Salaam The idea of multiculturalism is commendable and it rarely works. I was thinking the other day of this country (UK). Most of the indigenous population has moved to the suburbs. Some commute to London. London is the most cosmopolitan city in the world. Now that many European countries are being allowed into the EU, already the indigenous population are complaining about. According to the BBC, Nearly 600,000 people have come to the UK from the 10 countries which joined the European Union in 2004 and more are expected after the entrence of more countries (Bulgarians and Romanians within 5months) . SOme argue that it is another 600,000 people entitled to benefits,schools and a free health service not to mention low paid jobs, which incidently the employers are happy with(More wage slaves for big business to exploit, and more power given to them to pay even lower wages to those already here), unlike the mortgage paying British person. I am digressing here, but the point i am making is: If we were in Somalia, would we be willing to open our doors to anyone Tom, Dick and Harry? I dont think so. Sometimes i do understand where the nationalist parties are coming from. Having said this, I am glad that this country has kindly open its doors for Somali refugees where no other 'muslim' governemt has not afforded us the same treatment.

Salaam Aleykum I think the topic starter has placed so much confidence in himself with regards to choosing the right thing. Where does what Allah chose for us come in that long list? I know we are given a choice to either believe or not to. We are also given an Aqal to make the right choice. The comment "I choose to live in America because of its crucial believe in democracy." I nearly choked in my coffee. Patriotic Act mean anything to you? What choice do you have but to choose what America wants?

Originally posted by JUSTICE: You all taking the subject into nowhere. I meant from the begining that most somali men I've heard of are mistreating their wives. Money is part of the issue but not the main one. There is a culture in somali society of treating women as second class citizens. Are you kidding me? Speaking as a woman, i find that you saying the 'most somali men mistreat their wives' offensive. What kind of people do you know? Can i suggest that you change the kind of people you socialise with. Every Somali women is queen of her home and the men that mistreat their women are minority. The fact you say "that there is a culture in somali society of treating women as second class citizens" is very much off the mark. I am proud to say that we are the only minority in this western country that dont mistreat our wives and women. Your remark above is what i would read from Rupert Murdoch and his rag of filth right wing papers. Totally untrue.

Being in Qurba, our faith is constantly challenged. One can not escape from these constant questioning and challenges in Islam. Which is why muslims need to educate themselves in their deen and strengthen their eemaan. It is very easy to be athiest or christian in these countries and people do become those. So as muslims we have to learn our deen in order to defend it from Islamaphobes and also the muslim extremists (those who blow up trains) in our midst.

Assaalamu aleykum Many to reply to: Here we go: Mr.Faarax The masjids cater for all muslims and not just somalis. I know for a fact that sisters are openminded to put themselves on the masjid list but the propblem with this is that not many somali men register. S.O.S "it's the responsibility of the family and relatives of the sister, and to be precise, it's the sole responsibility of her mahrems to find her a suitable husband." I agree with this but it doesnt translate into reality in our community unlike the Asians. TenaciousSoul "y cant we be happy being single" Islam considers marriage as one of the most virtuous and approved institutions. Can i remind you the hadith of the Messenger of Allah (saw). The Messenger of Allah (saw) declared, "There is no monasticism in Islam." He further ordained: "O you young men! Whoever is able to marry should marry, for that will help him to lower his gaze and guard his modesty." (Al-Bukhari) Marriage in Islam is important for the functioning of the family so that both spouses can live together in love, security, and tranquility. Divorce is hated by Allah. Therefore we need to put our trust in Allah and choose our partners wisely. Nothing is smooth in life so the art of compromising is necessary. rudy "cambarro u aint looking for true somali dude! why front!.....how come every xalimo who utters these words has an undercover agenda to marry a loser foreigner" I am happily married to a somali brother Alhamdulilaah. I honestly feel that a somali men would understand a somali women and vice versa. Many ladies who married to non-somalis told me themselves that if they had to marry again, they would have married a somali man. "so as somali, u shouldnt have no problems looking into your society finding your mate! as your parent did! " Different time to our parents, dont you think? Back home, it was so easy but not anymore. Khalaf See above Sharmarkee "The women can change that Non-practising for better" Too much of a risk there. Only Allah guides. We can give naseeha to them but we cant make them pray or stop them eating Qat. To these i didnt reply to, it means i agree with you

Assalaamu aleykum That is very nice story RendezVous. Most men and women have an idea how to be romantic but life gets the better of them. It is nice to not to be taken for granted and in tune with each other. We should take lessons from our beloved prophet (saw)'s life.

Salaam aleykum Why is that no one has ever met a somali apostate in real life? I havent. Maybe they arent forthcoming with their new belief.

Salaam Aleykum Remembering my old folks and their parents, I dont recall them being romantic after certain years of marriage. My idea of romance is: Having weekends away, suprise gifts, going out for dinner et al. Is this what we have to look forward to when we get older or have we become too westernised? Having been married for 5 yrs myself, it is like no one has time for all the above anymore.

Salaam aleykum Before we start building these skyscarpers, let us start clearing up the roads. We have many educated people around the globe, why are we still backwards?

