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NGONGE

A Thug’s tale

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dawoco   

Alla hooyooy,,,,,,,,,,

hahahahahahahhahahha

hahahahahahhahahahha

hahahahahhahahahahha

kixkixkixkixkixkix

kixkixkixkixkix.

 

I don't remember laughing that hard, oh my! Saan u dhiq dhiqleeyhaaye hooyadeey aa ila yaabtay.

 

Is it too late to joun the "i love rudeboy" fanclub?

 

Ngonge, when u killed rudeboy, sida aad u gashay aan kuu gali lahaa, many a mindfields would have been around ur area huunno :D

 

Checkmate, kaaskop foowgal kaaskop nooh icon_razz.gif

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N.O.R.F   

Phew that was a marathon, been missing out on Rudeboy and his escapades,,,looooool, damn you got jokes :D:D

 

Looks like rude boy is getting more and more confident back home ey,,,,

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NGONGE   

This Evening, Rudeboy got dressed and left to join his friends. They were going to a wedding. When they got there, Rudeboy noticed that everyone was dressed in their best clothes! He turns round to Stockholm and says:

 

What’s wrong wid dese people, blud? Look at all a dem mans wearing suits and shiny shoes! It’s as if dey all going to court, blud. Everybody knows dat the best ting to wear when you go to a wedding is a FUBU top and a Versace jeans, ya get me?

Still, da girls look hot, blud, I’s love to burn my fingers on one a dem, ya get me?

 

They walk in and stand to the side of the band, scanning the whole place. Dhul-Dhaqaaqi points out a young and chubby 12-year-old girl wearing a red bacweene style Dirac and keeps repeating “ eesh cala xabbat el luus, beleedh, eesh cala xabbat el luus”. Rudeboy turns on him and says:

 

You is a child molester, blud. Why are you eyeing up a little 12-year-old girl for, man? We’s all a whole five-year-older than her, blud. You should check out the 16 year old malxeesad instead, star. She’s the biz, ya get me? Plus, I’s know dat you like your women to have enough heleb on dem, ya get me? Dat malxeesad is da size of tree goats, bro, tree big goats, na’mean?

 

Stockholm beckons the boys to join him in watching the old women do the ceyaar Somali and stands there nodding his head and screaming “shake dat *** , big momma, shake dat *** ”. Rudeboy, pulls a face and says:

You is gross, blud, go ROSS. What is wrong wid you people? You all sick today or somethin? One of you wants to get busy wid a young girl yeah and da oder one is ogling eslaamo! At least Cali Ceyaal is not checking out any women and is bothering the keyboard player instead. Man tinks he can sing, ya get me?

 

The guys stand watching the ceyar Somali, some staring in happiness while others are looking in disgust. Suddenly, a couple of young girls join the dancing circle and start jumping about to the beat. The boys all scream at once “ shake dat badhi badhi, shake dat badhi badhi” and start moving closer into the inner circle. A couple of old women push Rudeboy and Stockholm into the middle of the circle to dance with the girls. Rudeboy freezes, looks at the jumping girl in front of him and apes her movements slowly. He looks around at Stockholm to see if he’s doing the same thing but notices that his cosmopolitan friend has a different dance in mind! Stockholm keeps jumping and dancing around his “partner” and every time he finds (or rather positions) himself behind her, he tries to turn it into a whine. Cali Ceyal leaves the keyboard player and comes to watch his friends dancing. He sees what Stockholm is trying to do and he mischievously starts shouting “ arr tiiriye gabadha ka qabta”. The girl hears him and runs out of the circle taking her friend with her. Rudeboy withdraws too and sits exhausted on a chair in the corner. He feels a tap on his shoulder and when he turns round to look, he breaks into a huge idiotic smile. Farax smiles back at him and says “ Hi Abdi”. Rudeboy mumbles, stutters and then trying to act cool and hoping that she will not notice that he’s starting to shake, says:

 

Aight, Farax. I’s didn’t tink you Holland girls likes to go to aroosyo, blud!

