The funny news of the day!

[MR ORGILAQE]

After all, F**king has existed for 800 years, probably when a Mr F**k or the F**k family moved into the area. The 'ing' was added as a word for settlement."

 

Very funny Suldanka

 

Residents of two other Austrian communities, Windpassing and W**k on the Lake, suffered a similar reluctance, he added.

[STOIC]

Is it a bad joke When a credit card solicitor adresses you as a terorist!.where are the conspiracy therapist?

 

PS: Please do not beleive what i post here unless it is consistent with what you already know! .

 

Dear Palestinian Bomber

[Janna]

The funniest thing I heard today was how a Phd student who attends Monash Univeristy was intending to write a piece on "Terrorism". He borrowed so many books on terrorism etc. And the Libaraian reported him to ASIO, believing he was participating in terrorism activites. What can I say? Australia has a phobia of terrorism.

[MR ORGILAQE]

The funny thing that i was reminded was by a former classmate of mine back in Mombasa.There was a LUO guy who was transfered to our class once and he was really dark.I mean darker than the darkest night.The only thing you could see were his teeth.

The swahilis in mombasa being their usual self they started teasing him as soon as he walked in

one yelling

"washa Taa" meaning the couldnt see the guy

"mtu mzima ameingia" meaning he is as was born(not circumcised)

[STOIC]

Aug. 23, 2005 — Annie Clayton believes husbands can learn a lot from dogs.

 

"I have been training dogs for 20 years but I have been married a whole lot longer and I firmly believe you can train your husband like a dog because they both learn in the same way," Clayton said. "I am living proof it works. I haven't washed a dish in years."

Clayton is the host of a controversial British reality show called, "Bring Your Husband to Heel," which promises wives the chance to teach old husbands new tricks.

 

Margaret and John Elliot, the show's first husband and wife/master and student contestants, have been married for 37 years.

 

"I spend most of my life tidying up after him," Margaret Elliot said.

 

John Elliot said the tone of his wife's nagging stopped him from pitching in more.

 

"It's the way she says 'John' that really bites into my bones," he said.

 

Clayton advised the couple it's all about throwing bones; more good dog than sit and stay.

 

"You're going to ignore what you don't want anymore," Clayton told Margaret Elliot on the show. "Replace that behavior you don't want with something that you do want, which is helping you with the dishes, which you must reward each tiny, tiny little increment towards the whole."

 

On the show, Margaret Elliot practiced on a real dog first. Then, with hidden cameras recording every moment, she put the formula to the test on her husband.

 

And it worked!

 

"I think most husbands have fairly predictable behavior patterns," said Daisy Goodwin, creator of "Bring Your Husband to Heel." "My husband certainly works on a very simple pleasure principle.

 

"Husband can be traineed like Dogs

 

 

PS: Please Do not beleive what i post here unless it is consistent with what you already know!

[Castro]

Originally posted by STOIC:

"Bring Your Husband to Heel." "My husband certainly works on a very simple pleasure principle."

That is fascinating. For years, if not decades, men have been calling each other dawg, and lovingly mind you. Hey dawg, pass me the remote. What up dawg, how's it hangin'? Check this out dawg! It didn't take very long for women to figure out it wasn't just a term of endearment. These dawgs have been calling each other by their real names.

 

Dogs are loyal, granted, but there are some wild dogs out there. And some dogs are only interested in b!tches. You know, female dogs. So don't try this training class at home. That lady who started the course had her self a chihuahua for a husband. Some of us are Dobermen, Pit Bulls or Rottweilers.

 

Wuuf Wuuf.

[- Femme -]

^Being called a dog isnt something to smile about. Neither is 'nigger' 'qumayo' 'b!tch' or any other degrading label.

 

That is the most disgusting show of arrogance and selfishness I have ever seen. It amazes me that the woman is so proud & gets off humiliating her husband....that she offers classes. I have to say though... her husband is a wimp who deserves every inch of disrespect he's getting.

 

Triple uff.

 

P.S. I saw her on oprah. Apparently alot of women relate to her.

[nafta]

Tourists halt flight over "long" toilet trip

NICOSIA (Reuters) - Frightened British tourists stopped an airliner taking off from Cyprus on Sunday night after a Muslim passenger triggered a security scare by spending too long in the toilet.

 

Passengers in an uproar forced the plane to turn back while it was taxiing for take off to Manchester. There were 230 people on the plane operated by private carrier XLA.

 

"The appearance and behaviour of two individuals roused suspicion and then the pilot refused to continue with them after the reaction from the other passengers," police spokesman Demetris Demetriou said.

 

State radio reported they were Pakistani in origin.

 

"All I saw was a couple of Arab looking gents with white skullcaps. What became suspicious is one went to the toilet and went for a long time. He was in the loo for about 10 minutes," one British passenger who identified himself only as Chris, 45, told journalists.

 

Demetriou said the men were questioned and nothing was found against them. The luggage of the aircraft was also checked and nothing suspicious found.

 

The flight left Cyprus on Monday, without the two passengers, who departed on a different aircraft, police said.

 

Source

 

I do not know whether I should roll my eyes, pull an embarrassed face, get angry or laugh. I'll do all of them instead :rolleyes: :mad:

[STOIC]

British woman marries a dolphin?.........what in the loving hell is that? Check out this woman whose ("i do" )words may have captured the ears of people

 

 

With this herring I thee wed

British woman ‘marries’ dolphin, tying the net after 15-year courtship

Marry a dolphin? only a British can do that!

[Arawella]

Marrying a dolphin is more rationale than marrying a dog or donkey which was the case in America. Therefore the Americans definitely beat the British in the fetish department.

[STOIC]

 

Do you happen to notice any resemblance in here? Sometimes i think life should grab you by the horn and force you to parade infront of the mighty mirror and check yourself if you could resemble your favorite pet

 

PS I would not pass over a date with her though...in her own words "thats hot"

 

PSS I know that is not the pet she carries around

[STOIC]

Britney driving a baby on her lap....isn't it wonderful how smart our celebrities are? Hmmmmmmmmmm

 

 

 

[STOIC]

This week, the President and CEO of Radio shack resigned after he was busted for lying on his Resume.He wrote on his resume that he graduated from college which was found out to be baloney. Seriously if you want to lie, then make sure you say something that can resemble a lie( Been hataat shegeyso, wax ruun ueeg sheeg ).

 

 

 

Sources

[STOIC]

This has to be the funny news of the day......Read on

 

 

 

 

Joshua Williams giving court-ordered apology to eagle after being convicted of endangered species harrassment.

 

 

(Sioux Falls, SD) A peaceful Sunday of fishing turned sour for Josh Williams recently. The problems started when Mr. Williams hooked a nice smallmouth bass, and a bald eagle took notice. While the eagle swooped in, attempting to catch the bass in its talons, Mr. Williams was observed by a Fish and Wildlife Service officer trying to scare the eagle away by throwing stones at it.

 

The FWS officer testified in U.S. District Court of South Dakota that Mr. Williams had clearly violated one of the Endangered Species Act's prohibited activities that specifically makes it illegal to "...harass....an endangered or threatened species without a permit from the Secretary of the Department of the Interior."

 

The judge agreed, finding the man guilty of a misdemeanor violation of the Act. The judge was lenient in sentencing, however, requiring only that the man apologize to the eagle. Mr. Williams expressed remorse, stating that the eagle would be welcome to help him fish anytime it wanted to. The eagle had no comment.

 

Breaking News: After Katrina: Vatican Sued for 'Acts of God'

 

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[STOIC]