood dominated by his intimidation and beatings. he use to turn the TV off at 6pm and made us perform spellings/ precise definitions from the dictionary lol. this man is an egomaniac and self confessed narcissistic. its his way or the highway. i'm deeply upset by his behaviour towards me! what did I do to deserve these sanctions baal?