Khayr
-
Content Count
2,884 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Posts posted by Khayr
-
-
I personally believe the men who go to Africa to get married are those who lack personality and the dating skills, their only motive for crossing oceans for marriage is the old marketing theory of Supply Vs. Demand!! Soon as they land in Nairobi the cutest and the sexiest girls (who by large could be cuter then those in canada) will be ready to kiss his ass just to marry him. So over night he will magically transform from a lonely heart to a big time playa with tons of girls chasing em..You know instead of trying to make things sound more negative, you are shinning a brighter light on the 'Imported Wifey' idea. Why would any man refuse the opportunity to be chased by "tons of girls".
Personally, I don't have a problem with talking with the opposite sex but I choose not to go that route b/c of I fear the wrath of Allah in this world and the next. I think many men are the same and they don't want to go the 'dating' route which is Haram!
Reality is what reality is and ALLAH doesn't present to you the dish that you want but rather he cooks up whats good for you; and you know whats good for you often tastes BITTER at the beginning. I agree with you on some points but I think that you truly haven't experienced what others have, Darman!
Until you are put in a situation wherein you are of age and its time for you to accept responsibility and take on a family, you can't fully comprehend the 'imported wifey' reality!
-
Salaamz,
'Be harsh on yourself and tolerant towards others'
I don't think that any man should question a sister about 'How' she wears her hijab unless you yourself look visibly muslim (i.e. Wear a full beard, muslim cap and long shirts!) and experience similiar hostility and alienation.
If more muslims were tolerant of the sisters that you are talking about, then they would feel that there is a support system for them out there and that they can endure the alienation from society b/c the muslimah next to her or the muslim brother next to her in class is being alienated by everyone else b/c he wears a white Jalaba and a cap at the Tuesday night lab.
-
Salaamz,
I am curious to know how somali sisters feel about somali men not wanting to marry somali women from the West (i.e. England, Canada, Holland, U.S. etc.). A sizeable population of Somali men choose to marry somali women that are not located in the West but are in Somalia or the Gulf. Whats the somali female attitude about this? Why do you think that somali men take this option? (This can be answered by both genders (M/F)
For me personally, I was thinking about marrying a somali sister who lives in Canada. From my experience, I have encountered that the sisters from here have a very intrictly drawn up, Michael Angelo type masterpiece sketch of what their husband is and if he doesn't meet the 34 page list of requirments then he is not marriage material. Trust me, I mean ALL REQUIREMENTS!!! Women raised here grow up with very unreal 'holly-bollywood ' expectations.
So b/c of this, some men (by process of frustration!) go out to Somalia and get married there. (Don't tell me that I am asking you to lower your standards, cause trust me there are alot of brothers out there who have good jobs, stable and good muslims!)
Another thing, from my experience, I think that the prospect of marrying a sister who has an OSAP loan (Univ./College Loan) to be scary. That means more debt on top of debt. I know that there are some nice sisters that are in post secondary, but they pick up these massive loans. That doesn't help one bit. Halimo in Burcao or Hargaesa doesn't have none of dat, so why not go to here.
I am asking this b/c my views are changing and
I am seriously contemplating marrying a sister from Somalia or the Gulf.
-
-
'YOU KNOW, JUST GAVE ME A WORD AND I'LL TELL YOU IT'S ORGIN AND MEANING IN GREEK'-
MY BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING (Just seen it!)
-
Salaamz
The best du'a is done non-verbally!
In your khuluq (your being). In the Seerah, it was the rasul's (salallahu calihye waslim) character and being that attracted people to Islam and made the bond of the sahaba stronger.
He (salallahu calihye waslim) didn't spend all his time in arguments with the Quraysh b/c you can't convince people through debates.
There is an ayat in the Quran in which ALLAH addresses his rasul (salallahu calihye waslims) and tells him that if you had all the money in the world, you would not be able to unite their hearts, but its Allah who unites hearts.
If the deen of Islam and the sunnah of the rasul (salallahu calihye waslim) premeates through your life and everything you do, then people will become more attracted to the deen b/c of your being, b/c you embody those teachings in your character and conduct.
If someone sees that you do the same things that they do and look and dress like they do, how can they be convinced by your words or any material books that you give to them.
The muslim should be a da'ae for his/her deen, meaning that they should be conscious AT ALL TIMES that they are always representing Islam all the time whether it be coming to work on time or trying their best in a pick up football/soccer game. The Sunnah was COMPREHENSIVE and not based on verbal arguments. If the latter was the case, then the rasul (salallahu calihye waslims) would have just stayed in the masjid and just prayed salat so that the kufar could be defeated, instead of going out in the battle field or spending many sleepless nights digging trenches.
