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Rokko

WHEN'S THE BEST TIME TO HAVE A BABY??

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Rokko   

The media has been covering the growing number of women who are waiting to have children in favor of working, only to discover in their 40s that they're no longer fertile.

But is it oversimplified to say that women in their 20s and 30s are choosing careers over childbearing? Other factors such as finding a partner, divorce and finances must clearly play a role in waiting. And it seems many abroad Nomadz are following this trend.

 

What's your take on this????spit it aight.

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underdog   

when my kid is a teenager, I need to be able to play ball with him.

 

I think I'll let my family life dictate my career ambitions and not vice versa.

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When I am staple enough and have good partner. It's good idea to start having kids at age of 23years old...cuz i want to still look when my teens are in highschool. It's good to be financially stable when starting to having kids too!

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Gediid   

Somalis say

 

Walaalkiisa dhale, Walaalkiisa dhale iyo Wadkiisa dhale......

 

I guess the same applies to women as well now pick which one sounds the best

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Gediid   

OOps made a mistake, here is what I had in mind.

 

Somalis say

 

Walaalkiisa dhale, Wiilkiisa dhale iyo Wadkiisa dhale......

 

I guess the same applies to women as well now pick which one sounds the best

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Xafsa   

The way I see it..the most important role or job I will ever have is being a mother. So everything I do is to help me prepare for that job.

But I don't think I should wait to have children because I want to chace after this world.

Like underdog said..My family should determine how far my professional life goes because family is the corner stone of society.

But there is always that issue of finding the right person.... :rolleyes:

peace and luv

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Senora   

Well, i want to be able to have kids while im young, and when i say young, I mean around 20-25. I guess its because of my parents. They had me when i was real young, and they are still young themelves.....and i guess i just want to be able to be like that as well.....i use to think that school, and my future career choices might delay that dream for me....but i know now that its just b/c i havent found Mr.Right, cause i would push back my dreams in becoming a lawyer/politician to start a family anyday.....and when i say anyday, I mean ASAP :D :eek: :D

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Senora   

They had me when i was real young,

LOOL, i meant to say that they had me when THEY were real young

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Haneefah   

Originally posted by Mobb_Deep:

is it oversimplified to say that women in their 20s and 30s are choosing careers over childbearing?

I don't think it's an oversimplification but rather a reality that we face everyday. however, I think it's mainly because of education rather than career that many women postpone marriage/children. It has to do with this era we're in where women have the the ability to follow their hearts and their dreams. And they really wanna go all the way and determine their potentials.

 

As princess mentioned, one major factor that plays a great role in delaying marriage on our part is finding that damn "Mr. Right" although I'm personally beginning to question his existence, lol, but seriously it's a lingering question that frustrates many who are ready. For instance, my best friend got into law recently and my other friend got accepted into a PhD program, and I asked them both, I said guys, you have both commited to programs that are lengthy and that will require 100% of your time and dedication, so where does marriage and family fit into your plans and Walahi...they both said that they're willing to sacrifice and take time off if again, that "right" guy comes along.

 

I think we all want to follow the Sunnah and create families of our own one day Insha'Allah and I think as Somali women with high imaan we are strong enough to balance both professional and family lives...but at the end of the day it all depends on what Allah (swt) has in store for each and everyone of us!

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x_quizit   

lol, one of the gals said best time to have kids is when we're 23, guess i should be married and pregnant by now then. Best time to have kids theoretically is when one is married, in a stable relationship, with a stable income. Parents should be able to provide for kids b4 they have them, otherwise it adds to stress in the family life. Now life itself, has this way of ruining one's plan, u might have a kid b4 u and ur partner think ur ready, but at the end of the day, one has to remember God only knows when u will have kids, if any, or shooting blanks as underdog put it, so whenever they come, see them as a blessing to ur life, rather than a burden, another mouth to feed. For sistas following careers, its good to wait if one can so that they are able to be in a good position in their career to come back to after paternity leave, but u shouldnt also be plannin' kids at 40, when ur best eggs have long since expired. looking at the bright side, there's always adoption.

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NASSRA   

HEY

I THINK THE BEST TIME TO HAVE BABY IS WHEN U KNOW THAT U ARE READY...CHILDREN IS BIG RESPONSIBILTY.....AND ALSO WHEN U KNOW U HAVE GOOD PARTNER...THAT CAN TAKE CARE UR KIDZ AND U....

ONE LOVE

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Clown, its good U KNOW ur LOST :D

 

Best time would be after a MASTERS DEGREE atleast! Anytime b4 dat is TOO YOUNG... smile.gif

 

On a Serious note...this is exactly what I think -

Originally posted by x_quizit:

Best time to have kids theoretically is when one is married, in a stable relationship, with a stable income.

Also, there is no reason to rush...exactly how many kids are you people planning on having? :confused: Normally 2 children is ideal and that should take not more than 4yrs with a 2yr gap...starting anytime between when u r 28 - 33. On the other hand marriage is not synonomous with children, so getting married as soon as you can is good. You can study, live comfortably with your partner, complete half your deen and most importantly keep away from temptations ;)

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Mujahida   

Originally posted by : DeSeRT GYPSY

 

 

You can study, live comfortably with your partner, complete half your deen and most importantly keep away from temptations

Thats so true MashaAllah. Children are a blessing from Allah. Marriage in islam is completing the half of your deen. InshaAllah to get married with the right person islamicly is really cool i believe. But I would never do that without knowing for sure that either me or my future spouse is going to be financially stable. I guess children have alot of needs that need to be taken to account but the best of all is to be educated islamicly at the end we all wanna win Allah's pleasure.( i'm speaking from a muslimah's perspective). So increase your deen and let the rest do your husband! ;)

 

peace

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