underdog Posted July 30, 2003 They say Toronto is friendly city. Well, my last experience taking public transit was almost a little too friendly. In fact, if it happened in Afghanistan, I’m pretty sure I’d be in jail. Those Taliban guys are pretty strict about personal space and such things. It does explain why none of my female friends take the train, though. It was Saturday afternoon and I had just dropped off my car at the mechanics, and while I did know there was a Blue Jays game that afternoon, for some reason, I’d thought it was a 1:30 start. I was wrong. ****** me, I got on a Southbound train heading home 45minutes before the first pitch. It was so bad, the only thing I grab onto to stabilize myself while the train moved was to put three fingers inside the opening around the emergency door-opening knob. Otherwise, I’d have been bouncing off three people. All went well for a couple stops, despite my newfound sympathies for sardines in a can. Everyone on the train had used deodorant and most people at the subsequent stops realized there was no way in hell they could fit into the car and decided to wait for the train that had come up behind us. This continued until I was one stop away from where I was getting off. Then it happened. Some dipstick decided he needed cram into the car, which was OK, as there actually was room for one more person… barely. Unfortunately, he decided his girlfriend needed to get on the train, as well, and there wasn’t room for her. I think she realized this, as she didn’t step into the car as much as her man grabbed her hand and yanked her in. She popped into place between myself and some other guy, much like a jigsaw puzzle piece. So quickly was she yanked in that her purse was actually stuck between my waist and the car door. Not only was I completely wedged in and unable to move, but between the cramped quarters and her purse being inadvertently wrapped around me, every time she moved, I was going to move. Oh yes, and the way she was wedged in placed her backside directly in my lap. Worse yet, while I at least had three fingers inside the ledge to stabilize me, all the young lady had to hold onto was her boyfriend’s arm, and apparently he wasn’t the strong sort, ‘cause the ride was bumpy and she was bouncing all over the place… in my lap… while I was standing up. To put it in more crude terms, I was getting the grind. It was a bit of a shock. Regardless, this was definitely an uncomfortable situation and getting worse by the second. The young lady in question was mad at her boyfriend for yanking her on the train, she was mad at me for simply standing where I was standing, and she was mad at the fellow on the other side of her because he had seen my predicament and was staring at me with a big smirk on his face. Since she was getting so angry, the young lady, not realizing I literally couldn’t move at all, started twisting around right and left, trying to unwedge herself. Since there wasn’t over an eighth of an inch of compressible space anywhere around her, all this did was accelerate the grind. I consider myself a gentleman, after a fashion, and the situation was starting to go from bad form to downright impropriety. It wasn’t like I could get any separation from the young lady, and frankly, the guy behind me was a little closer than I thought manly, as well. As she continued to buck, although I wasn’t on my way to the ball game, in an attempt to avoid a more embarrassing situation, I sure did start thinking about baseball. While I was in middle of thinking about baseball, her purse finally popped free and she was able to finally get off my lap. Unfortunately, when she moved off my lap, she landed on the only place that could possibly be more indiscreet. She wound up wedged against my leg. Specifically, right over the pocket where my keys were. My rather bulky set of keys. And as it was still her backside wedged against me, I don’t think she quite realized that it was protruding metal she was leaning on, ‘cause she didn’t look too happy. Fortunately, by this point, the train was finally pulling up to my stop. Needless to say, I wasted no time in getting off the train. While a fat woman did take the seat next to me and spilled over into my personal space on the ride back home, largely because she was a seat and a half wide, I didn’t have any other significant events on public transit on the way home. In the future I’m probably going to make more of an effort to avoid the train around Bluejays games. It could give a guy a bad reputation, just for standing around. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
- diamond princess - Posted July 30, 2003 If you were a cutie, I'd prolly won't be mad at all... Just Kidding, that was such a funny incident.Lol. I can't help but laugh, not at you, of course, but at the situation you were in. Consider your self lucky, you got a lap dance for free of charge.Lol. .:peace n love:. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A7LA-SHU Posted July 30, 2003 hahahahaha. dymmmmm :eek: . i really don't know what to say coz u crackin me up here dude.. but hey it wasn't that bad come on now lol.. hey i have never used train and after readin this i don't think i ever will lol.. and yeah sis tell him it was big time FREEE LAP DANCE.. u should have thanked the young lady lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted July 31, 2003 Looool looks like the TCC is getting more exciting. