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Sistahs what comes first-Participation is needed

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Originally posted by underdog:

oh, I see. So it's not just any job you can land after finishing school.


I was always under the impression that it would take about 5 to 10 yrs of hard work and dedication you can truly be settled into a career.


my math may be off but, if I add that to the 4-8 years of school and the average age of 20, some of you may be looking to get married at age 35-40.

is this accurate?

Macalin khatar ah baa malaha xiisaabta kuu soo dhigey.


Miss Unique I think Underdog is best suited to answer your question smile.gif

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Age group: 18-20


In order of priority:


1.Education (I’m assuming you are referring to secular education since the Islamic education is always ongoing).


3.Children (this would be number 2 if it was possible without marriage ;) , but alas it is not and therefore remains as such).



But depending on the stage of ones life, these priorities might shift places. I suppose once I attain my degree in about two years, no longer will secular education be a priority, and for example if Allah so wishes to give me children career will be out of the equation while they are still young.


Personally, I couldn’t sacrifice either of the above, but if put at gun point I suppose as a woman I could do without the career (of course under the assumption my husband will be able to provide for the family), but I would love to do something worth while outside of the house even if it is on a voluntary basis.

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Hmm, I honestly believe that a career, marriage and children are blessings that I alone cannot accomplish--and I'm leaving education out because that's one thing that I have been granted so far(alhamdullilah).


So with that disclaimer, my "inshallah-list" would go as follows:






21-24 Age group


I hope this is of some benefit to you, Khayr! smile.gif

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Hi all,


How about we get real and tell it like it is these days.


1. Oops get pregnant


2. Rush in getting married before belly gets big


3. Educating yourself how to navigate throught Welfare system


4. Make a career out of attending weddings, soo dhaweyn, sii dhoofid, shaash saar, kur, alla bari, afartan bax.... and any other excuse for party imaginable.


Age 40+

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it's too late but i think beter then nothing to the poster.


1. education.

2. marriage.

3. childeren .

4. then career. cuz i love kids thena career.


age group, is anything wrong with if i say 30-35 smile.gif will see about that latter. love ya'll

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Originally posted by Opinionated:




khayr is looking for a wife!



Heee Opinionated, Ninka ha kashifin noo! How ingenious indeed.

The process of eliminations works. How else would he know about the age, the career and the goals of the one he want to marry?

More age groups please! Taking a note :D

I am 21-24…oops just following the trend! ;)



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Khayr, why's this q only addressed to the ladies? I'm inclined to agree with opinionated, that ur "research" has more to do with finding ur ideal xalimo rather than just "scientific" work.

If this was truly an unbiased "research" then gender shouldn't be a factor. So guys, for those of u who've already put in ur 2 cents even though it was addressed to the ladies, why not add ur own list of priorities of what u'd like to accomplish and age group...sorry Khayr, im doing my own lil "research" now, hope u don't mind. ;)


So guys here are ur choices:

For those that fall into the type A category:



3-marrying a 2nd/3rd wife

4-bringing into this world kids u can't raise


Type B:



3-stable career/income



So in the spirit of answering the topic, here's my list of priorities but only God knows what He has in store for me, so Inshallah, if i had my way, this is what i'd chose to happen;



2-career (or working towards it)


4-kids (if not possible, there's always adoption)

*2 and 3 may change overtime since Underdog has pointed out that many ppl find a stable career they'd like to enjoy in their mid-to late thirties, if even that early, so i wouldn't wanna postpone marital bliss as long as marriage won't get in my way of pursuing it. Who says we can't have it all?


p.s.-all kidding aside, ppl are forgetting that as much as we plan what we want our life to be, its already decided for us, whether we would have kids, marriage, career, put ur faith in God and let life fall into place. Overthinking it and analyzing it only gets u disappointment when things don't go by schedule.




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x_quisit well answerd. waxaan sameen doonno weey noo qoron tahay, laakiin waan inaan dadaalnaa.


who said girls can't dream?


nolosha meesha gaaban weligeed lagama fiiriyo, intii la is dhibi karo waa in la is dhibaa soo ma aha?

Ani sanadkaan aan jaamacad bilaaway, bilaash ma rabo inaan wax u barto waxaan rabaa insha allaah degree ga markaan qaato waxbarashadi badneed dheefteeda aan rabaa inaan dhadhamiyo, markaas ka bacdi lee u soo jeesanaa reer inaan dhisto insha allaah.

waqti xaadar kaan la joogo nin madax xanuun kiisa wax uu igala maqan yahay ma jiro.

Soomaali hadaan nahay na nimankeena markaan runta isku sheegno ma jeclo naag wax soo baratay walaahi, dad badan oo aan la kulmay (niman) wexey aaminsan yihiin gabar mutacallimad eh weey kugu kibree, reer ma dhaqaneeso.

Jaahil nimo aa dadkaas aa ka hadal siineeso!

Qufka haduu rabin inuu welfare ku noolaado, maxaa loogula yaaba?

ani shaqsiyan wallaahi marabo inaan WELIGEEY ceyr gacanta u hoorsado, because waxaan hubaa inaan ka liidanin dumarka galbeedka, IF THEY CAN DO IT, SO CAN I!!!

nimaan shaqeysan shaah waa ka xaaraan.


Insha -allaah waan gaari doonaa goosheyda!



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Ok I'm busted! :eek:

So here is my list for my 4 wives:

1. Opinionated (cause we get along oh

sooo well, its Magical at times!) ;)

2. X-quizit-Cause she reminds of me Opinionated

3. Carmel Kisses-Cause she loves

Somali Men to death. smile.gif

4. Samiyah-To show her that Somali men are

romantic. :D


Now don't feel disappointed cause the 4 are not permanent and could be divorced. So maybe after a few yrs (if I can survive THAT MUCH LOVING for that long!) then I'll think about another group to become my 'STARTERS'. :D


Samiyah, The prophet (salallahu caliyhe wasilm) had 12 wives and most of them were widows. The ones that weren't widows Aisha, Hafsa, Mariam, Zaynb etc. were real young muslimahs. If you want to use Khadijah (r.a.) just for her age, then Samiyha wait until 30 or 40, its your choice.



In anycase, keep the replies coming,

Underdog, you're very good at calculating things. :cool:

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