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Viking

Never mind the Ballacks - Heavyweight criticisms

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Following his average performance against Croatia on Tuesday, Brazil striker Ronaldo has once again been on the receiving end of some rather fattist criticism. Elsewhere, the Poles turn back the clock and try to wind up their hosts, and World Cup fever strikes in an unlikely location.

 

The rotund goal-getter was jeered off the field when he was substituted by Robinho (who, it has to be said, is about a third of the size of the big man) in the 69th minute, as Brazil lumbered to an unconvincing 1-0 win.

 

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And one of the main reasons for the Real Madrid hitman's poor performance was apparently his size.

 

"It was a torture to see him like a wobbling heavyweight, staggering around the pitch as if what was going on around had nothing to do with him," wrote Juca Kfouri, one of Brazil's best-known columnists.

 

"To control a simple ball seemed a Herculean task."

 

And as if being criticised for having eaten too many pies wasn't bad enough, the press back home went one step further to accuse, weirdly, big Ron of being 'weird.'

 

Former World Cup striker Tostao, writing for the Folha de Sao Paulo newspaper, said: "Brazil were slow and bureaucratic and only improved when Robinho came on for Ronaldo, who was slow and weird."

 

TRABANT MAKES COMEBACK

Ahead of the huge local derby between Germany and Poland on Wednesday, the visitors have been trying to provoke their hosts through that old favourite medium of the wind up - the newspapers.

 

The Metro published a picture of cult East German car the Trabant on its front page, alongside the caption, "The Germans Don't Get Everything Right".

 

The Trabant - a poky, box-like little runner - became a symbol of the inefficient communist regime in post-war East Germany, but has nevertheless has achieved cult status in recent years.

 

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Poland will certainly be hoping they can get it right on Wednesday against Juergen Klinsmann's side, as they try to beat their hosts for the first time in 14 attempts.

 

 

JAILHOUSE ROCKS AFTER HOURS

Inmates at several Pakistani prisons are being allowed to stay up late and watch matches from Germany way after lights out have been called.

 

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Residents staying at Landhi jail in Karachi, Pakistan's biggest city, are usually only allowed to watch the goggle-box until eleven o'clock, but special dispensation has been given to followers of football to stay up later to take in all the action from Germany.

 

Pakistan have not made it to this summer's spectacle, but with a large number of foreigners - most of whom are inside for drug-related offences - currently doing bird, interest is sky high.

 

"Prisoners are provided with cable television in a designated area. Some are very keen to watch the matches as their countries are playing in it. We've allowed some relaxation," said the superintendent of the prison, Anwar Mustafa told reporters.

 

KOREAN MAN SERIOUSLY INJURED

Forget Nemanja Vidic, Jan Koller, Gianluca Zambrotta or even Wayne Rooney, word spread on Wednesday of the first serious World Cup injury after a Korean man fell off a road sign whilst celebrating his country's 2-1 win over Togo.

 

The incident - which happened in Australia, where giant screens are accommodating the passion of thousands of football fans - comes as no surprise after police had warned supporters against "foolhardy behaviour."

 

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And, unfortunately, it doesn't get much more foolhardy than climbing lampposts in Sydney at one o'clock in the morning. The unnamed 25-year-old male fell amid wild celebrations, and is currently on a life support machine in hospital.

 

"While we appreciate the fans' desire to celebrate and have a good time, we would encourage them to do so safely," police inspector Chris Keen said in a statement.

 

NMTB wishes the fan a speedy recovery, hopefully in time for South Korea's next game against France, on Sunday.

 

HANG THE DJ

Staying with South Korea for the moment, the 'deejay' responsible for putting on the national anthems made a serious faux pas on Tuesday, by hitting the 'repeat' button by mistake and blasting out the Korean jingle twice!

 

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Cue many puzzled faces in the Korean team, and a lot of red faces amongst the otherwise extremely reliable German organisers.

 

Source.

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