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miskiin-Macruuf-Aqiyaar Posted July 31, 2003 Salaan... I guess someone cannot distinguish between Chicago and Toronto. "They say Chicago is friendly city. Well, my last experience taking public transit was almost a little too friendly. In fact, if it happened in Afghanistan, I’m pretty sure I’d be in jail. Those Taliban guys are pretty strict about personal space and such things. It does explain why none of my female friends take the train, though. It was Saturday afternoon and I had errands to run on the North Side, and while I did know there was a Cubs game that afternoon, for some reason, I’d thought it was a 1:30 start. I was wrong. ****** me, I got on a Northbound train 45minutes before the first pitch..." Want to read the whole story, click here _________________ Credit where it is due, baliis. And quit tarnishing the TTC. ________________ Macsalaama. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LANDER Posted July 31, 2003 lol..that's a funny story. Looks like you been exposed though underdog Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baashi Posted July 31, 2003 MMA, Ouch! widaay u r out to humiliate nomads huh?...didn't know u were like that! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted July 31, 2003 I didn't actually say it was me, I just thought it was funny as hell....by the way the email joke forwarded to said Toronto not Chicago. But I guess MMA is the Chief Intelligence officer in here...you can finger print me, find my links with Baraakat and send me to Guantanamo. I don't function on credit and I don't need a pat on the back to validate me. So you can keep your credit. If you like the story and and it brought a smile to your face good. If it didn't too bad. I remember something you said in a previous post in the Sports section about how Somaalis like critizing each other. Looks to me like you're continuing the trend. Kinda sad, Bro. But I think I speak for most of the other Nomads here when I say We're here for Bro. Anything you need to say or do to feel better about yourself, we're with you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miskiin-Macruuf-Aqiyaar Posted August 1, 2003 Salaan... Under, macalinka, ha u bixin. Mar mar in rooso la isku cabo waa fiican tahay nooh. Caarif majirin meesha, adaa TTC soo fara gishatay, and I have every right to defend its reputation since I had been given a whole year's worth of free pass, ee marka hadii magaalo kale ama meel kale ka hadli lahayd, shuqulkeey ma ahaan laheen. Hadaa si kale u qaadatayna, raali ahoow, widaay. Baashi, yac waraa. ________________ Macsalaama. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iffah Posted August 1, 2003 MMA: C'mon...the TTC isn't all that! I could've easily believed that happened in Toronto. Have you seen how crowded it gets during the rush hours? & Do you know how many 8am lectures I almost missed because of the over-crowded trains (of course it've helped if I left the house sooner!) :rolleyes: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
underdog Posted August 1, 2003 MMA, not too long ago I was a strong supporter of riding the rocket,but sheekada waxay xumaatey when xariif sarqaan aah threw up on my shoes when I was on my way to date (the Dundas Streetcar, if you've never been on it, I strongly suggest you avoid it). So it was bad enough I had to try romancing this fine young lady via public transport, but matag markii lagu daro, it's time to invest in a car. wouldn't you agree? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iffah Posted August 1, 2003 ^^ Loool!! Miskiin. Oh wait, it was only your shoes! If you guys are gonna avoid any buses..let it be the Sherbourne bus! You meet the weirdest bunch on that bus (the druggies and the unstable folks) I learned my lesson, when this lady threw up on the back of the bus...and I was covered with splotches of her vomit from the back of my jacket all the way down to my shoes! To make matters worse, it was around late March, when SARS began..and I was on the way to school to write an Exam... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miskiin-Macruuf-Aqiyaar Posted August 2, 2003 Salaan... Some TTC beefs, aha? Hokey, here you have one: One early evening in 2001 we--me and two of my friends--got on this bus, #58 {Lawrence West}. We were standing, having a conversation, suddenly when this old Jamaican lady, who was sitting under where we were standing, freaked out, shouting repeatedly, "All you Soomaali no-good, good-at-nothing people." For a second, I thought this must be a Candid Camera gone bad. And she then particularly looked at me, as though I was a creature from another planet and said, "You stink! You Soomaali people stink. And yes, you stink!" We immediately started laughing--dhaq dhaq dhaq...kikikiki. She got more angrier and kept bad-mouthing Soomaali people until she no longer couldn't tolerate our laughing and left from the bus. We later realized she was a real crazy person and had a beef with Soomaali people particularly. _________________ Macsalaama. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted August 2, 2003 loool @ underdog. War waa luguu raaxeeyay ee maxaa rabtaa? joking Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LADYHOVA Posted August 2, 2003 looooooooooooooooooool that story was funny stil it relly doesnt matter who wrote or where he got it but it kept me laughin for a good 20 min lol newayz keep puttin up funny things holla bac! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