-
Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights because they can't see each other using sign language. After several nights of fumbling around and misunderstandings, the wife decides to find a solution. "Honey," she signs, "Why don't we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left breast one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my right breast one time. "The husband thinks this is a great idea and signs back to his wife, "Great idea, Now if you want to have sex with ME, reach over and pull on my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, reach over and pull on my penis ... fifty times"
-
Salaamz,
Ahhhh! This SARS thing would have come in handy for me when I was in Universit, considering that its Exam season.
I am curious, did any of the nomads who are in school take advantage of this SARS hysteria and delay and exam or two
-
John just graduated from clinical psychology and opens his first office. After some successful advertising he is astounded to have nearly 300 people wanting to be in group therapy. John decides to rent a big hall and invite the entire group. To break the ice, and to get the therapy started, John decides to ask a show of hands how often the attendees had sex. He first asks for a show of hands of all the people who had sex almost every night. A modest number of hands were raised. He then asks, how many had sex once a week? This time a larger number of hands were raised. John then asks how many had sex once or twice a month? Again a few hands were raised. After John polled his group several more times he noticed one guy sitting off to the side with this huge beaming grin on his face. John noticed that the guy never raised his hand, so he asked him how often he had sex. The guy said, “Once a year!” To John's dismay, he responds, “Why are you so happy getting sex only once a year?” The grinning guy responds, "Tonight’s the night!"
-
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of
me life, between the legs of me wife!"
That won him the top prize for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the best
toast of the night." She said, "Aye, what was your toast?"
John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church
beside me wife."
"Oh that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of John's toasting buddies on the street
corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize, last
night, with a toast about you, Mary.
She said, "Aye and I was a bit surprised me self! You know, he's only
been there twice! Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."
-
Salaamz,
My nasiha (advice) regardings such a situation is to try to distance yourself from that person. You don't cut off ties with them completely, but you let them know that your not down with their behaviour through silence. If done probably, it will be noticed! Words are not enough and usually get mistinterpreted the wrong way.
-
Salamz,
Would you pray behind an Imam at a masjid that was Shia? Salafi? Naqshabandi? Would you go a jummah to another madhab lead masjid?
You know sometimes when I'm reading a hadith and the prophet (salallahu caliyhe wasalama) shows in his life that he prayed differently, did things differently, was flexible with the Sahaba etc. If he (salallahu caliyhe wasalama)wasn't narrow in his life and dealings with his sahabi and there have been so many interpretations regarding his sunnah and its methodologies, then what Alim has a right to say that one aspect of the Sunnah is right and others are to be reject (b/c they don't understant it!!!)
Subhanallah
-
Muslim-Mumin
-
" I beg to disagree with your scrutiny of the religious sects. First of all let me say this I myself do not associate with any sect or religious group other than Islam. But the analysis that we should not debate and discuss the ideological differences of the Muslim world concerns me. The fact that we should blind ourselves and let the difference sort itself out and we should not refer back our differences in to the Holy Book is far more damaging and dangerous than the discrepancies itself. "
Salamz,
To say that you don't associate with a particular school of thought in Islam is to say then that you don't follow Islam and don't care about it.
So what you are saying is Asinine.
I don't think that in my writing that I have said that we need UNIFORMITY in Islam. Meaning lets forget everything, and thing the same way in everything. Thats not realistic and the Allah shows us this throw his creations. He has created people with different forms and different capacities. To try to square everything is unrealitistic. What I was saying however is that inshallah, most muslims have spent to much time worrying what another muslim might be doing and have forgotten that the real danger is not the next muslim but the Kafr and in particular today-Secular Democracy.
You used the Afghanistan example, well not all muslims were for them. The Iranians weren't going out of there way to get help them and how come last yr. when the afghans were being massacred, didn't muslims support them as much as they did during the war with Russia. Why?
Differences in opinion and thought are natural, but as muslims, as long as we agree on the fundmentals i.e. Allah is One, Muhamed (sallalhu caliyhe waslim) is his Messenger, the 5 pillars of Islam and 6 pillars of Faith; then we should be able to cooperate especially against outside forces such as Modernity and Secular Democracy.
The situation of the Ummah reflects the individuals that make up the Collective.
Question: Is there an Islamic Political Theory?
-
1800s'-Uthman Dan Fodi
-
Food----Thought
(You know this can go on for a very long time.
I hope that people look at previous words before posting there, to AVOID REPETATION. Otherwise this game gets boring and repetitive.)
-
Salamz,
I think that this is a Barakh for the Ummah.
Why? So that others who have been sleeping can awaken to the realities and feel the emotions that some of you in here are feeling.
By sending such punishments to the muslims in this dunya, Allah is giving Muhamed's (Salallahu caliyhe wasalim)Ummah another chance to redeem themselves.
