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Office jokes/shenanigans

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What do you do when your an assistant is using the damn photocopying machine.....


Would you..


1. Wait politely and let him finish the work


2. Inform him of the donuts and chocolates that has just come in as a diversion


3. Tell him that you have to do very manager/officer things and so need it asap


4. Threaten to leave your job and give up on life altogether if he does not leave.


5. Cry

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Most useless teams/departments


IT and Finace - and yet without them the ship sinks.....they r like a bunch of weirdos that cannot stand anyone but IT and Finance. You ask for a spreadsheet or help with get a reply which usually consists of explanation of how u you do it urself and nothing on why they wont do it for u!!!


ME: My pc is playing up

IT: Switch it off and turn on again

ME: That has not worked

IT: Have you tried to switch it off and switiching it on again...

(saying this as if this is a different sugesstion to the first)


ME: Whats the underspend of the budget

Finance: Work it out yourself

ME: Okay but ofcourse in my head I am really saying ''I hope you fall over your feet and lose your ability to add things up


I mean it aint ma fault ur single right now.....and they know u rely on them the useless things


Big time solution: email your needs and copy the director into it....usually works..they come running


Sorry I am letting out steam

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