^^ In tackling Lucas had better stats. Passing sideways (stats or no stats) serves a purpose. Lucas's job after all is to win the ball and pass it on. The stats tell you that he does not waste the ball. It tells you that his tackles come off every time (he's no Scholes, saaxib) and it gives you a % of his successful passes. If you google his name you will see that many people are coming round to the idea that he is not a bad player (which is what I have been saying all season). Xabi is missed but not because Lucas is playing in his place, it's more to do with the other players not pulling their weight. Lucas is worth ten Benayouns and five thousand Babels. I rest my case. Wax la kaalaya.

^^ Circumcision! I think every man remembers that dark day. In my case, I remember it twice. The first time, I was three and a half. I ran away to a neighbour's house and my younger newborn baby brother got the chop on his own. The second time, I was five and could not get away; my other brother got the chop with me. But the first brother (who preceded us by experience and not age) kicked the door down and bit the doctor's arm (that one always got my back). You're just trying to get me to tell stories today, Sayid. I have a memory from when I was under the age of four. I pushed a tyre from the top floor (no idea if it was first, second or third) down into the road and it hit a passerby (I had to run to the neighbour’s again before I got into trouble). I remember my first day at Quran class. The Pakistani teacher was wearing a macawis and was not wearing anything under it. I could see his bits every time he adjusted his seating. I am now the most careful man when wearing a macawis. The clearest memory I have though is one about my first week at school (when I was five). One day, I was at home watching TV and I saw an actor (I think it was Kojak) winking. I thought winking was the best thing ever and spent the whole day practising my winking technique. I also spent most of the following day doing the same. In class that day, we had a skinny and very spoilt Arab female teacher (she must have been in her twenties). I winked at her. She slapped me. I did not think I have done anything wrong by winking (I still bloody don’t). So, I picked up the nearest thing to me and threw it at her. She was shocked and tried to slap me again. I picked up my chair and threw it at her. I threw everything at her. She cried and ran out of class. She returned later with the head master and the school social worker. I was outnumbered. I ran out of class and ran all the way home. My old man was called and he gave me a good beating for running away from school (not for throwing things at the teacher). The following year, in the Islamic Education class, another female teacher had given us the homework of memorising Surat Al Shams off by heart. I had actually memorised the sura ages before (I was a child geek). But on the day, I stumbled a little (with a whole class watching me recite it) and mumbled it quietly. She didn’t like it and decided that I did not memorise it. I argued with her and told her that I did and if she would give me a minute to compose myself I would show her that I did. She slapped me! Back then; the school bag of choice was a Samsonite (yes, even for six-bloody-year-olds – I got mine a year after that). The kid sitting to my left had one of those bags and it was full of his books. After whimpering to myself for a few seconds and wiping my burning cheek, I picked up the bag and threw it at the receding back of the teacher as she walked back to her desk. It hit her right in the middle of the back. She cried out in agony and then just cried. I stood there with an angry face and trembling heart. I knew I was in trouble. The head mistress and the social worker came to the class and took me away. They tried to soothe me and act like my friends but they were women teachers and my experience has already told me that women teachers SLAP. I never let my guard down for one second (even though, I did insist on demonstrating my ability to recite the sura off by heart, which I did). When my dad came, they talked to him about taking me to a child psychologist and told him that I was an angry little child. To this day, I still insist that I was not in the wrong. I WASN’T! Of course, I eventually stopped fighting teachers when the Palestinian fat maths teacher dared to slap me and I jumped on him and bit his arm. The animal punched me in the back with all the power he could muster. I let go of his arm and let go of my habit of fighting teachers. I only restricted myself to giving them evil looks and hoping in my heart of hearts that this would unnerve them. I now tell my children never to wink at teachers (especially women teachers, but they don’t understand).

Swings and roun****uts really. Insha allah khayer.

Malika, the child care theories? That stuff seems to be following me everywhere. Only the other week I had to write a report on it for something the Mrs was doing. I was sat there writing about Muslow's needs (didn't even know they applied that to children) and bloody Piaget and even that American linguist that all young university students and left wingers are fond of (what was his name again? I despise him). Come to think of it, you people that work with children lead very dull lives, don't you? P.S. I may just choose my childhood memories with you in a bit. I was actually having this discussion with my Mrs when we were writing those reports. She reckons I'd make an interesting case for those theorists.

