The best thing about being Married!

[Legend of Zu]

^^^^ Do you have to be sarcastic even at the times of "Amr bil macruuf"?

[Jafarel.]

Fartun sis, congratulations. May Allah make ur marriage a lasting one in this life and beyond.

 

Below is an article I hope u'll find interesting and I believe will not mislead you. Best luck of sis.

 

10 Tips for a Happy and Successful Marriage

 

 

 

The young and excited bride-and-groom-to-be; ecstatic about the upcoming wedding and marriage and the joy that it will bring. Three to six months later, reality has set in and both spouses realize that marriage is not easy task, but one that takes a great deal of effort and patience. The following are tips for both wives and husbands, to help make the task a little less daunting, and to increase the many rewards that are possible in such a marvelous and complex relationship.

 

Enter the Marriage with the Right Intention and Renew this Often

 

Both spouses should enter the marriage with the pure intention of pleasing Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, in order to receive His grace and blessings. The marriage itself then becomes an act of worship and one for which both spouses will be rewarded. Allah will be pleased with them and this will be the most critical element in ensuring peace, stability and happiness throughout the marital life.

 

It is also important to realize that when an act of worship is continued over a long period of time, it becomes necessary to renew one's intention often to remain on the correct path and to obtain the most benefit.

 

Remember that Your Spouse is also Your Brother or Sister in Islam

Too often Muslims treat other people outside the home with kindness and sincerity, but then behave in a very different manner when it comes to their own spouses. Muslims should always remember that one's spouse is also another brother or sister in Islam and that the rights and duties that apply to the general brotherhood (sisterhood) of Islam, should also form the basis of the marital relationship.

 

Obviously, a spouse has rights beyond these, but there should be a clear understanding of the rights of brotherhood (sisterhood) and adherence to these principles.

 

Do Not Hold Unrealistic Expectations

 

Before marriage, people often have unrealistic ideas about their spouse-to-be, expecting perfection in all aspects. This rarely, if ever, plays out in reality and can lead to unnecessary problems and concerns. We should recall that Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, created humans as imperfect beings, which means that many mistakes will be made throughout a lifetime.

 

By turning the table and expecting imperfection, we will be pleasantly surprised and pleased when our spouse is much more than we ever hoped for. This, in turn, will lead to contentment within the marriage.

 

Emphasize the Best in Your Spouse

 

Since no one is endowed with all of the best qualities, emphasis should be placed on the positive qualities that a spouse possesses. Encouragement, praise, and gratitude should be expressed on a regular basis, which will strengthen these qualities and be beneficial in developing others. An attempt should be made to overlook or ignore negative characteristics, as the Prophet, sallallahu alayhe wa sallam, said, "A believing man should not have any malice against a believing woman. He may dislike one characteristic in her, but may find another in her which is pleasing." (Muslim)

 

Be Your Mate's Best Friend

 

Try to think of what a best friend means and be one to your spouse. This may mean sharing interests, experiences, dreams, failures and upsets. It may involve understanding a spouse's likes and dislikes and attempting to please him or her in any way possible. A best friend is also usually someone that can be confided to trusted, and relied upon. A spouse should be the kind of friend that one would want to keep throughout life.

 

Spend Quality Time Together

It is not enough to share meals, chores and small talk together. Spouses should also find time to focus on strengthening the relationship. Often couples get busy with their own separate tasks and forget about working on one of the most important elements in life. Quality time may be anything from having a quiet, profound conversation to going for a nice long nature walk, to sharing a special hobby or project. Both spouses should enjoy the particular option chosen and distractions should be kept to a minimum.

 

Express Feelings Often

This is probably a very "Western" concept and one that some people may have difficulty fulfilling, but it is important to be open and honest about one's feelings, both positive and negative. The lines of communication should always be open and any concerns should be brought to the attention of the other spouse as soon as they arise. The rationale of this is that what begins as a simple concern may grow into a major problem if it is not addressed quickly and properly. The "silent treatment" has never been the remedy for anything.

 

Admit to Mistakes and ask for Forgiveness

 

Just as we ask Allah to forgive us when we make mistakes, we should also do the same with our spouses. The stronger person is the one who can admit when he or she is wrong, request pardon from the other, and work hard to improve his/her aspects that are in need of change. When a person is unwilling to do this, there will be little growth and development in the marriage.

 

Never Bring up Mistakes of the Past

 

It can be very hurting for another person to be reminded of past mistakes. In Islam, it is generally not recommended to dwell on the past. One may remember errors that were made so that they are not repeated, but this should not be done excessively. Certainly, as humans, we are not in the position to judge another person. Advice may be given, but not in a harmful manner.

 

Surprise Each Other at Times

 

This may entail bringing home a small gift or flowers, preparing a special meal, dressing up and beautifying oneself (this is not only for women), or sending a secret note in a lunchbox. A little imagination will go a long way here. The idea is to spice up the marriage and avoid getting into a dull routine that may negatively affect the marriage.

