Kamaavi Posted December 2, 2008 I have recently got into spoken word and I've just finished my first bit I want to know what you educated people think I am getting tired of this picture perfect landscape we call a woman's face leaving me to choose over having a true or false taste. make-up please face the facts make-up is making up for what you lack Fake and bake will make you look better when you awake so you can take the earthquake away that shakes me and rakes me up as soon as she leaves. And now I see men doing the same damn thing and I'll tell you thisfalsely fine miss. I'd rather have a girl who wants me for me not what I can be enhanced visually Nowadays powder and paint makes a girl what she ain't 5 minutes in a bathroom could change her from second rate to a saint and you wonder why she was in there before and she'll be back soon. Is that your path to inner beauty? Does your face get mistaken for your booty? Does changing face come to saving grace oh what a waste when I wake up thinking who's this b!tch at my place, and who left this face on my pillow case Damn allow my steps to be retraced. This ain't right where's the one from last night. Leaving you nothing but jokes from friends when will this shit end, all I can do now is defend you woulda did it too you shoulda seen her bend. Truth is I was sober from the start we couldn't part and damn she did look good in the dark. Question is does this make me have no heart? No cause I was lied to. Now I'm being cried to. Now I don't screw till I see the two of you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Resistance Posted December 2, 2008 Is not captivating enuff. the thing with spoken word is, is only nice when is performed ( i.e when is spoken ) written on a paper is just like a song. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted December 2, 2008 LOOL I like the story it tells (a bit immoral) Good start Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chocolate and Honey Posted December 2, 2008 Be more descriptive. When it comes to spoken word, the devil is in the details. The topic you chose could be more horrific, funny or even sad depending on how much emotions you invest and what words you choose. Good luck! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
