stpaulchick

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Everything posted by stpaulchick

  1. George: Condi! Nice to see you. What¡¦s happening? Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China. George: Great. Lay it on me. Condi: Hu is the new leader of China. George: That¡¦s what I want to know. Condi: That¡¦s what I¡¦m telling you. George: That¡¦s what I¡¦m asking you. Who is the new leader of China? Condi: Yes. George: I mean the fellow¡¦s name. Condi: Hu. George: The guy in China. Condi: Hu. George: The new leader of China. Condi: Hu. George: The Chinaman! Condi: Hu is leading China. George: Now whaddya¡¦ asking me for? Condi: I¡¦m telling you Hu is leading China. George: Well, I¡¦m asking you. Who is leading China? Condi: That¡¦s the man¡¦s name. George: That¡¦s who¡¦s name? Condi: Yes. George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East. Condi: That¡¦s correct. George: Then who is in China? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir is in China? Condi: No, sir. George: Then who is? Condi: Yes, sir. George: Yassir? Condi: No, sir. George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone. Condi: Kofi? George: No, thanks. Condi: You want Kofi? George: No. Condi: You don¡¦t want Kofi. George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N. Condi: Yes, sir. George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi? George: Milk! Will you please make the call? Condi: And call who? George: Who is the guy at the U.N.? Condi: Hu is the guy in China. George: Will you stay out of China?! Condi: Yes, sir. George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N. Condi: Kofi. George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone. (Condi picks up the phone.) Condi: Rice, here. George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?
  2. The following exam was administered to gangsters as their version of the SAT, this version is known as the official GAT (Gangsta Aptitude Tess)... 1) You just robbed som jack mo fo with $20 in his wallet. You can buy: A. A dime and two 40's B. A new pair of Fila's C. Dashikki down the block D. Yo mama 2) It's tha end of da monf again and da man is on your jack for da rent. You: A. Bust a cap in his ass B. Say, "Shit man, why you all up in ma bidness?" C. Have anuther kid on welfare D. Yo mama 3) You and ya holmes are banging down da block when yall scam da uther mo fo's commin your way. If ya both jaking your hydros, and both yall draw yur gats, which of da following happens: A. Shit goes down in da hood B. Ya check yur colours and let the cop-killers fly C. Shit man, I do'no maff D. Yo mama 4) You drink haff a 40. How much is left: A. Haff B. Da uther haff C. Zum mo D. Bout enuff to jak yo mama 5) You, beein da shit you are, dress yo self in da morn in which of deese: A. Yo Tek 9 with da Raiders hat B. Da AK47 with yo Fila's 6) Tiz yo 21st birfday. You: A. Hook up with Dashikki down the block and treat her to MceeDees B. Treat yo self to crack, ice cream, and 40's C. Gaffle da man D. I do'no maff JOG-MAFEE 7) Wher iz da mutherland at: A. Afrika B. Mehico C. Compton D. Souff Centra E. Yo mama 8) What am da capita of California? A. Da Hood B. Compton C. Compton D. Compton ANALAMA-G'S 9) Tek 9 : Gatt : A. Yo mama : Dashikki B. Fila's : Nike C. Tu pac : Barry White D. St. Ive's : Colt 45 10) Malt Liquor : Da Chronic : A. Da Man : Da Systum B. ReeRun : MC Hammer C. Fat Albert : Shaft D. Yo mama : Dashikki NOW LOOKIE HERE FOO. I GOTS TO AXE YOU AN EXXAY QUEXTIUN: IN 25 WURDS MO O LESS, TELL UZ ME WHO AM DA MAN? So dat we may give uh you yo cowrecked sco, sine yo tag here!