 

Have a Sense of Humour

 

This particular aspect can go a long way in preventing arguments and brightening the atmosphere of the home. Life is a constant stream of challenges and tests, and to approach it in a light-hearted manner will help to make the journey smoother and more enjoyable. You may also find that your spouse enjoys this characteristic and looks forward to spending time with you because of it

[Modesty]

Congratulations Fartun! Marriage is a beautiful thing because it's halaal

 

So people let's stop the dating madness, and get married!

[Janna]

Congratulations Fartun

 

Hope you have a wonderful life with your husband. Live your life in a Islamic manner and everything should go well for you, "na'mean".

[Muhammad]

congrats fartun

 

waxaan kuu rajayn;

 

guurkaa inuu noqdo

guri dugsoon oo

gacal ku midoobaan

guda qurxoon oo

gadaashiis udgoon tahay

garabkiis nabad tahay

gogoshiisu nasasho tahay

gashaan lagu xoroobo iyo

geenyo lagu xaragoodo.

[Abaadir]

Congrats Fartun

 

 

Cawo waxaa leh

ama ciil bixi lahaa

calaf nimuu ku siiyoo

cunto kula wadaaga

 

take care of your husband and yourself

[Business_Man]

Neutral View.

 

 

Marriage!, Me?, loooooooooooool.....wow. Marriage aint easy. You have to be comitted to the other person 150%. There are times when you want to be single again to pursue personal goals.

 

I am not speaking from previous experience but I have seen that marriage is not for the weak hearted!!!

 

The best thing is to wait for your alaf. Dont rush and remember, their are always plenty of opportunities that will come by. :cool:

[BonaFied_CriTic]

Originally posted by fartun:

woow pple i have to let you guys know that getting married may seem to be something hard but when you are in love and you want to do any thing god that is the best thing ever walahi. any way i am newly wed and the most thing that i enjoy is getting up early in the morning my husband making doing the breakfast eating together and playing each with the food how nice is thatn na'mean. yeah coming back home asking each others how was their day, comeon lets me honest who else would ask you that and give you big kiss on the forhead na'mean that is the best na'mean. eating dinner together puting each others mouth how wonderful is that to be honest is something that we all dream about na'mean. besides sitting on the table helping me with my homework, washing the dishes together, taking shower gosh cant' put words to that coz am so in love i gues, yeah waking up in his arms do nothing but hold each other tie and make love to each while never lasts na'mean. so the moral of this is i would recomend each and every one of you to get marry and feel the enjoyment of life na'mean being single isn't fun coz there is nothing to talk about other than this and that so forth but yeah when you are married got life, love and everying soroundings all together feel me pple. enjoy life while it lasts.

Damn congrats - but the whole concept of marraige scares the crap out of me - i mean you have to trust and live with that person your whole life - it is like once you gone black there ain't no coming back - girl am happy for you and everything - glad to know am the only one gutless in here -

[Nephissa]

taking shower

gosh cant' put words to that coz am so in love i gues, yeah waking up in his arms do nothing but hold each other

tie and make love to each

while never lasts na'mean.

Three words short and simple with a little drool afterwards: Oh My Gawd (drool)

 

But for curiousity sake, how do you manage to share the water? One of you is going to have your a$$ out in the breazee. Shower can't hit all sides of you at all times so one side is going to get cold, yes? Not so cool is it? Maxa dhibatadas kuugu wato abbaayo What's worse is the idea of taking a shower with nin weeyn oo intaas la eg! Acudu bilaahi.

 

You also tie each other? Woow, you'r a kinky one, aren't ya?

[Medley of extemporanea]

Bishaaro, maybe your shower just isn't big enough.

 

Sounds like they have 'healthy' and creative love live.

[Dhagax-Tuur]

That was quite an exciting outburst from walaasheen. Being young, found love, boy she shared her heart's feeling with no holding back a thing.

 

I am skeptic of human intentions and affairs, and I always look beyond the present, may be that is why I am ........(fill the blank), but hey, if life is about maximising happiness, you have got it, from the sound of it, so make walaalo the best of it, anna ducaan kuugu darayaa just like the rest of the nomands.

 

My opinion, as if matters, but i will drop it anyway. Marriage is a beautiful thing when love is shared mutually, but hey, each individual to whatever rocks his/her boat! Bottom line is, may Allah SW direct us to the right direction. Ameen.

[Conspiracy]

There is nothing good about getting married!! it's just one more thing you have to do just case everyone else does it :rolleyes:

[Abaadir]

Bishaaro Said

One of you is going to have your a$$ out in the breazee. Shower can't hit all sides of you at all times so one side is going to get cold,

Bishaaro.. How do you know?

[Legend of Zu]

^^^ Why would you wanna know how she knows?

 

Cheers

[Nephissa]

^ Why don't you come out and say 'I want to know too?' :mad:

 

Abaadir: That's like asking my bra size and color. The billion dollar question! Drop it son.