Chuck Norris Facts

[Miskiin-Macruuf-Aqiyaar]

They are parodying the bearded thespian. Ever finished watching a film Chuck Norris acted in?

 

I hardly ever watched any movies he was in, let alone sitting to watch it finish. And this was back when I was a boy and didn't even know Ingiriis and interested some action movies, but his action movies were ka dareey. Dadka ayuu yasaa, sida quraanjo camal ugu taagsanaayo people.

 

Same with that dude, what-is-his-name? Steven Seagal? Hardly watched any movie where he is the main character.

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Chuck Norris Facts:

 

• Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
• Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.
• There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
• The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.
• The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
• Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
• Most Anti-Bacterials claim to kill 99.9% of all germs. Chuck Norris kills 110% of them.

More "facts."

[N.O.R.F]

^^Chuck Norris's vietnam movies, i saw some of them when i was a kid.

 

Steven Segal is just pure Garbage!

[me]

^ What!

 

Steven segal is the man!

 

Hard to Kill, Above the Law, Out for Justice. I have seen my first Steven segal movie in a cinema in Kismayo in 1991 and have been hooked ever since. Chuck Norris is the most annoying actor. I am allergic to his movie and that serie walker texas ranger? damn....I will stop before I flip.

[Biixi]

LOL @ Chuck Norris kills people.

The only movie of Chuckie I remember is the one Bruce Lee kicks his A#@, then pulls the hair off his chest, and finally kills him.

 

Steven Seagel is too fake can't stand the dude...all of his movies have the similar story lines.

 

What about Charles Bronson, East Wood, Farlaajo Saanyo...Filimaantii kaawbooyaasha were the %$#@

[me]

I read that list, man those people are funny.

[Urban]

There's a whole website dedicated to these facts you know..

 

Chuck Norris puts fun into 'Funeral'

 

When Chuck Norris falls in water, he doesn't get wet.. the water gets Chuck Norris

 

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink

 

:cool:

[Cara.]

Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman survives.

[Zafir]

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

 

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

[Jacpher]

Another over-rated one is Jean-Claude Van Damme. Not as fake as those two losers above but I never liked his movies and that Cali governator too.

[Biixi]

^^^ I'll be back.

[Cara.]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

[Zafir]

Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

 

When Chuck Norris works out on the Total Gym, the Total Gym feels like it's been raped.

 

 

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

[Pujah]

Whoa wrong topic...didn’t realize we had Chuck Noris fan club

[Malika]

Loool, you lot make Chuck Norris sound so delicious!

[Zafir]

Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.

 

Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.

 

 

Chuck Norris is a vegetarian. Meaning, he does not eat animals until first he puts them into vegetative state with his fists.

 

Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.