She tells him that she likes weddings and even though she hardly knows anyone in this wedding she was still determined to come and check it out. Rudeboy nods his head and says, “seen seen” to everything she’s saying while trying very hard to think of something interesting to say. She stops talking, Rudeboy stops talking. They sit staring at each other when the keyboard player starts playing a popular catchy song. Rudeboy says:

Dis is a great tune, init? How’s about you and me get up and dance yeah? I’s never been inside of a nightclub but I’s been to a few house parties when I’s went to visit my cousin in Manchester. I’s a great dancer, ya get me? So, what you sayin? Wanna jeesto? Farax tells him that she’s tired from all the dancing she already did and that she’s thinking of going home but her cousins don’t want to go. Rudeboy tells her that it’s “cool” and that he didn’t really want to dance anyway. He sits there thinking of something to say while wiping the fluff of his FUBU top. He looks up at her and says:

But why do you want to go home, blud? Da night is still young yeah..lets just sit and talk and get to know more about each uder, ya get me? Before he could stop himself or hide his excitement he blurts out:

I’s tell you what I’s gonna do, blud. I’s gonna walk you home yeah and you’s can tell me everythin about you and Holland yeah!

She tells him that it’s very dark outside and that she doesn’t want him to get lost on his way back after walking her home. Rudeboy replies:

I’s not a little child to get lost, blud. I’s a original thug, ya get me? I’s never get lost. Plus, even if I’s got lost in da dark, it’s a nice weather outside and I’s can sleep anywhere. I’s not scared of no waraabe or dacawo, ya get me?

 

On their way out of the wedding, Stockholm shout out to Rudeboy “you da man, blud, you da man. Give her a good kiss from me, blud ya get me?”. Rudeboy growls back at him and quickens his step to catch up with Farax.....

 

 

Da plot tikens, blud icon_razz.gif

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Juxa   

Ngonge-gaabow, i really laughed so hard my shaash left my afro. more macawis to you.

 

btw, this is actually educating beside being entertaining, u are addressing problems of today's youth and the increasing need of dhaqan-celin ;)

 

i would like to nominate couple of nomads who qualify as desperately in need of re-rooting also know as dhaqan-celin/rehabilitating programme.

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OG_Girl   

how is that the girls name is farax,its that a masculine name?

lol is not Faarax, is farah or farax means happness.

 

hey 7rami walla Raami keep on , I am enjoying reading it.

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Tuujiye   

phil is a girls name?.............cajabtul ladii..

 

Juxaa aan la yaabnaa hadana phil maa ku darsamay..

 

tuujiska ii sii wada..

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Juxa   

^^^^^^^^^yaab tire waa ilaahay, adoo yaaban aa nafta hah lagaa siinaa :rolleyes:

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PhiL   

Phil is a girl's name. To those inquiring, it means 'of radiant beauty that can be seen from the top of Mount Olympus' . That or , it could be short for Phillip. ;) Give or take, am cool with either one. smile.gif

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NGONGE   

Today Rudeboy was sitting in the Maqaaxi with his boys and playing Torob. His mind was not on the game and Stockholm was getting irritated. Stockholm says to him:

 

Yo, blud you got to concentrate on da game, man! I knows you can play better dan dis, fix up blud, fix up. Rudeboy gets all defensive and says:

 

Why you stressing, blud? It’s only a game of torob, ya get me? Dese boys are on fire today, blud. I’s doing my best to win but dey is playin a great game, blud. Stockholm laughs and says : dese boys are rubbish blud and you knows it. Your mind is not on da game blud, you tinking of dat gal again, blud! I sees you looking at your watch every five minute, man. Rudeboy replies:

What gal blud? You tink a little gal can run my life, star? I’s got no time for no girls, ya get me? You my boys blud, you my boys. Gals are fun to be wid and all dat but when I’s wid my boys, I’s wid my boys, yeah?

