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Xaaji Xunjuf

Why do Somalis act

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Waar Xaajigu sheekaduu badalay isagaa rabay in lala hadlo. He started with "waadh ma Koonfurian baad tahay" and the dude just looked the other way and made himself bust with the iPad. Xaajiga markay ku xumaatay uu sheekadii ninkii kale dusha ka saaraa :)

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N.O.R.F   

^Somalis are not individuals. We are a family. It is expected for you be curteous and have a natter with another Somali on your travels (if they're not insulting towards you).

 

ps I somehow can't imagine XX with an iPad :D

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Wadani;897867 wrote:
Nin-Yaaban, what does Midhaa mean? Judging from the context it's synonymous with malaha. I never come across this word before.

Sorry, it's "mindhaa", as Ismahan said. I think it's used in Afgooye or Barawee. That's where i learned it.

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Abtigiis   

What I wanted to say to A-buufis- sorry I mean Apophis, Norf said it, laakin i want to tell Apo that the discussion is not what we would do ourselves, it is about how to deal with when these things happen. Also, i thought you are better than that? Ileen you are brainwashed. "Private space" kulahaa? Whose culture is that? Waryaa there are no such things among us. " xaaskii maxaa ku dhacay wali uur ma yeelane?" ayaa la iswaydiiyaa.

 

And it is not like I am saying it is shame; it is just that it has different meaning when somalis ask this thing each other and when it is applied in a different setting. Somali- bashing is recently in vogue. It apparently attests to one's sophistication and civility. I hear it always and it is sickening! It is one thing to criticize ourselves on our backward cultural beliefs, our men's irresponsible poligamy, our oppression of women etc. That is necessary. But to bash Somalis for breaking western - and now internationalized- etiquettes is shameful. Especially when the people you are judging most likely did not have the opportunity to know what you know.

 

Always prioritize respect and compassion over pride and ego. It is not a loss if you are made to look small if that helps one other person feel better. Let that person take you for a fool, that won't make you a fool. Have the inner self- belief and self-respect to take offences and abuses; you will not make yourself big by shouting back or by showing the other person that you are better. Markaa, take from your pleasure and give to the other person and if that means you feel uncomfortable and violated for a while, let it be! It is not like you are tolerating domestic violence. It is a fleeting discomfort. Chubaka is right.

 

Yes, all are human beings, so give the respect a human being deserves to a somali who is also a human being. Hadaad wada dhalasho u soo dhawyn kartana ka sii fiican!

 

Caawa, maxaan u jeedaa wacdi baa iga soo hadhaye...! Wait, Apophis, you are right. Forget about what I said here. Adigaa iga quman. Put them where they belong to diinta aabahood waxooyinka primitive'ka ah!!! :D

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STOIC   

Having read Xaaji posts here I'd never have thought he is anti-social type. Most Somalis remain unworried about striking a conversation with a stranger! I personally have absolutely no problem meeting or striking up a conversation with a Somali person on the street.Matter fact I have met few nice people like that..I always meet taxi drivers or bump Somalis in restaurants. I usually don't initiate Conversations, but if they do I'm always comfortable with them. I always try to be receptive to their stories even when I know they buulshiting..hahha

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Abtigiis   

Stoic, gobanimo@dadnimo.qalbi-xaadhni.

 

I too was shocked because Xaaji never looked like that to me. I hope he is just doing a palaver.

 

Apophis - i think i did not say much that is useful to most SOLers, but given your position on this issue, i think it is a different perspective. :D By the way, you don't have to stay the course and stick to bad ideas just because to say " aha, maybe I am wrong" looks like a death to you. I know our people equate yielding ground or admitting mistakes to a disgrace, but I am serious when I tell you your attitude - unless you are not playing the bad guy intentionally - is not right.

 

Hadaa inaan iscayno rabtana, habeen danbe inooga dhig caawa waa habeenkaan dhashay - arbaco ayaa soo galaysa - markaa hooyaa tidhi wax xun ha ku hadline. :D :D

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STOIC   

^Xaaji didn't realize that while he was strutting that Ipad the Somali guy was also loosing hope in conversing with someone with kibiir...it's not like the dude was asking for money.What was that Mooge famous song? Taatkaa haiska weyneen comes to mind

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Somalis expect you to talk to them because you are Somali they think they know you because you are Somali. Why is that i mean if i know you sure we start chit chat even if he introduced him self in a polite way i would have not ignored him. The man started with bal waran si an anigu war u hayo wuxu ka hadlayo iyo wuxu rabo.. Abtigiis white people will not just start a conversation with a complete stranger they might talk about the weather for a few seconds and than they will go back to reading their news paper.

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A_Khadar   

N.O.R.F;897914 wrote:
Its your choice. I was trying to appeal to your Somalinimo side.

Ignore Apo for now, you're right. Somalis regardless of knowing each other talk to each other.. I still recall in Adis Ababa, new comers in town who lost or knew nobody brought to us to stay the night with us by just somalino until they found their place or people they knew.. It was back in early 90s when somalis were fewer in Adis Ababa..

