NGONGE Posted September 7, 2007 Boys, boys, you shouldn’t be reading such MANipulative threads. Without knowing it, you’ll find yourself getting sucked in and falling for these illogical womanly demands. Where will that leave you, eh? Here is my advice to you, borne out of years of marital experience (not to mention other gems gleaned from countless meditative discussions in various coffee shops): Whenever you hear the seagull-like cries of a wife rebuking you for not telling her that you love her often enough, do what my friend Ali did! What did he do? I hear you ask Well, let me start at the beginning; This Ali is a bright and intelligent chap. He’s neither highly educated nor fervently religious. However, one look at his dazzling eyes leaves nobody that meets him doubtful of the man’s towering sophistication! Ali is married to a woman of the female type, I forget the name she goes by but rest assured that the omission of her name has no effect on the story. Still, some people like to identify with the characters in stories, so lets just call her Canab! In fact, allow me to digress and give free rein to my gushing stream of consciousness for a bit. I’m thinking of the symmetry, evenness and beautiful balance that go with the names Canab and Ali! I could just imagine their wedding night, as they sat on a couple of single sofa chairs that were transported from someone’s living room. Can just see the crowd dancing around them, music being played and a couple of helium balloons swaying behind them. Can you see it with me? See the two muttons-dressed-as-lamb standing at the back of the hall and dressed in matching diracs? Hush! I hear them whisper. Zoom in, cameraman. What are they saying? What are they saying? Aaah! I hear it now; they’re talking about those helium balloons. It’s quite a moving scene to witness their heavily made faces break into a smile (not to mention cracks appearing in all that caked makeup). Ha! They agree with me. They just said: Canab and Cali, perfect symmetry! Right, back. Much obliged for your generous indulgence. I was telling a story, was I not? Ah yes, it was Ali’s story and how he dealt with his wife’s relentless demands for expressions of his love. Of course Ali assured me that he loves his wife. But he argued that reminding her of that love was a needless and ridiculous burden. ‘I married a grown up woman, not a child’ he painfully protested before I calmed him down by gently tossing a full and fresh orbito on his rapidly fading daily dose. He went on to explain how he tamed that wild wife of his. I can see that you’re getting impatient here and, frankly, I’m not even sure if anyone has managed to read this far! Still, I shall continue and tell you what Ali did. It is often said that the best form of defence is attack. Ali tells me that he looked at the situation from all angels and wanted to formulate a solution that will fit the circumstances like a diamond necklace on a busty girl’s neckline (at this point I tried to tell him that this image was slightly out of kilter; on account of the fact that most people would not see the necklace and only notice the bust. But he ignored me and carried on talking). What he said he did, was to attack enthusiastically and incessantly. When he woke up in the morning, he would shake his wife awake and tell her that he loves her. When he left the room to go wash his face, brush his teeth and relieve himself; he told her that he won’t be long and that he loved her. As he got dressed, he told her that he loved her! He said that at first she looked suspicious and whined about him mocking her! But after he pulled her up, placed the palms of his hands on her shoulders, looked deep into her eyes and told her that he loves her, all her suspiciousness evaporated and she was a woman walking on air. Ali said that this last incident and his wife’s elation about being told that he loved her would have allowed him (if he wanted to) not to bother about uttering any expressions of love for at least a fortnight! But he was a man on a mission and victory was within sight. What he did, is when he got to work he phoned her and told her that he loved her. During his lunch break, as he munched on two bricks with cheese in the middle, he phoned her and said that he loved her. He carried on with this charade for two more days. Then on the third day and as he got back home from work and shouted the words: ‘darling, I’m home! I love YOU!’ he noticed that his mother-in-law was sat in the living room. This (he says) was an unexpected bonus! He immediately started welcoming the M. in L. singing out words such as ‘ welcome the great woman that gave birth to the love of my life’, ‘our house is blessed, my eyes are moistening up at the thought that: here sits the source of my beautiful river of a wife’. He says that the M. in L. was startled and (like her daughter) she thought that he was mocking her. But that the daughter quickly set her mother’s heart at rest and explained the position to her. The mother sighed deeply and (he believes) allowed a tear to sadly trickle out. Ali could have stopped right there and then. He now had a very powerful ally that witnessed him expressing his love for Canab. He needn’t do anything for months on end. But Ali is not the type of man to leave a job unfinished! The love expressions continued. They were accompanied by love letters, cards and gifts of all sizes! Canab was overwhelmed by it all but shrewd Ali still pressed on. He started waking her up in the middle of the night and telling her that he dreamt of her and had to tell her that he loved her. He started taking surprise days off from work and potter about the house waiting for her to walk past just so he could tell her he loves her. As you probably gathered from the last few sentences, Canab was starting to get tired of this taxing love. Though she enjoyed hearing her husband telling her that he loved her, she just wished that he’d cut down on the juvenile and adolescent parts. Ali says that she tried to explain this to him and that he sobbingly flickered his eyes at her and countered with the words ‘but I love you’! What’s typical of women is that when one is in trouble or has a marital problem she would hurriedly go to her friends and seek advice. That’s exactly what Canab did, according to Ali. He tells me with an ecstatic chuckle that Canab moaned to her friends about being over-loved, over-pampered and over-spoilt. He almost chokes on his toothpick as he recounts how the friends were oohing and aahing one minute and blowing raspberries the next! I told him that I understood the reason for the first part but didn’t understand the reason for the derision! He laughed some more as he accepted the lit cigarette from me and said ‘you don’t understand women, do you? They did that because they didn’t