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genius pauper.

marriage while schooling!!

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Nina Fox   
Naah man, I aint a superwoman lool. Seeing married couples barely getting by have scarred me for life. I aint even going to attempt multi-tasking. Kuddos to those who do it, but Im frightened @ the thought. Perhaps if I were back in Africa, with 2-3 maids, a chef, driver and a gardner. :)

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oH!! i was told you don't need to be superwomen. even the simple one's can. it is the courage and the commitment that matter.

 

the dream life in Africa is perfect but many miss it. by the way, what makes you frightened with the thought????? may be an experience?lol. dont know

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since marriage has got more impact on the women than men, they have got to, at least go the extra mile in knowing who the real man is. this is only possible by getting back to his family and not friends.

a family member who knows the man well, is the right person to turn to.

that information will be a treasure either to retreat or go on with the plan.

 

the character is mainly gauged by anger and not eloquence in speech. though the latter is what most women depend on.

equally important, there's a very big difference between a man being religious and being good natured(xusnul khuluq). the two are mutually independent, albeit they can be together.

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the biggest mistake some make is, the idea of courtship. while at higher education, some gentlemen befriend girls in the name of 'girlfriend' 'boyfriend' relationship and if asked what they are up to, ''future potential wife-husband'' wont escape your ears. this kind of a relationship is bound to fail in entirety simply because, it doesn't hold any ethical support. here am implying that, a friendship is a lethal mental poison for the youngsters

for a relationship to be a successful, it should be based on one thing and just one thing. and that is, the sincere intention of marriage, packed with at least the means; however little that is.

 

p.s. for campus girls: did you noticed that some men a womanisers, hanging around with almost every girl, cracking in jokes supplemented with a loud laughter??

some of them,made the clever girl drop out of the uni just because they were so nice to her.

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the best traits to look for in the right man that can make a good husband are:

 

1)xusnul khuluq( good natured) however broad the character traits are, the litmus test for best character, squarely lies within the frame of anger and tolerance.

you can say with ease, so and so is a good person just by knowing him being a simple man who controls his anger .

hintthis can be deduced from the kind of relation fibre that exists between him and his close family relatives. if a man is disobedient to his parents, there are minimal chances he will be obedient to you.

2) knowledgeable the man should at least know some portions of the diin and practise the little he knows.(the secular education is but a secondary) better a man who knows little and practises that which he knows than a very educated fellow who practises not what he knows.

 

i shall say more insha allah

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3) what he does in life to gain sustenance. this will put in perspective whether he can support you economically. definitely his source of income must halal. however, this doesn't in any way mean, he should be so wealthy. just enough amount to push you through your daily bread is fine. if he has more wealth, with good character and knowledgeable, then your lucky.

 

4)his insights and views about the most paramount principles of life. what are his views about divorce, children, marriage, parents, and many more. this will put in focus his inner humble opinions pertaining to essentials of life.

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hey solers lets make sure this pretty girld in sol lead a lively life.

An educated girl, not all but some, qab weeynida haiska deeyeen. Am told, caadi ma ahan.

ladies should be rendered queens in the household.

If your mom iyo xaaska eey is qabtaan, dont rush to rid the lady. Be calm and seek islaax

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hey solers lets make sure this pretty girls in sol lead a lively life.

An educated girl, not all but some, qab weeynida haiska deeyeen. Am told, caadi ma ahan.

ladies should be rendered queens in the household.

If your mom iyo xaaska eey is qabtaan, dont rush to rid the lady. Be calm and seek islaax

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Malika   

^Ah! the beauty of youth - one always assumes that life is eternal. I say live and let life be lived...time awaits no man!

 

People take life far too serious.

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Ms MoOns   

Just a quick question. Didn't wanna open a whole new topic for it:

 

When you've done a guur doon, is it necessary to do the nikaax right after?

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STOIC   

^ If you are planning to do wedding within the next two months then you really don't have to do nikkah right after you ask for the girl's hand.Now the situation maybe different if there is a gap year between the wedding and when you ask for her hand....You should just do the nikkah right away if there will be a long time between the wedding planning and actual wedding date.This will give you more access to the girl's family if you did the nikkah...It doesn't look right to be hanging with the in-laws if you haven't done the nikkah..Its a NO NO in Somali daqhaan.....

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Aaliyyah   

Ms Moon I think stoic gave you some legit answer. But, I personally never understood people who do nikaax and then have a wedding year later..it is like u got married a year ago maxaad isla dhibi oo aroos weyn ka dhigi..u either have a wedding right away or you forget abt it..bt thats my opinion so each on his own..

 

I careless about the dhaqan but hanging out with a guy for a long time is islamically not valid (even though I always say u need to date the dude a year before u marry him the truth is ..where a guy and a girl are alone the third is sheydan as the prophet csw said so it is better to get married sooner but then again u are taking a risk given that u dnt know him too well..hadana to be honest u never know anyone too well i know ppl who dated forever hadana wali guursaneen it becomes a way of life dating this farah and then moving on to another lmao..never ending cycle)

 

my 2 cents!

 

salaam

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