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J.Lee

Way-Side Conversations

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J.Lee   

I. Boy #1: Hey dude, let's go. What are you doing?

Boy #2: I'm waiting to get in. Y'all just go without me

Boy #1: No dude we came together, we leave together. Like f!ck!n Siamese twins.

Boy #3: F!ckin' siamese twins? That is kinda gross dude. I don't know about that...

 

II. Friend #1: What do you call a gay Ethiopian? You guys give up? a Fruitopian [Laughing]

 

III. Friend #2: Hold up I'm getting a call from Somalia. [softly]Hello. OMG it's just Blockbuster. They tricked me. Dude, [turning to me]did you know that Blockbuster and Somalia had the same number?

 

IV: Professor: Discussions are a lot like gardening. You first have to clear a space in order to plant...use a shovel..

 

T.A: A HO3 would be more appropriate ...

 

Professor: Yeah, so pace yourselves folks. Now, let's have someone drag a HO3 through the garden.

 

V: Friend #3: You gotta be the first fat person to vomit at food usually your species eat the food and what backward country are you from where you vomit in a plate? clearly not Somalia.

 

My side note:

 

I'm always fascinated by words and how they are used especially in conversations. I actually keep a quote book for my friends much to their annoyance but I think they secretly enjoy it.It's just my little quirk When I hear something out of place, I pause either to laugh or to jot it down.

 

Is there anything you've ever heard that stood out to you?

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winnie   

uhm, do your friends partake in any illegal substances? you know the... *ahem*

*white police officer voice*:

mary-wannna?

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Mowgli   

*First week living in halls*

 

guy: you know i've never seen a proper black person before

 

me: proper black as opposed to...?

 

guy: my best friend is half and half but he just looks white

 

me: ok *scratches head*

 

guy: oh my god! you're palms...they aren't all black, they're white too!

 

me: erm...yeah my feet are like that too

 

guy: no way *too excitedly* can I see can I see?

 

me: not today dude

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