Originally posted by Dajiye: ^Is that all you brought back this thread? You have disappointed me big time ...lol Does he know what happend to Fab? And Fab didn't even use clan names or insults. Originally posted by Admin: Fabregas_Bruv is banned for repeatedly using foul language on the forum.

^^ Did you comment on the Lucas thread? I reckon he's going to score tonight. He has been running into forward positions in the last few games. Sooner or later he's going to fluke one.

On Sunday, as I was watching Slumdog Millionaire with my old man, he chuckled to himself and said “I used to be like those little urchins when I was a kid”. “You were a street kid?” I incredulously asked. “Yes” He replied. “Where were your parents?” “At home. Mother always chased me around the streets and tried to bring me back” “How old were you?” “I was a street kid between the ages of eight to twelve. Best four years of my life”. “ How did you live?” “ Oh, I did all sorts of things. I helped old ladies carry their shopping for a price. I sold phoney souvenirs to British tourists and I even rode a taxi bike”. “A taxi bike? What is that?” “A bike that doubled up as a taxi. It had a side seat where the passengers would sit”. “So you were not really a street kid. You were an early pioneer of what the westerners refer to as child labour”. “No. No. I was a street kid. I never lasted in any of these jobs. I just did them to feed myself for a day or two and then quit”. “Did you ever get in trouble?” “I got into lots of fights and was also arrested many times”. “But they let you off on the same day, right? You didn’t go to jail, did you?” “Oh I did, for weeks at a time. It drove my mother insane”. “Why did you do it?” “It was fun. In fact, I remember a day when I was loitering around the local court – this was a habit of mine, to see which of my friends was being sentenced that day – I saw Cumar Qardhaas standing in line and scratching his head” “Cumar Qardhaas? You mean the old man that lives in West London? Cabdi’s father?” “Yes. He lived in West Cadan back then”. “What was he arrested for?” “There was this posh factory in the outskirts of town. All the street kids used to go there to sneak into the canteen and have free dinners or lunches. However, if you were ever caught, you were taken to court and sentenced to a few weeks in prison. Everyone was caught at one point or another”. “So he was going to be sentenced for a couple of weeks in a young offenders centre?” “ Nonsense. He was going to prison. Real, big boy prison”’. “Was he crying? How old was he?” “Same age as me, nine or ten”. “What happened then?” “He begged me to take his place in the line so that he could sneak out and go tell his mother the bad news and give her whatever little money he had collected that day”. “Eh? You make it sound like it was a supermarket line!”. “It sort of was. All the offenders had to stand in line and wait for their turn to see the judge and get sentenced. There were only a couple of policemen keeping guard and it was easy for kids like us to switch places without being noticed. We all looked alike anyway, with faces that were full of scratches and heads that were dry and dusty”. “So did you take his place? Did you not worry that he will not come back?” “Yes I took his place. I was not worried because I knew that if he didn’t come back I would go after him and beat the hell out of him”. “So what did he do?” “Well, I waited in line for ages and there was still no sign of him returning. The line kept moving until it was my turn to see the judge and there was still no sign of Cumar. I finally had to shout that it was not me who was under arrest and told the judge the whole story. He asked me if I knew Cumar’s house and sent me with a couple of policemen to retrieve him.” “And did you? Or did you trick them and take them to the wrong address?” “Wrong address? I took them right to his house, son. Worse still, when we got there, the front door was wide open (as was the habit in those days) and we could see him sitting on the floor and happily chatting to his mother as they eat some rice” “Ha ha!” “The police stopped me from strangling him there and then”. “What was his mother’s reaction?” “Oh she hated my gut. She kept on cursing me and asking why didn’t I give the police the wrong address and why am I helping them send her son to prison”. “ Heh. The poor woman had a point, I suppose”. “What point? I was going to go down for a crime I didn’t commit, you hollow piece of wood”. “But seriously, is this all true?” “Are you calling your father a liar? Why don’t you ask Cumar, I bet he fondly remembers those two weeks in prison and probably still blame me for them”. disclaimer: Names and some detailes have been changed to protect the (not so) innocent.

Yes. Yes. But neither of you challanged the issue here. He is no Fabregas or Messi but he is a good player. A very good player at the job he does and the position he plays in (better than Song, Fletcher, De Jong and Obi whatshisname - the stats and performances say so). Ayoub said he can't defend but the stats proved he defends better than most. Ayoub said he can't pass but the stats prove that he does not waste any passes. What other arguments do you have? P.S. Heskey is not the best English striker. He's the second best.

^^ I think you know the point I was making (I wasn't being dirty, Juxa. Stop the shocked looks).

