IL CAPO

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Everything posted by IL CAPO

  1. Northerner, These days Muslims including Somalis do all sorts of un-islamic things Sxb! I heard that he hails from Ivory Coast and his parents are both Muslims but whether he is a devout Muslim or not only Allah knows but so far I can testify that he is far more professional than El Hadji Diouf will ever be. He (Diouf) was even dropped from the national team after he was seen clubbing the night away in Dakar the night before a crucial world cup qualifying match between Senegal and Liberia in Monrovia, I call him The Drunkard Master! . Peace.
  2. At school a classmate tells a boy that most adults hide at least one dark secret and that makes it easy to blackmail them by saying "I know the whole truth"- even if you do not actually know a thing. The boy decides to go home and try it out; as he greets his mother he says, "I know the whole truth!" his mother quickly hands him KSH 100,00 and says "Just don't tell your father" quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home and says "I know the whole truth" the father hands him KSH200, 00 and says "Don't say a word to your mother" very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the postman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying "I know the whole truth!" The postman opens his arms and says, "Then come and give Daddy a big hug". Peace.
  3. SisSade, Glad to hear that you actually Loved it. Kwaheri. nafta loooooooooooool you too. . Peace.
  4. Section6er, umeJuaje? nime sikiya Section 1 ni best kuliko Section Mbili paka Section Seven! . Kwaheri.
  5. It's a shame Ladies are starting to feel like worthless weight wondering when will a wise man come their way hoping to be held close cared for and relieved of stress wanting to say I do so she can tell everyone she's blessed she's not your average chicken head nor your Somali Female stereotype she'd massage your back for you after along day at work calls you nothing but noble man she is your loyal lover and friend reversing the roles in the bedroom making you see the stars and the moon. It's a crying shame that Somali men are starting to feel mistreated receiving mixed messages and feeling not needed wanting to have a family he dreams of a son it relaxes him when she dips it low makes him feel important when she cuddles unto him and caresses him feeling like one in a million not your average Somali-male stereotype he is a good person and a good man all he wants is a woman who is hungry to be loved truly by a real man who knows what his woman wants. Good Night Ladies and Gentlemen. Peace.
  6. Taipei - A lion attacked a man who jumped into the animal's enclosure and shouted "Jesus will save you!" at the big cat on Thursday at the zoo in Taiwan's capital. Cable TV stations showed the lion ripping a jacket off the man as he stood in a grassy enclosure that held two of the animals. Without panicking, the man fell back on a stone ridge, and the lion then jumped at him, biting him in the arm. The lion then clawed at his trousers before retreating. The man then calmly stood with his arms outstretched in front of the two animals. An eyewitness, Hsu Li-jen, told cable station CTI that the man shouted "Jesus will save you" at the animals. Guards drove the lions away with water hoses, and police shot the animals with tranquilliser darts. The man, identified only by his surname, Chen, then picked up his jacket and climbed out of the pen himself. He was taken to the hospital for tests. "He had bite marks both at the front and back of his leg," Doctor Wang Yao-ching told CTI. Another doctor said Chen, 46, also had psychological problems. "He took this dangerous action today because he imagined he heard voices" psychiatrist Teng Hui-wen told reporters, saying his case was still being investigated. P.S Maybe he should try that trick on Polar Bear next time :eek: . Peace.
  7. raula, LooooooooooooooL, Mama Ndogo,si-misled hata, ni kweli mapenzi wangu ni MALAIKA by name and MALAIKA by tabia. ati domo tamu...i can also walk the walk, najua ni Ramadani that is why i am Fasting . umeni chekesha Hakiya Mungu, wacha kunani piga BOMB pasi,Salaala Muhammad, kumbe wewe ni Hasidi, SARE JO . Kwaheri.
  8. Kool_Kat, The pleasure is all mine my sister. Peace.
  9. LayZieGirl, It is alright, let them do what they wish after all they are only our fellow Somali Brothers and Sisters so let us forgive them all my beloved Sister, let us give them another chance they will come right, I am sure of that. P.S Thanks for your precious time. Peace.