Listen blood, I’s tell you a story Xaaji Abokor told me yeah! He said dat back in da days when dem dumar used to cook Conto for all dem mans, dey never got to eat anyting until the mans have finished eating blud! Can you imagine dat, blud? Dey got to eat the Hambo, star! Leftovers like a bisad, blud! I’s told Xaaji Abokor dat it was wrong to expect women to eat my habmo but he’s told me dat it was ok, blud! He’s said dat da women did not mind! When I’s heard dat story I’s was tinking how cheap it was to take a girl on a date blood. Imagine taking her to MacDonald’s or somethin yeah, and you order one Big Mac Meal yeah, you eat first and when you is full, she eats, blud! I’s don’t know if I’s can do dat though. I’s know dat men and women is not equal but dis here story is cruel, blud. So, what I’s tryin to tell you is dat I’s put my boys and bredrins before any woman dem but I’s never aks a woman to eat my leftovers, ya get me?

 

Stockholm nods and asks him if he likes the girl or not. Rudeboy replies:

 

I’s gonna be on da level wid you now, blud. If you tink I’s gone soft or anyting, just allow it yeah, allow it. I’m feelin her, blud. She’s buff. But she only a girl, blud. I’s not gonna marry her or anyting like dat. But I’s like being around her and she’s clever blud. She’s clever you know. Dem Holland gal all clever, blud. Dey speak so many languages I’s don’t know how all dat stuff fit in dier pretty heads, ya get me? I’s gonna meet her later on by Xaaji Abokor’s Birkaad, you wanna come so I can hook you up wid her girl? She’s buff too you know. Stockholm declines the invitation and tells him that he’s more than happy with his own Jaat girls. Rudeboy looks at the other two boys and then decides that it’s best if he doesn’t invite either of them to join him. He puts his cards down and gets up telling the boys it’s time he got on his way to his date.

 

An hour later, Rudeboy is standing by the birkaad waiting for Farax and wondering why she’s late. He starts getting paranoid and thinking maybe Stockholm had spoken to her and told her about their earlier conversation. He starts thinking of excuses to explain why he told Stockholm that she’s not really that important and that he’s only wasting his time with her. While he was standing there kicking the sand and lost in his thoughts, Farax sneaks up on him and tabs him on the shoulders. He jumps up startled and takes a swing at her that narrowly misses her, shouting “who dat, who dat?” Farax looks at him with a shocked look on her face and starts walking away. He chases her and grabs hold of her arm. She stops and turns round and looks at him. In his panic, he tries to explain to her that he’s a thug and “ you don’t sneak up on a thug like dat unless you have a death wish, ya get me?” Farax still stares at him without uttering a word. He panics even more and starts saying:

Listen Farax yeah, listen. I’s didn’t mean to hit you and I’s didn’t know it was you sneaking up on me. I’s like you gal and would never dream of hurting one little Timo on your body, ya get me? Dis was just a reflex action, ya get me? Just a reflex action. Like when you sitting under a Geed and a Caaro falls on your head, you jump and wipe it off, right? I’s done da same. Naah, naah baby gal, I’s not calling you a caaro, blud. Dat was just a example, ya get me? Amyways, calm down now and come and sit down yeah. We’s got a lot to talk about, ya get me. Don’t tell dis to my boys but I’s have a better time when I’s wid you den when I’s wid dem. I’s no playa or anyting but I’s like your company. For real, blud, for real. I’s like talking to you and listening to your broken Somali. Yeah, yeah, I’s know my Somali is not perfect eider but still, I’s find yours real sweet, ya get me. Finally, Farax breaks into a smile and starts laughing about how clumsy he is. Rudeboy tries to tell her that he’s not clumsy and that the reflex action was a result of his natural “Thug” tendencies. “ When I’m wid you I’s not a thug, I’s gonna be a butterfly, huuno malab”.

 

 

Today, I’m more bored than usual. Well, at least I only have 45 minutes to go. :D

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