The ones here!

^^ Yes, but you forget that the dirac itself was mostly worn with no supporting...ahem..bras. (I'm well too).

Check out the stats on Sky's page. More accurate passing than Fabregas? You will also see that he is one of the top tacklers in the league (accuracy of the tackle is looked at here). Opta stats show Lucas has completed the third-highest number of passes in the Premier League this season (incidentally, his completion rate of 87 per cent is the highest in the division) and the fourth-highest number of tackles. Not bad for a player signed with a reputation as being a box-to-box midfield player He might not have the spectacular streak of Cesc Fabregas or Michael Essien, but he is effective. Effective enough to ensure that Mascherano's undoubted energy and dynamism have barely been missed. Source I've been saying it all season (and the last) but nobody would listen. Now challange the facts.

^^ You have been watching with your heart and not your eyes. Lucas is the only player I'm going to defend here because he is the only one who did/does his job well. Not even that, the actual player stats show him to be doing real well. War leave the guy alone.

Originally posted by *Buuxo*: This is not our culture,xishood la'aan that is. Even with the niiko it was never performed by unclad women. There is no denying that many somalis adhere to their religious beliefs and practises in the West.And I don't think it's just fear of western ways but the tragedies from the last 20 or so years has given many a wake up call to return to their deen. It's trends, dear. It ebbs and flows. Back then it was all xarragow and now it's all deen. This business of saying Somalia did not have such things in the 80s and 70s and 60s is nonsense. Short skirts were all the rage. Lack of hijabs (in social functions and sexy knee length dresses were accepted), men chatting women up openly was no big deal. It wasn't singers alone who did all of that (the mixed schools and the school uniforms alone give you an idea of what some would call the golden era of Somalia). Be glad you, Ibti and the others don't have to show your black knees to the rest of the world. (and how are you by the way? Long time no see).

^^ Do not pick on Lucas. He has been Liverpool's best player this season. He has been the league's best defensive midfielder this season. Anyone who says otherwise has not been watching him play this season. (I am not joking either).

Originally posted by Norfsky: You will get 13 points out of those game. You will beat: Villa Man Utd Liv Sunderland You will lose to: Chelsea You will draw with: Stoke They play Villa on the 27th. They play United on the 31st. They play Chelsea on the 7th and Liverpool on the 10th. If you reckon they'll lose to Chelsea, I can't see how you believe they'll beat Liverpool. In fact, I can't understand what logic you use when you have them winning one game, losing the next and winning the one after then losing the next. They'll either do well in all the games or they'll crash and burn (my money is on the second). United are top with 50 points (having played one game more than us) and we are sixth with 37 points. If you were going to cheer for a lost cause then your chances are much better with Liverpool than Arsenal warya.

Juje, dee ma been ban sheega? I'm a football fan and I was expecting a lot of somali xarragow from this kid (he did make one great cross at one point but everyone missed it. He also set up the third goal). But it wasn't the greatest debut ever.

^^ He was crap to be honest. But now that they have Patric V, he might learn a thing or two from the master.

This is the first time I've seen a Nigerian scam right from the start! The president is still alive but poorly. Next, they'll tell us he died and reveal secrets about the millions in his bank account. Any of you ready to help them transfer the money?

Yes he is, Norf. Another mad man like you. What are these women talking about?

^^ I don't subscribe to the view that Torres and Gerard ARE Liverpool FC, saaxib. The team has done it without them on countless occassions in the past (like when we beat United) and lost with them in many other occassions. It's all about three or four of the other players being on their game (like Carra the other day). The team looks good and should be able to win the majority of their upcoming games (with the next game being the most important). The new guys look good (Aquilani had his best game the other day and can only improve. Maxi looks to fit in from the start, and he only playd a total of ten minutes). It's all about Arsenal's fixtures for us. If all goes to plan we could be very close to the leaders by the tenth of Feb. I actually don't like Rafa by the way.

^^ Follow the logic, mate.

Juxa, cafis eedo. I'm only teasing CL here. Norf, what if the leg got worse? You're such a crazy riks taker, man. If it were me, I would not have played football for a year (just to make sure everything is ok).

^^ Just be prepared, dear. On the day I do it I expect you to be ready for flight within minutes. Faheema, this is the best one (the logic behind it and the micky take is just brilliant):

What change Faheema? I'm same old me. Oh, you mean hitting on Juxa just ther? She deserves it. She encourged me to steal.