  10. Northerner, You are right but unfortunately these two teams and Liverpool have nothing in common. . P.S it was sad to witness what happened to Djibril Cisse, my thoughts and prayers are with him since the poor brother happens to be a Muslim,actually a far better Muslim than the Drunkard master El Hadji Diouf i heard. Peace.
  11. Fouzia_Bella, I appreciate your wonderful compliment my Sister and I am ecstatic to read that my words literally brought tears to yours eyes, forgive me because I didn't want to make you or anybody else cry, all I ever wanted is my Malaika to Love me just as much, is that too much to ask, I hope not. Take a good care of yourself. May Peace Be With You. Peace.
  12. Originally posted by OG_MOTI: ^^^ sxb ma jeceel baa kuhaya.. mise partneradat baa kudaalisay.. anyway all your Question my answer is NO is that bad? please tell me if it is... peace My Brother, Any one who hasn't experienced a true love in his lifetime is missing out a lot so I guess that should be good enough to answer your question of whether I am in love or not. We may have different personalities, different tastes or even a different dreams but at the end of the day we all want a same thing, which is to marry a good woman with a strong Iman and raise a family, you can ask that anybody you know male or female and I promise you they will concur on that. P.S I can understand why your answer to my Questions is plain and simple NO because if I am not mistaken in Cambodia it is next to impossible to find a Muslimah let alone a Somali Lady so I suggest you come down to Garissa as soon as possible and I will personally introduce you to my Sister Insha Allah and one more thing, don't worry about the 100 camels that (WE) pay as a dowry for (OUR) Queens, I am sure we will work something out. . SOO DHOWOOW MININKA MININKAAGA WAAYE. . Peace.
  13. IL CAPO

    Jokes

    Mombasa_QUEEN, Tafadali,ni Ramadani jo..wacha kunani umiza mabavu siwezi kucheka. jana imeoneshwa Watamu Beach, Giriama Beach, Mombasa Beach kwa Tv..ume cheki LooooooL... . Peace.
  14. LoooooooooooooooooooL na walendo wana fakiri kama sisi hatuna Sense of Humour, that was really funny:D . Peace.
  15. Five German in an Audi Quattro arrived at the Italian Border. the Italian customs officer stops them and tells them "Itsa illegala to putta five people in Quattro!" "Vot do you mean, it's illegal?" asks the German. "Quattro means four" replies the Italian Official. "Dumkopf! Quattro iz just ze name of ze Automobile, Des car is dezigned to carry 5 people" the Germans shout back. "You canta pulla thata one on me" replies the Italian customs officer, "Quattro means four, you havea fivea people ina your car and you are therefore breaking the lawa" then the German replies angirily "You ztupid Scheiwn! call ze zupervizor over! Scnell! i vant to spik to zumvone wiz more intelligence!' "Sorry, responds the Italian "He can'ta come...He'sa busy witha two guys in a Fiat Uno." Peace.
  16. Originally posted by Mombasa_QUEEN: Ilcapo unaongeya about change sina hata sumuni.lol leta Shilingi pasi kma hamna Sumuni. Peace.
  17. At a wedding rehearsal the groom approached the minister with an unusual offer. "Take this" he said and slipped the minister KSh10, 000. He added,"All I want is for you to, ever so slightly, change the wedding vows. Just leave out the part about me promising to love, honour and obey and forsake all others, being faithful to her forever." He walked away a happy man, then came the wedding day, at the part of the ceremony where the vows are exchanged, the minister looked the young man in the eyes and said "Will you promise to kneel before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman as long as you both shall live?" the trapped groom gasped, looked around and said in a tiny voice "Yes". After the wedding, the groom pulled the minister aside and hissed, "I thought we had a Deal". The priest handed the man his KSh10, 000 back to him and whispered "She made me a much better offer!" Peace.
  18. Originally posted by nafta: IL CAPO dont take it personal it would be nice to be sure of anything the way i am sure of everything including what and when i need to take something personal and when not to so for your case i knew it was the hunger and the thirst speaking rather than your head or heart but be careful though everybody isn't a happy go lucky fellow like MOI. Peace.
