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cynical lady

Me and my New Year resolutions

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Like the rest of the Stup1d people out there, I am a slave to new year resolutions. So every new year I make a resolution, and by mid Jan fail spectacularly. Come December I desperately try amend my short-comings, by then the party season is in full swing inevitably fail. I don’t want to win the lottery or get a driving license (which I should) etc, but then again maybe I should switch and aim for those-after all they’re more doable than my current lost cause….The theme and purpose of my resolutions is simple and always the same: Be kinder/nicer to people, turn up to social events in time, don’t ditch my friends for a better proposition, read to an old woman trapped at the old people home, give up my hard fought for seat@ the tube/bus to an old person/mothers with children/expecting ones etc. In short they all aspire to improve/calling for a light changes of me into a better model.

 

Easy as they may sound, I have failed in each and everyone of them and not for lack of trying, I tried, ohh I did (truly not my fault). For example when am on public transport am either reading something or closed my eyes listening to music to care about the goings/happenings around me to notice when an old person, pregnant or with child gets on for me to offer my seat too. And when I do, i start my short prayer/hope that someone else notices them and does it, which they do. In short i was planning to, but someone else go there before me……. Or the unthinkable happens and I land me a seat @ rush-hour….and let’s not kid ourselves giving that up is plainly ******. And if your old, pregnant or with children why oh why would you choose to travel at that time…….that’s the line of thought I use to justify my un-mannered behavior (I know such views are in contradiction to my feminist mantra-but I blame the devil). As for the rest, suffice to say they’re bloody hard to do too.

 

With that said, i don’t think it’s my fault, so why should I lay it all on me. Come to think of it, I blame the environment I operate on. London. I think London has a way of turning one into an individualistic/selfish person and effortlessly rude. After all I was raised differently: to be kind and considerate, care for the needy and the misfortunate. Its not my fault that the homeless guy wants money and gives me no guarantee that he won’t squander my hard earned cash on booze/drugs or sex…… But then again I also see absolutely nothing wrong with my individualistic self at times. Charitable endeavors are for the privileged/ people who possess time/patience in abundance. I for one have none. Hence my attempt to acquire some. After all the worse thing about a person is them possessing a quality you don’t.

 

So every year I attempt the impossible; and my dearest friends take pleasure in informing me that again I shall fail, but I block their discouragement and remain hopeful. But my five years of failed attempts has to come to an end at some point? So I found myself with two options ie to either throw in the towel or make one last effort-but this time choose one and it has to be operationally feasible.

 

So come NY eve I decided that in 2011 I was going to do one act of kindness per day.

 

But bloody hell it’s been the hardest thing ever to implement. And am yet undecided on whether my poor performance to-date is related to me turning that into a task or simply it’s just is. For example I got me a cat, (I didn’t really She imposed herself on me late last year-and to some am well and truly leaving up to the spinster picture) and the bloody thing went and got herself pregnant, seriously what a loose fur she. But what was I thinking anyway….silly of me, I can’t take care of plant, how on earth can I take care of an animal?

 

Grrrr and a selfish- trollope one to be precise. Anyhow, in the spirit of my NY resolution, I decided to keep her. Until she delivers that is and then dispose her and her babies to some cat-shelter. Buttttttt……I haven’t done anything wrong per se I’ve just found her a new home and failed to inform the new owner that she’s expecting. According to my friend (CL act of kindness watcher)my last act has rendered the act un-kind.

 

In-doing so, my score sheet looks like : 26days in-3 act of kindness. So am now fighting for my 4point, after all I think I’ve done the cat a world of good and gave her up to I hope a better family for her and her babies/keeping her away from me. Surely that ought to count?

 

 

Am I alone in implementing impossible resolutions?

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Juxa   

Yes waakugu kaligaa, you self centred so and so!

 

hon, you are talking about acts of kindness, the fact you considered counts for heaps! normal people's resolutions are entirely based on selfishness and self-worthness. take for example resolution to loose weight? who will benefit bal

 

my noble opinion (which has not been asked for of course ) is, keep trying, waxkasta is the niyyah...the action will follow

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Malika   

:D@CL - should have fob off the cat to me, my princess wants a pet, that hopefully wont end up being buried in the back garden..lol

 

As for your New Year resolution - I could suggest giving your time volunteering in the " feed the homeless" schemes around London, or give your time to mentor young people - All that said, aaaaaw bless!..keep the momentum going - kindness is rewarding.

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Juxa i love you and your advice. I now feel much better about my failed attempts. As for people choosing weight loss and cut smoking etc-those are facts of life in my books they don’t require such a grand commitment.

 

p.s but i still want my 4th point.

 

Mpendwa-ahh the princess wants a cat? Soweii didn’t know. I hope never again will i house a cat, but if i ever do i shall think of the lit-princess.

 

p.s do you really think i will volunteer to work with the homeless? Really do you seriously think i will do that? Don’t get me wrong the idea is nice/noble-feeding and talking to them and actually caring about their lives and them as a person. But sadly i don’t possess such abilities or the ability to withstand smell and not judge them. I have to be honest, i nearly vomit and run for cover when a homeless person gets on public transport.. Any charitable intentions i might have with this group of people will probably end with me donating money/food to a third party who will distribute to them.

 

Am still searching for an old people’s home that stocks middle-class old people-with them i hope they don’t smell or suffer from body dandruff.

A friend just suggested contributing my time to children’s hospitals. Apparently those brats need hugging/tucking in and the nurses don’t have the time to..i like babies when they’re not hungry or require nappy changing etc amiable creatures that don’t talk back.

 

So ladies what were you resolutions and how far are you in implementing them?

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Juxa   

CL i dont make resolutions, I just get on with it. Long time ago i tried the usual, being nice, not too out-spoken ( my aunt said yaan lagu cunin afkaada dheer intey dadka ka naxaan) etc

 

did not work.....now i am at that age, very comfortable, say what i think, do what i want (within reason)

 

anigu waxan ku dhihi lahaa volunteer with somali ladies, call BT, British gas and fill it forms for them. they smell lovely, will feed you and need he help.

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Juxa   

lol@ciyid,,,if only she knew what it means, che manoolaateen.

 

CL has alot of energy and could be very useful

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Juxa   

ma anaa wax isku diraa? how very dare you?

 

if i was guri iyo daashkiis baan dab qabad siin lahaa

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Juxa   

i dont do isku ***, say it as it is......you see i have free roaming af

 

adigaa dhahday gabadu wey ci'daa bal maxaad ula jeeday? (now she will get upset not because of the word but because afsomali baan meesha la fadhinaa)

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Blessed   

Perhaps, you're just not cut out to be a nice person? :P But, I happen to think mean folks are an asset to humanity, my dear.. Stay as you are.. :D

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Juxa   

^^ no she is mean and proud

 

it is good to accept yourself for what you are, mean people prosper

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