believe any woman could complain about being over-loved! They thought Canab was showing off! It seems that, he carried on telling her he loves her for one more week before she sat him down one day and pleaded with him to stop. He says he argued with her and said he was confused with her changing feelings. But that when he saw the steely determination in her eyes he thought it best not to ruin his marriage by these excessive expressions of love. He vacantly smiled as he told me that it’s been three months since he last told her he loves her. He describes the occasion and the scene, which incidentally turns out to be an exact carbon copy of the previous time when his M. in L. was visiting! He says that on this occasion he accidentally (and quite involuntarily) told his wife that he loves her but that she smiled back at him with dancing eyes and asked him to stop mocking her! Of course, the M. in L. was perplexed (seeing that she was a witness the last time) and couldn’t help asking her daughter what nonsense she was talking. Canab, Ali says, told her mother that too much love is not healthy for a relationship and that she already knows how much Ali loves her without him needing to tell her! He didn’t report the M. in L’s reaction this time. This is how Ali told his story with Canab. Of course it’s possible that he exaggerated a little, he was chewing at the time after all. Regardless, I’m sure you’ll all agree that the tale of Canab and Ali has a perfect symmetry. Abdi on the other hand..... 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Ibtisam Posted September 7, 2007 lool HAHA. Move over...Ngonge is back! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted September 7, 2007 Ali gives loving husbands a bad name. Rather than being clever, he's actually a mean, mean man. How much effort does it take to express your love, really? Not much and certainly nothing close to the effort he went to to ensure he never says those words again. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted September 7, 2007 ^^^I was surprised at the women, but then I thought why stress about a made up story.! Lool, p.s. I think she got her just deserved desert! after all she insisted, Mac sonkor I say. Maybe now she will allow him to say it (maybe not in those exact words) in his own time, not coerced and forced out of him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted September 7, 2007 ^^^ Did you not read her reply in the other thread? The girl is blind with the fog of love. I advice a heavy course of antibiotics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted September 7, 2007 Eh? Who is blind with the fog of love? Canab? :confused: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nehanda Posted September 7, 2007 LOL Ngonge. Lakiinse sirta haa fafiin o dumarka raga haa ku dirin. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted September 7, 2007 There is not such thing as a fog of love dear, let alone being blinded by one. Xaasidnimaad iska taa, and stop uu jeebing her damn husband in the makhaad! Tell him to go home with that antidote. I don't understand why a married man needs to be at, any other places other than his house after Isha salat, so she has something to complain about... I'm just not sure it is his romance or lack of telling her "he loves her" that is the problem. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted September 7, 2007 ^^ No such thing as a fog of love? You wait and see, wait and see. Val, I heard a rumour (spread by you if I may add) that you're in love! I chose to ignore your subsequent retraction. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted September 7, 2007 NG, Do I seem the type to partake in a mug's game? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted September 7, 2007 Ngonge: I meant in this case, I'm already blinded by that said fog of love, I mean it could not possible get any better, surely this is the ultimate perfection, there is nothing more for me to wait for or see! My new dress, accessories and shoes for 2nights wedding are perfect. The satisfaction of waiting & waiting for that perfect one, knowing that sooner or later, regardless of how long your browse, how many your try on, you will find THE perfect one. I’m so glade I waited, and kept looking. Lool @ rumour spread by her. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted September 7, 2007 Originally posted by NGONGE: This is how Ali told his story with Canab. Of course it’s possible that he exaggerated a little, he was chewing at the time after all. Regardless, I’m sure you’ll all agree that the tale of Canab and Ali has a perfect symmetry. Abdi on the other hand..... Ma qof marqaan kujiraa run sheego...Is Ali even married or he was hillucinating, again...Or are you sure the name is John and not Ali... No Somali man would put all this senseless effort to prove a point...Yaa jaad u cunaayo intuu waxaan dhan sameynaayo... He started waking her up in the middle of the night and telling her that he dreamt of her and had to tell her that he loved her. LOOOOOOOOOOL...Yea right...Dharbaaxada ku dhacdo, hooyadiis arooskeeduu arkaa... He started taking surprise days off from work and potter about the house waiting for her to walk past just so he could tell her he loves her. ehe ehe ehe ehe...Intuu ka shaqeeya? Surprise days off ku yeh...Sheeko... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted September 7, 2007 ^^^ Can just imagine how you felt as you read that No worries though. I expected all the reactions below: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
umu zakaria Posted September 7, 2007 NGONGE this might help you minimize ur stereotype. Qoute. Qur’an in Surah-Ar-Room Ayah 21 defines the husband-wife relationship as follows: And among His Signs is this that He created for you mates from among yourselves that ye may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts); verily in that are Signs for those who reflect. Prophet Muhammad PBUH also stressed these meanings: “The best among you are those who are best to their families, and I am the best of you to my family.” He also said “only the evil one abuse them, means women, and the honored one is he who honors them.” Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted September 7, 2007 umu, plz dont quote koran like fast food commerical...U and i are not qualified to do. all u getting is dumbi... aliens!! Poor Ali...who is wearing the pants here!! from day one, roles should be clear. i am husband u is wife. xalimos even do more when they marry foreigners. they go to works and do the wife thing 2. with faarax, u dont have to worry about the bread, he will bring the bread, can u do the wife thangy? it aint hard sistas... just use your head not the foolish heart. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
