SCORPION_SISTA Posted March 26, 2003 I know that somali people in general don't believe in true friendship between females and males, but let's say that two people beat the odds. So Let's say that a female or male has a good friend of the opposite sex, just friends never anything else. Now one of them marries, can they still continue be friends or not? for those People that are married here, would u mind ur spouse having a good friend of the opposite sex? Or would that indicate that ur partner doesn't trust you? bee bye!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legend of Zu Posted March 26, 2003 It has nothing to do with trust..but everything has to come to an end...and I think marriege kills friendship of the opposite sex (assumin as U said... if their friendship has beaten the odds)... Cheers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Captivating_SouL Posted March 26, 2003 sadly yes it did have to come to end'. We as females are just as same as male when one person has a friend of the opposite sex. I knoe friends were there for each other before you even met your true love but if you did want it to work; i suggest you tell you significant other that "hey this is my boi/girl and we were down for each other for yrs and i hope you can handle our friendship"...with that said, if you get anything negative from your "partner" that you aint feelin, approach it before it gets to more complex phase. And of course with time, if he said "hey i dont like you guys hangin out" the first couple of weeks,...no reasons why his views should change over yrs. *1 xxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sMiLeY Posted March 26, 2003 hmmmmmm well i think that it's possibe to be married and have a friend from the opposite sex..........but i'm sure there will be some difficulties .......i.e your husbnad/wife might get jealouse if u spend more time with your friend............i think the best solution would be to try to make your partner and your friend friends ...........i mean involve your spouse in your activities with your friend..........that way everyone is happy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lefty Posted March 26, 2003 scorpion Don't be so naive and fool ya self! There's no possible way that males and females become good friends. Just a normal friendship such only knowing each other is possible but never expect a great friendship with no string attached from the opposite sex. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SCORPION_SISTA Posted March 26, 2003 lol lol lol lol lefty. For others thanx for the input it's much appriciated. after posting this last night, i was watching the comeday channel, and there was this guy talking about opposite sex being friends. And he was like, that relationship is like applying for a job (for man) and employer(meaning female) telling ya this is a great resume but we cann't hire u. Although we will judge everyone that applies to this position by this standards. empolyers then asks if it's possible for them to call them so they can complain about whom ever they hire. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted March 26, 2003 The only female my husband could have relationship with would have to either his mother, sister, or aunt...PERIOD...lool I am just kidding, Seriously though, if my b/friend or husband eva had a friend of the opposite sex, she would have to be my friend too...If she is so sure that she only wants a friendship with my man, then she would have no problem being open and friends with ME... I guess what I am trying to say is that no matter how much I trust him, if I don't trust her, then there will be a problem... And when I say friends I mean, she would call the house every now and then; we would all go out every now and then...But if they are doing thingz together, and I am not there, then there will be a mucho problemo...Like going to the movies or dinner or clubing/partying without me; you can bet your a$$ there'll be some a$$ kicking...And I mean for the both of them... I hate those women or men who blame thingz on the other person, other than thier partner...N'way, I think I am going of topic...So let me end it here... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BORN_BRANIAC Posted March 26, 2003 kool_kat i couldn't said it betta good point.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Haaruun Posted March 26, 2003 The reality is that the nice friendship ends automatically as soon as one of them gets married...they are not at the same class anymore.....the married one usually gets busy with his/her mate and dives with in the family's responsiblities-while the daily routine of the other (single)person remains the same.....Marriage even effects the friendship of the same genders...let alon' the opposite sex.....No hard feelin' involves this kind of break up cuz it's no one's fault... Thats my kumi iyo taano Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted March 26, 2003 Haaruun, me really like your Kumi iyo Taano...Very well said... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A7LA-SHU Posted March 26, 2003 haarun good point.. coz i have seen that with my friends who are females and believe me ones they said "i dos" it was like everyone i don't know yo'll lol.. to answer this q... me personaly i wouldn't end my friendship with oppise sex or my girlfriends. coz i have known them way before his sorry a$$ came along. so is like they stay whether u like it or not dude.. plus i wouldn't mind him keepin his friends or even his ex for reals. coz think about it. if u married to this person that means u choose them over all those girls/guys u know.. so why should they be jealous over nothing.. i think of of u guys had good idea. make them become friends if there friendship is pure and nothing to hide u know what i mean.. that is all i had for the now. so peace n 1 luv Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lulla Posted March 26, 2003 i don't like the idea of my future husband being good friends with another female..i think the only good friend who is female should be me ,myself and i..lol.okay!..besides he probably won't like me been close to another guy..just like i won't like him been close to another female.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HONEY-D Posted March 27, 2003 I am with haaruun on this. The minute u become wife to sumbody thats when ur friendship with the opposite sex ends. But hey everything has to come to an end in this life aight. :rolleyes: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
StarGazer Posted March 28, 2003 Damn everytime I want to express my opinion, some1 else already had!! Oh well. Not to sound redundant but I agree with what the majority said here. I think the best thing for any1 to do is to discuss the changes that will occur once married. In other words, create new boundaries since change is part of the equation. It might help combat any animosity that can come out of in the event the two friends part. Friends come n' go, but family's there to stay!!! Life's a journey, there's no guarantee your friends will stick around till the end. Scorpion, wlc back grl haven't seen you around in awhile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SCORPION_SISTA Posted March 28, 2003 A lot of interesting perspective on this issue, i appriciate it much. I understand that things change as one marries and that's understandable, things even changes when one of friend is dating. But not end it all the way, i mean friends can make compromises or adjustments and still have that good friendship. I mean it isn't like true friends are falling out of trees now days!!! Now CLOWN you saying that really makes u sound shallow. I mean u basically saying that u would date anyone as long as she is good looking I mean u got to have other standards beside that to choice a girl u would date :confused: :confused: and besides would u waste a someone that's really a good friend to u for few months of romantic drama :eek: :eek: :eek: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
