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Jacaylbaro

Diaspora Vs Locals: Hilarious Stories

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This happens to a young man from Diaspora. The relocates to Hargeisa for work and with a very much limited Somaliland language but he is still trying to fit in and get used to the people, culture as well as the language. Mohamed, is such great man working and living in a house where he lives with some of his friends.

 

One day there was a knock on the door and he responded. It was early in the morning and he just woke up but when he opened the door, there is this guy standing there with dirty clothes, dusty shoes, red eyes, big hair and looks rough. Mohamed was shocked at first but then decided to talk to him.

 

Mohamed: Yes

 

Man: Waar keen Xashiishkii

 

Mohamed: Shocked, looking around like if anybody is hearing this “Xashiish” ?

 

Man: Haa dee, Xashiish kii keen

 

Mohamed “with is broken Somali”: Waar anagu Xashiish ma iibinee naga tag

 

Man “looking at the guy and wondering”: Waar xashiishkii keen dee muxuu leeyahay

 

Mohamed: Waar anaga maahee kuwaan nagu xiga waydii

 

Now the conversation is getting tough as this guy is insisting Mohamed to give him the “Hashish” and the guy trying to convince his that they do not sell “Hashish” here it is probably one of the neighbors who does that. After a long struggle the man now realizes that there is something wrong here and wanted to be more clear.

 

Man “now pointing at a garbage in front of another house”: Waar xashiishkaasoo kele miyaanuu kuu oolin ?

 

Mohamed: Shit ! ! Ma Qashin baad u jeedaa ???

 

Man : Yes, hadaa maxaanu sheegaynaa.

 

Now Mohamed finally understands that the world “Hashish” in Somaliland means “Qashin” or “Garbage” in English. He never heard of that word before and when this rough-looking guy asking him “Hashish” early in the morning he thought he is talking about “Weed” and did not want to be arrested for something he doesn’t sell.

 

The man was simply a garbage collector and he does that every other day.

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You guys dissing these stories are sad...But the story comes out flat because it is better told in person. Especially with the reer woqoyi accent. I love listening to my friends who have numerous stories when they come back. L0L.

 

Like the "biciid" story. Apparently, the diasporans are called biciids and if he/she has been there a while, he/she becomes a biciid geesaha ka dheceen, meaning he spent most of his/her money therefore no much shaxaad. waar biciidku ma geesa dhacay,they would ask...Reer woqooyigu waa funny.

 

But anyway, us sujuis have had our own "stories" for years. . Like the kid who was asked, what sub clan he blongs to" . He posed for a minute struggling to name his sub clan (all the while umming , erring and eehing, while pointing to the sand)....Giving up he turns to his friend and asks in Swahili, "Oyeeh, niambie, wale wana ingianga mchanga waitwa nani"? L0L. ( Yo!,Tell me, who are those that go into the sand?>?")

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hooyaa inankeedii ku tidhi,"orod aabe soo kici wuu shaqa tegayaaye". Inankii baa galay qolkii aabihii hurday, markaasu arkay odaygii oo kacay oo dharkii gashaday.Hooyadii buu ku soo noqday, markaasu yidhi,"hooyooy aabe wuu kacsanayaa".Trying to say dad already get up.

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Sheekaba sheekay keentaaye, islaan baa odaygeeda ku tidhi ee xaaji markaad ii baahan tahay, caruur soo far ''Aabe calculator kii ii soo dhiib buu ku yidhi''....Ka dibna caruurtu intay u tagaan ayay ku odhan jireen, ''Hooyooy, aabe calculator ka ii keen buu ku yidhi'' halkaasi fahmi jirtay iyana,...haddaba maalin kale ayaa odaygii sidii caadada u ahayd ciyaalkii soo faray ''Calculatorkii hooyo kasoo qaada'' laakiin markan islaanta waa lala joogay oo dumar kale ayaa la joogay, dabeetana waxay tidhi, waxaad aabe ku tidhaahdaan, calculator kii waan waayay ee hadhaw, baan baadhi doonaa marka dumarku iga tagaan....markay dumarkii ka tageen, ayay caruurtii soo fartay aabe u sheega calculator waa la helay ku dheh, laakiin wuxuu ugu jawaabay, iska daa ku dheh maanta xisaabtii gacantaan kaga shaqeeyee.

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"oyeeh, niambie, wale wana ingianga mchanga waitwa nani"? L0l. ( yo!,tell me, who are those that go into the sand?>?")

;););)

 

 

,"hooyooy aabe wuu kacsanayaa".

;););););)

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Islaan Baa Yurubta La Keenay Markay Woxoogaa Joogtay Ayay Aragtay Inanteedii Ay Lajoogtay Oo Markay Warqadi Soo Dhacdaba Iska Ooyaysa Oo Leh Maantana Waxan Iyo Waxan Ayay Ileeyihiin Soo Bixiya Lacagtooda, Islaantii Baa Markay U Adkaysan Waydan Oohinta Inanteeda Ee Joogtada Ah Ku Tidhi Inanteedii: "Hooyo Dee Halkan Yar Ee Ay Waraaqaha Kasoo Ridayaan Maabad Inaga Gufeysid Yaanay Warqad Dambeba Inoo Soo Ridine" :D

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Anigu waxaan maqalay mid yaroo dhaqan celis ah oo Burco maalin is yidhi toast iibso. Mac macaanle iyo meelaha wax lagu gado mid ka mid ah intuu tegey buu yidhi saaxib toast isii.

Kii meesha haystey baa ku yidhi oo toastkuna waa maxay adeer.

Kii yaraa markaasuu yidhi waa roodhi la gubey adeer.

 

Kii meesha haystaa isagoo yaaban intuu cunugii cabaar eegay ku yidhi,"adeer roodhi gubatey lama cunee, yay caloosha kaa qabane, hoo tan caadiga ah bilaash iskaga qaado," Lool.

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why should i pay 'blood money'. i dont want to be part of this insurance policy. its not like i'm the one doing the killing and destroying other peoples properties. i'm been hustled to pay 1,000,000SLSH. this is pathetic.

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