The Muslim Ummah is the only religious community that continues to stand up to modernization and all its corrosive ways.
So don't dispair. Be thankful, that Allah is giving you and I the opportunity to remember him again and inshallah for longer periods of time. Surely enough, we have forgetton him too often.
-
Gardheer---Sunna
-
Salamz,
Personally I would recommend for any student attending post secondary school i.e. University, College etc. to get married.
If you think that the people in high school are Jahils, wait till you reach University. Thats when ideologies are imprinted on you from left and right and campus life outside of the class is pure promiscuity. Meaning all people are doing is trying to get with each other. SEX, SEX AND MORE SEX is on every students mind.
If you get married inshallah, as a student you will be able to focus better on your studies. Since marriage forces responsibility on you, it will have inshallah have a positive effect on your academics.
I knew this brother once and he was a very playful but disoriented Farah. He met this sister in his program who was a practicing muslimah. They hung around at school doing assignments together. In the summer time after the first yr. (Can't remember the exact yr.), they got married. When I saw the brother the next yr., he was sporting a beard, academic attitude had changed and was much more up beat.
Anyways, hope inshallah you can get three cents to my two cents.
Fi Amanallah
-
Children-Barakah (Meaning Divince Grace, Blessing etc.)
-
I want to know what others thing and what mode of thinking they fall into.
Do you agree or disagree of my assessment?
I think that inshallah this is a very important topic that hits at the nook of the problem with the Ummah.
When nomads in here ask why is such this and like that, it can all be related to this topic.
-
Salamz,
Ameenah look what you started
Nuff Serial Killers roam in here thats for sure.
I won't mention any names for personal reasons
-
Muslims----Wimps
(To make this game fun, please lets not try to repeat the same words over and over again!!!)
-
"WITH EVERY HARDSHIP COMES EASE"
Let me put a bright spin on things for you inshallah.
You're still sane, a believer (inshallah),
You have all your senses
You can walk, talk, hear, taste,see.
You have a roof over your head. So your not homeless.
You are not dying of starvation.
Let me sum up a story for you.
There was a Sahabi, her name was Umm Salamah and Her husband and her had to migrate to Ethiopia to seek refuge from the persecution of the Quresh.
The muslims at that time were very small in size.
Weeks went by and the muhjirun remained in Abyssinia (Ethiopia). Now the people there were Christians. Umm Salamah's husband decided to leave Islam while they were staying in Abyssinia (Ethopia) and become a Christian. So Umm Salamah and her husband got a divorce. Now here is Umm Salamah in a far distant land b/c some man from the Quresh who claims to be a prophet sent her husband and her there to seek refuge. Her husband abondons her and he is an Apostate (One who leaves the religion).
Imagine the hardships that she was going through.
Yet through it all she remained a Believer (Mumin).
When the rasul (salallahu caliyhe waslim) heard of this, he sent her a letter asking for her hand in marriage.
Now you and I live in this 21st century, so how can we complain to Allah when such people like Umm Salamah preserved and was tested with more trials and tribulations.
PATIENCE AND PERSISTENCE, MY DEAR!!!
COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR RABB (Lord) more and more.
Don't be afraid to shed tears to him.
-
Popular Contributors
Demanding Professionalism in our Masjid..!
in General
Posted
Well from what you write, you make Islam sound like its something mundane and archaic and not practical and holistic. Was the Sunnah of the Rasul (salallahu caliyhe wasalim) limited to doing rituals? Was the masjid only used for salat?
The masjid is the focal point of the muslim community and the Imam and the Masjid are a reflection of the people.
To answer the question of why the Imams are like this, it is b/c the people want them to be like this. They don't want a True Imam-Spiritual Guide (and Spirituality is not conformed to just prayer but to every aspect of your being whether it be how to deal with a difficult manager at work or how to deal with your enability to communicate with your family memebers).
Any time an Imam in these local masajids have tried to do more than lead salat and give Jumma Khutbahs that often don't reflect the living realities of what the Community is going through, they have been rebuked and fired by masjid council memebers. These Imams are considered as Payroll Imams that can be traded by another Alim. After all Medina is manufacturing them a dime a dozen. A few yrs and you can become a well manufactured Spiritual Guide!
In anycase, if you don't have an alternative solution, I suggest that then you should stay quiet and not try to cause fitnah in the masjids and muslim community.
One solutions is that you can seperate yourself and gather with others who share similiar ideas and views and beginning to do things the old fashioned way-Seerah style. Which means alot of sweat and tears. Believe me!
"IF YOU'RE COMFORTABLE WITH YOUR ISLAM, WITH THE LIFE YOU LIVE, THEN THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU."