Sign in to follow this  
N.O.R.F

UK Elections 2010 Countdown

Recommended Posts

nuune   

^^ JUXA, adi you don't need to support a particular party, you just need to set up your own party and run for Prima Ministeer, I promise I will vote for you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
chubacka   

^ they won't jst force the men, they will send every poor islaan with her walking stick out to the job centre every tuesday.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

^ Labour already did that, didn't they?

I still think Labour have abandoned their voters and pandered to the rich and powerful. So what separates them from the Tories? At least they are clear about who they are working for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Maaddeey   

^waxaan maqli jiray: before 97 Nin kasta 2 ama 3 buug ceyr aa barkinta laabkeeda ugu jiray, labourka aa magacooda Alle noo qaaday! shaqo lee yaa ku jiri kara! Ninkii Speakers corner joogaan ku raacsanahay, inkastoo Soomaali shaqo lagu aqoon, Richard Burton-aa ka qeyliyey, mase SL-ers ey ahaayeen :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
B   

My friend who is Somali has been selected to run for the LibDems in a ward. Ward is an area within a constituency. This is very positive. The area has a large somali community so hopefully, we will get him elected. I was so happy when I found this out about a month ago. :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1. A candidate will kiss a baby

 

 

The default response of any politician in a public place when they know the cameras are watching. Any candidate worth their salt will attempt this familiar ruse in an effort to make them seem warm and approachable. Only a few will avoid the double whammy of a) making the baby cry and b) looking creepy.

 

2. A candidate will handle a live animal

 

 

PA Archive

Similar in intention to 1), but with a higher risk potential thanks to the unhelpful if understandable tendency of animals not to behave in a human fashion. Mrs Thatcher was the first to attempt this stunt when she caressed a calf called Margaret during the 1979 campaign. Because it was considered a success, everyone has tried it since, though what it is supposed to tell the voter about a candidate's integrity is unclear. Perhaps an ability to weather the company of uncommunicative, ill-kempt creatures is seen as good grounding for being in the House of Commons.

 

3. A candidate will say they don't take any notice of opinion polls

 

This will happen when the candidate's party is trailing badly in the latest survey of public opinion.

 

4. A candidate will say they are buoyed by the opinion polls

 

This will happen when the same candidate's party has received a sudden boost in the latest survey of public opinion.

 

5. A party leader will attempt to name-check a contemporary pop star

 

 

Tony Blair got this down to a fine art, casually referencing everyone from The Smiths to Simply Red and even managing to work some of the lyrics of Three Lions '96 into a party conference speech ("Labour's coming home!"). Usually, however, a party leader's attempt to sound like they have their finger on the nation's pop pulse goes hopelessly wrong, thanks to a slip of the tongue (as when Margaret Thatcher confused Michael Bolton with Paul Daniels) or the artists in question rushing to distance themselves from political patronage (as happened when Conservative MP John Redwood praised the "Tory sentiments" in the line "Everything's blue now, oh lucky you" from Lucky You by The Lightning Seeds).

 

6. The spouse of a party leader will be filmed "dropping in" on a primary school

 

A leader's other half never used to play a big role in campaigns. You rarely saw Denis Thatcher pressing flesh in youth clubs and care homes. Only in the 1990s did it become fashionable for spouses to pay social calls to places full of everyday people usually not old enough to vote and hence not old enough to talk back.

 

7. A party leader will be filmed using public transport

 

 

PA Archive

The results, as with 5), are rarely successful. Something about the way they stand on a bus or train betrays the fact these people haven't been near public transport for years, and moreover are quite glad of that fact.

 

8. A celebrity guest will be unveiled at a party press conference

 

All political parties love this and you can bet it will be tried several times this year. The celebrities, once they have been paraded in front of the cameras, will inevitably struggle to answer questions put to them by journalists. But that's not really their fault: their job is to be a celebrity, not to discuss budget deficits and job creation initiatives.

 

9. Someone will be hit by an egg

 

 

PA Archive

Alternatives may include daffodils (used on Margaret Thatcher), paint (former Tory chairman Brian Mawhinney), a bucket of ice (John Prescott), flour (Michael Heseltine) and a cup of cold custard (Peter Mandelson).

 

10. A member of the public will become famous for 24 hours after asking a well-known candidate a "difficult question"

 

Politicians are confronted by voters all the time during a campaign, but there's usually one exchange that gets caught on a television camera and hence becomes what the media love to brand "a pivotal moment". Blair had a couple (the wife of a cancer patient in 2001, a student in 2005), John Major was heckled by a mob in Luton in 1992 (the first time he got out his famous soapbox) and Mrs Thatcher was tackled about her conduct of the Falklands War by a housewife live on TV in 1983. While these incidents may not directly affect the outcome of an election, they are useful ammunition for rival parties. Plus, of course, they make for great television.

 

11. A party leader will shrug off a setback by saying "I love election campaigns, they're what politics is all about"

 

Well, they can hardly say what they really feel. Although if they did ("Frankly, I'm gutted, this isn't what I was expecting and I feel like going home for a long cry") the novelty may win rather than lose them more sympathy.

 

Finally, two to listen out for in the 24 hours before polling day:

 

12. Someone will call for the whole electoral process to be reformed, if not replaced

 

Code for: "We've lost the election, but I'm blaming the system, not my party and definitely not myself."

 

13. Someone will say they are cautiously optimistic about their prospects for success but will wait for the voters' verdict

 

Code for: "We've won the election, but I don't want to appear too smug. Not until I've got inside number 10, anyway."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
chubacka   

^ wamaaxey mofo?! :D

 

 

Originally posted by Valenteenah.:

^ Labour already did that, didn't they?

Not as far as I have seen, I think if we would've been living under a conservative govt for 13 years things would be a lot worst for most working class people.

 

I think many ppl's deep mistrust of the tories is justified and Cameron isn't doing much to alleviate these fears.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Juxa   

maadeey there are people with 2 buug still? there are some with 4 council houses. men working whilst wife claims benefits

 

there are people with 2 or 3 names registered with 4 GPs.

 

if islaanta goes to job centre, it will force husband inuu reerka biilo, it will force sons and daughters to provide for mommy. waa knock on effect.

 

Britain needs if you dont work, you dont eat culture.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
chubacka   

waa runta many somali ppl and I am sure others abuse the system (lets not forget the mps themselves) laxin we cnt go back to maalmaahe Margaret Thatcher daadka waashey and probably the hardest hit will be the honest ppl who are jst trying to get by.

 

MPs are all far too detached from real life and have little understanding of the lives of the ppl they claim to speak for but I will be v. nervous if this little eton bred man is given the go ahead, as they say better the devil you know. Brown is awkward and I would probably not want to work for him but I trust him more than Cameron.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Juxa   

lool@work for brown, i like his temper, markuu xanaaqo haraanti iyo dharbaaxo

 

MPs are not the only ones milking expenses claims, ask ngonge he charged for posting sol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this