Hello trollers! I haven't gotten much sleep the last couple of days. The top of my head feels...fizzy. I mean, unless timahayga aan jiidjiiday that day I'm not normally aware of my skull but today it's definitely right there.

I'm going to tell them terrible jokes. Cringe-inducing puns, eye-roll-worthy gags, stealthy multi-component pranks. By the time they are four, I expect full reciprocity. I want them to tiptoe down the stairs every morning holding a shirt over their heads; and of course they should skip the last step to avoid the booby traps. They should do a quick chemical analysis of their canjeelo before eating breakfast. No need to mention that they should double check every fifth homework problem I help them with in case it turns out to be a groan-worthy math joke. At my funeral, I expect them to look suspiciously at the coffin and poke my arm a few times to make sure I've truly kicked the bucket before settling down to mourn.

Sure, but keep in mind that I was young and restless Dear Diary, Today is 9/9/99 9:09:09. Well, actually it's 9/9/99 9:10:55, but that's only because I had trouble with the pen, and then I dropped you, and then McCormick asked a question and I had to look attentive for a second. Ecology 101 is SOOO boring! If I have to calculate the effect of roundworm infestation on the population density of marine snails in the estuaries of Tasmania one more time I think I will scream. You know, I don't think I'm going to make a good environmental activist. Even though nothing is more romantic than tying myself to a tree and defying the bulldozers that want to turn a beautiful sequoia (sp?) to toilet paper next to the man I love. Which reminds me, in anatomy class the frog I was supposed to dissect was completely ruined by my useless lab partner Matt. Honestly I don't know how that blockhead can even function, most of his mental processes must be dedicated to running his hand through his hair. But he is cute though. But he's dumb. But he's so cute. But dumb. Cute. Dumb." Then there are some doodles, a tragic attempt at drawing a half-dissected frog and an even more atrocious drawing of this Matt person. I don't even remember him now

^It doesn't actually. Just because one method works, doesn't mean that it is the only method that could work. I completely agree with you regarding the roles of men and women in FGM. It has always been "women's business", and only by educating women can the practice come to an end. Nice find.

I still remember what I was doing on September 9, 1999 at 09:09:09. I was noting down in my diary: "It is now 9/9/99 9:09:09"

What you need is a professional who can show you the robes. There's this guy called Dmitri, a real player, knows how to get the ladies. Let me see if I can find his number...

^I'll try. I admit I used be a little anxious about the 2000s too, but they turned out alright.

Originally posted by Abraar: Correction. I am not the head of sexual Exploitation and Abuse (SEA). I am the head of prevention of SEA. But when I want to be cheeky, especially when I pat some girl in the office and they give me a look, I say remember, you can only file your protest with me. I am the Head of Sexual Exploitation!

But that's too long! It doesn't lend itself to casual chit-chats does it? Every day you say things like: My car is a Ford Focus Twenty-fifteen, My cat was neutered in twenty-fifteen, I saw Elvis at a gas station in twenty-fifteen, I was married to a midget between twenty-fifteen and twenty twenty two. It's just jarringly formal. And how is it random? You can clearly see the thought progression :mad:

LOL. Be still my heart. ScarFace, you're just jealous because JB is one of the few men who doesn't have something wrong with him

Hello trollers. I suppose not many American trollers will make a showing today. Ngonge, you're still in an Internet 1998 state of mind. I just thought of something. How will people abbreviate 2015? Oh nine rolls off the tongue, Eighty-four seemed natural, but will someone say "Back in Fifteen?" Just doesn't seem right.

Che, what embarrassing personal detail did your doctor reveal about you? CL, let's see. Who is puffed up full of air and talks funny? Who is prickly and rolls up into a ball if annoyed? Hi Val! (bye Val ) You and Che remind me why I hate living in big cities, where someone giving up their seat for you is reason to take your finger off the nuke button. Here, it's the opposite, if anything. The other day a guy got up and offered his seat to a woman. She said no thank you. He insisted, she said that she was fine. They rode the bus the rest of the way standing. I could see another guy eyeing the seat and wondering

Watching an interaction between CL and Ngonge is like watching a fight between a hedgehog and a helium-filled balloon Morning trolllers! Today someone has renewed my faith in humanity.

Originally posted by Khayr: quote: Originally posted by Arac: It's a strange game, the only winning strategy is not to play. and thats why you on the farm team for 20+ years and never been called up to PLAY. If the alternative is stocking up on baby wipes and back braces, I think I'll sit this one out!

I've gotten so used to Ibti-Somali that I not only understood it, but I didn't even need to translate it in my head Feel better Ibti, or I will hurt you! Honestly Ducaysane, must everything be about that! Er, never mind. You actually did post a relevant comment free of double entendres this time

^Yay! Now I can blame you for not getting any work done What the hell is wrong with Gmail? If you have multiple emails going back and forth with different people, half the time it's hard to figure out who is replying to who. I was about to hit "send" when I realized the email was going to the person I was complaining about

It's 15 minutes after 5 GMT, so I expect all the Londoners will evaporate. Ciao ya'll! Ngonge, nope, not from Gedo. I heard they eat their oodkac with a straw there.

Ibti, so Fabregas IS doing that. I thought I was going crazy and clicking the same topic again and again! LOL@ no other keys on his computer are working. Some people in the politics section make me wonder if they have a word document open that they just copy and paste certain phrases from. Especially the not-so-veiled references to qabiil. "The people of Gedo", yeah right. Ngonge, when did you start acknowledging "smelly students"?

Ngonge and Johnny remind me of some wit who once said "No one will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy". Johnny, you should know Ngonge talks in his sleep, and he gives away all the male secrets and strategies Ibti, last time I was in London, some Farah said something rude to me (at least I think it was rude, it's only later that I was able to interpret that obnoxious Brit accent). Since then I've been thinking of all kinds of comebacks and retorts. If I ever show up in London again, I'm liable to get overwhelmed and just throw a can of baked beans at some maskiin skinny walking down the street Juxa, don't lose hope dear. If you need someone to to cajiin someone into submission, let me know. *Looks fierce*

Hello trollers (I should add "trollers" to the browser dictionary) Ibti and Juxa, what are you two plotting? There's constant talk of arranging this, paying for that, consulting this other...

American blacks (especially from the south) should do the same! Go to Canada and apply for asylum, show those Canadians up Let's see if the Canucks would be as confident offending their southern neighbor.

Buuxo, I'm working on the shifty smile. Nowadays people don't turn and run screaming when I grin. Women just hold their purses and children a little closer, and old men just discreetly scoot past a little faster on their walkers On the other hand, I heard that once, Ibti stepped out of Barclays as the bank president was getting out of his Jaguar. She smiled absently, he handed her the car keys and was up in his office before he came to his senses. But he was too embarrassed to do anything and now takes the subway.

^Sorry LOL @ Kir. It's true, "spoilsport" is my middle name

^I don't have your smile :mad:

Hello trollers. I forgot that I planned to sleep in today. *Yawn* Off for mid-morning coffee hunt. I sense a fresh pot brewing in the staff break room, time to remember the nice cleaning lady's grandkids' names...