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Abtigiis   

Stoic, waad carrab la'dahaye heesta aan kuu saxo. dadka ha iska wayneeyn weeye.

 

But I think it is not that simple. Islawayni almost always goes hand in hand with foolishness. Who are you or what have you achieved or which rocket have you sent to the sky when you are looking down on someone?? There are always millions who are better than you in this world. You don't want them to look down on you.

 

On the xaaji story, what would he feel if someone else treats his overexcited but good uncle the way he did to the man? Dadka. Aad xumaynaysaa they are someone's father, mother, sister, cousin, son or wife or daughter! You don't want any of yours to be treated badly. Again, my useless rethoric again Apo.

 

I guess I am failing in acting like the nice guy. Believe me waa caawa uun. Tomorrow dadkan primitive ka ah, ee dadkeena sophesticated ka ah aan ina fahmayn waan kula garaaci doona, Apo; our resident Aristotle! :D

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Apophis;897901 wrote:
Why did he have to sit next to XX? Just because he's Somali? I would never do that unless the other person explicitly asked for it to be so. Somalis, of the older generation, do not know or respect personal space and it appears this guy did just that. Why is the guy who wants a quiet journey seen as the odd one and the intruder is praised?? XX was in the right 100%

actually i disagree, with all due respect, Apo. in the vast wilderness of the qurbaha and even more so in the low-lying country of holland, somalis are sparsely populated so as not to create the muslim ghettos and ethnic enclaves, so common to the uk, these days. in the uk, somalis are free to travel, settle, construct identities and therefore do not acknowledge each others with that 'hey, you're somali and so am i' type of greeting, any more. these usually involve a raising of the eyebrows or even a salam. in holland, somalis are a few and in between and you'd expect a friendly face from other somalis. in those golden days, before an influx of refugees sought to destroy our communitinimo and shared values, people often spoke to each other and would even go as far exchanging contact details to remain in touch.

 

unfortunately, XX, represents a new breed of somalis who accord no value to communitinimo and its spirit. this behaviour is all too common, nowadays, unfortunately. terms like 'sorry', 'excuse me' and other such fallacies that seek to put barriers between people are frequently used by somalis in the diaspora, without regard. for them there is an expectation to conform to a set protocol or standards of behaviour. for us there is an obligation to treat others with respect, even, if, to your detriment. this is because we have clean hearts and mean no harm, even if our dealings are considered by others to be outside of the set standards. here in somaliland, sometimes you get the impression that personal space and privacy are not respected at all and when there is an intrusion to such lofty comforts, its because we're human and we move on....... in the WEST, if someone looks at you and raises an eyebrow, it might mean something all together sinister. if a WESTern person rubs their body against yours, say for instance on the busy tube, it might just be that solitude has driven them to such extents and their yearning to make contact with another human being reminds them of being alive.....or it may just mean they're perverted, because the set standards of expected behaviour, has made such physical contact, a taboo, which goes against social convention. these social conventions have become so regimented that breaking them is as alluring as electricity to a fly.

 

in japan, senior business managers and elites are resorting to new methods to release the anguish of being gagged and conformity in how to behaviour, how to interact and how to express themselves in maintaining the social etiquette's placed upon them by society. they go to Maid Clubs to live out their fantasies of being able express themselves, to be unruly in a controlled environment and to be human. these clubs are attracting more and more members because social conventions are increasingly alienating more and more people.

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STOIC   

Abtigis,

 

Haha..I have a problem with the Somali spelling...Xaaji just need to chill and lower his guards..Funny story..Once I met a nice young Somali cabby and we started talking.After hearing my Somali accent the first question he asked me was if I belong to former President Riyalle qabiil.I didn't take offence at the question and today he is a close friend.I even personally mailed him an invitation card to my wedding and he did showed up.He fitted right in the crowd. He was from Sheikh Sharif clan..Until today we are good friends. He ask me for help in medical, dental and legal issues..Haha..even though sometimes I have no expertise in many of the areas..Something about Somalis and according respect to people that went to school...Good guy.

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Abtigiis   

Xaaji, maxaad tidhi?? White people don't intrude aa? So? ... Neve mind.

 

Ok, dadkeena dee sow wali dabadik kuma taalo Xaaji??? So sidaa ma aha Xaalku?

 

Waa aduun nin nool tu walba wuu arki. Waa ninkaan islahaa waa waayo araganagii!!!

 

If the whites don't talk to each other, we don't have to talk to each other. If they fart, we have to fart. ... And we wonder why our girls bleach themselves!?

 

P.S. good to know that perspective but no, mine is different. I have no problem with the mannerism of the west nor the way they live. I am talking about how Somalis should live. And also please calm down, i didn't know you are vulnerable. You have made your point on my long-windedness known. If you can offer advice, i will truely appreciate; but repeating the same point over and over makes you look angry. Inaga daa dee, we don't have to go that way. We can disagree or dislike each other ( which is not the case on my part) but we should tolerate each other.

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