  19. Laughter and gossip are heard through the black night footsteps echo throughout the alley a young man in a beanie approaches a group of oldies sitting on a park bench. he pulls out something and releases a single squeeze in their direction. time slows down and the sound begins to speak. Here I go again like yesterday and soon to be tomorrow The booms released by auto how I gloom to see the sorrow. released by the boy in the man holding the steel proud while the targets at the steps don't have time to duck or shield, wow. Oh wait I remember it all now they disputed the past week and now he's back to get his back. i bet they didn't know this would be their last Gossip. ----------------KIBOKO YAO------------------------------------
  20. nafta, I take that as a compliment because i was once told that i am not even worth a Bullet. Peace.
  21. 1-People sitting on them and photocopying their buttocks cause 23% of all photocopier faults worldwide? 2-One out of every 200 women is endowed with an extra nipple? 3-The very first bomb dropped by the allies on Berlin during WW2 killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo. 4-Hippopotomonstrosesquippedalio phobia is the fear of long words. 5-When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red. 6-It takes 17 muscles to smile and 43 to frown. 7-The only country in the world that has A Bill Of Rights for cows is India? 8-The lists of ingredients that make up lipstick include fish scales? 9-Kenyan women work 35% longer than their male folk? 10-The average Somali woman going to a wedding spends 55 minutes getting showered, dressed and groomed. 11-Midgets and dwarfs almost always have normal-sized children, even if both parents are midgets or dwarfs. 12-Donkeys kill more people annually than die in air crashes. 13-If you go blind in one eye, you will only lose about one-fifth of your vision (but all your depth perception) 14-Indians were not allowed to play bare feet in 1954 soccer world cup so they withdrew from the tournament in Switzerland. 15-The "You are here" arrow on a map is called the IDEO locater. P.S I was told by the Admin that Termites eat wood twice as fast when reading my Topics.. Peace.
  22. 1-do you greet with and say Salam Alaikom to your partner every time you meet him/her? 2-Are you always an honest and truthful to your partner? 3-Do you remind your partner about Allah (S.W) and the day of Khiyama? 4-Do you pray 5 times a day and read Duah for your partner every time he/she's in a tight situation? 5-Do you reserve your best advices solely for your beloved partner? 6-Do you pay homage every time your partner does something special for you? 7-Have you ever taught your partner one single Hadeeth or a Verse from the Holy Qur’an? 8-Do you criticise your partner every time they make a mistake and hold a grudge against them for that or you accept his/her sincere apology and forgive them? 9-Do you listen and listen well to your partner whenever they give you an advice even when you didn't ask for it? 10-Do you always try to let your partner know that he/she means the world to you? 11-Are you fully aware of the fact that you have somebody else to think of now and not only about yourself anymore? 12-Do you provide a support for your partner every time they are going through a rough patch? 13-Do you always stand by your partner regardless the consequence? 14-Do you call your partner with cute and sweet names and never foul ones? 15-Do you consult with your partner every time you have to make a decision about your career or anything else? 16-Do you raise your voice to your partner every time you have a minor misunderstanding? 17- Do you respect your partner enough to apologize to him/her every time you step out of the line and say or do something that you know you shouldn't? 18-Do you still maintain the smooth communication that you established when you first met? 19-Do you listen to whatever your partner says with an interest and respect their point of view? 20-do you tell your partner how much you love him/her? P.S A worthy wife is far more precious than all the gold and jewels in the world, strength and dignity are her clothing while true love is her shelter. IL CAPO. Peace.
  23. Originally posted by iskey_baro: ^^^ you have a dog? I used to own a healthy 3-year-old German shepherd named Gomba he was a good dog, a far better friend and far loyal than so many so-called human friends i should say,until one day he got really sick and I took him to the vet. then they told me the bad news, they said he had an Ebola like virus and that was the main reason why he was bleeding furiously from the mouth, nose and the ears and they also said he had a 15% chance of surviving and that is when I signed his death certificate meaning I allowed them to put him down. Sorry Buddy.
  24. besbaaso, Naah i wouldn't necessarily say it is my breath because i have tried every trick in the book but still it just wouldn't stop barking at me "Woof Woof Woof" but i got my own theory though and until i prove it is legit i am not willing to let you know just yet but hang around one of these days i will let you know in secret. . Peace.
  25. hutaki Asali ya Sukari? ki Mkamba style. sawa tayarisha chapa pasi na usi niambiye huna change. take care of yourself too my dear sister. Peace.