Nur I really thought about setting marriage service for Somalis but the idea was shot down by my family. I was told that i dont want to become 'rufiyaan nimanka and naagaha isku geysa'. I just couldnt believe it. I also tested the idea with single Somalis and they told me that any member of this service will come across as desperate. It is a shame really.

Originally posted by Nur: Cambarro and Sharmarke Context is very important in this discussion, its about a Puzzle, the writer posed as a question begging for a solution. Where should we as Somalis stand? Realisticly, apart from lip service, little or nothing can we contribute to solve the problem in Lebanon, we share no borders, nor common persuation, we have problems of our own that we are not doing enough to slove, we are divided among ourselves ( Though All Sunnis) to even preach uniting Shia Sunnah in Lebanon against their common Israeli enemy, Whilst I agree with this, i can not find within my heart not to care. As muslims we were ordered to hate injustice and oppression wherever it is. In the case of Lebonan, it hurt me big time to see how the muslims (and christians and Druze) were annihalted by undiscriminating Israelis. But the prophet Mohamed (saw) can: The Prophet (saw) said: "The Muslim community (ummah) is like a body; if one part is in distress, the whole suffers." "Not one of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself," declared the Prophet Mohammed (saw), thereby sealing the universal brotherhood of man and enjoining on the society as a whole the upkeep of the downtrodden among their ranks. What we also found it out (even though some us already knew) that non-muslim govts (not their people though) were united against the people of Lebonen (we really shouldnt count France as siding with the muslims as they have their own battles with them in their country). Many people in the west who believe in a secular society already see that acts carried out in their name by their governments are not always ethical. That unfortunately is the nature of the human world which is applicable just as much to muslims as all others. Another point we always knew was the fact that these western govts put the interest of their people first (as they should) even if it is at the expense on invading other lands. We Somalis are way behind on this score. Each leader puts his and his qabiil's interest before the greater good for all Somalis. It is about time we all put the interest of our nation first and rebuild it. We can at least have a clout to influence the international community in favour of justice. Having said this, we really shouldnt neglect the obligation and rights other muslims in other countries has over us. If we do this, then we are no better then the muslims govts who disregarded the plight of the Palestenians, Chechnya, Kashmiris, Uighurs in China not to mention the plight of their own people. Originally posted by Nur: as i write this response, the Ethiopian Army was spotted diggin at Balamballe, bent on dividing Somalia to slices that they can dominate, using clan allegiance, the defeated warlords, and targetting Islam as its core national threat. In my opinion, we have no dog in that feud, our local tragedy needs our undivided attention. Nur I totally agree. As you said, we can only pay lip service as i feel helpless. It is upto the leaders of IUC and TFG to stop Ethiopia. Isnt 16yrs of anarchy enough in our country? Why are they letting the outsiders divide the country? We can only make dua to Allah swt.

Salaam Aleykum Justice These are good men, hard-working men, who just want to be earn a living. I dont know the circles you socialise in. But where i am in London, i see men who work hard for their family, build a future for them. One of these men is my lovely husband. If a man is useless, it is only because his wife let them get away with it. As they say 'Lax walba meeshey is dhigto ayaa lagu qalaa'. But we have a shortage of men in the UK anyway so some women can NOT afford to be choosy. Maybe it is time to emigrate to US to find working men. After all we are all nomads. Another point: it aint fair that we lump all men together. But if there is a problem with men, it is mainly because of the women. Not all their fault mind you, but major part. After all they are the moms and have massive role in their son's life. If we have uneducated moms, then we have no hope in raising fine upstanding young men with hard-working moral values in our society. So one has a no-hoper for a husband, then make darn sure that your sons dont follow their dad's footstep. The first step is to make sure the father get his act together in order to be a good role model for his kids. If he cant, then make sure that he doesnt influence the kids into following his footsteps. This way we will have good men for the next generation. Allah knows Best.

Originally posted by Sharmarkee: true what you said in the above paragraph, but when a push comes to shove, The Sunni rich goverments(Saudis,Jordan,Emirates,Egypt)they suppose to stand up for the American/Isreal aggressions instead dispensing a political fatwa based by the kings/Emir's orientation propaganda. now Iraq is burning, lebanon is burning and palestine God help them, they have been slaughered like a sheep in a farm. Salaam aleykum I was reminded of this poem: When the Nazis came for the communists, I remained silent; I was not a communist. When they locked up the social democrats, I remained silent; I was not a social democrat. When they came for the trade unionists, I did not speak out; I was not a trade unionist. When they came for the Jews, I did not speak out; I was not a Jew. When they came for me, there was no one left to speak out. The rich Arabs in the Gulf, their turn will come. By then they will not have oil to use as leverage.

Salaam aleykum There are more and more sisters who want to get married but dont know where to start. I personally have 3 friends over the age of 25 who are finding it hard to meet a pious somali men. Non-practising somalis are two a penny! Somalis in Diaspora find it very hard to meet someone. We need Islamic avenues in finding a partner in the Somali Community.