Hi dearest sister VAgirl; I support what sis yasmin said...Family comes before everything, so if you cant impress them stick to your family and move on there are plenty of fish in the sea. He is not the only one you will ever love. I wish you good luck sista. ma'asalaam

Hi dearest sister VAgirl; I support what sis yasmin said...Family comes before everything, so if you cant impress them stick to your family and move on there are plenty of fish in the sea. He is not the only one you will ever love. I wish you good luck sista. ma'asalaam

Language Barriers LANGUAGE BARRIERS An Asian man walked into the currency exchange in New York with 2000 Japanese yen and walked out with $72. The following week, he walked in with 2000 yen, and was handed $66. He asked the teller why he got less money than the previous week. The teller said, "Fluctuations." The Asian man stormed out, and just before slamming the door, turned around and shouted, "Fluc you Amelicans, too!" The man thought that the teller said "**** you Asians". Wasalaam

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance... Only in Britain are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink... Only in Britain do Supermarkets make sick folk walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front... Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and put our junk in the garage. Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. Only in Britain do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight. Only in Britain do we use the word "politics" to describe the process of Government. "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures."

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day, he met a girl and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself, "She'll never go through with the marriage with me carrying on like this," so he made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Shortly after that they were married. A few months later, on the way home from work, his car broke down and since they lived in the country, he called his wife and told her that he would be late because he had to walk. On his way home, he passed a small cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. Since he still had several miles to walk, he figured he could walk off any ill effects before he got home. So he went in and ordered, and before leaving, had three extra large helpings of baked beans. All the way home he farted. By the time he arrived home, he felt reasonably safe. His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!" She put a blindfold on him, and led him to his chair at the head of the table and made him promise not to peek. At this point, he was beginning to feel another one coming on. Just as his wife was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang. She again made him promise not to peek until she returned, and away she went to answer the phone. While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but as stinky as a rotten egg. He had a hard time breathing, so he felt for his napkin and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. He raised his leg and RRIIIPPPP! It sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled worse. To keep from gagging, he tried fanning his arms a while, hoping the smell would dissipate. He got another urge. This was a real blue ribbon winner-the windows shook, the dishes on the table rattled, and a minute later, the flowers on the table were dead. While keeping an ear tuned in on the conversation in the hallway, and keeping his promise of staying blindfolded, he carried on like this for the next 10 minutes, farting and fanning each time with his napkin. When he heard the phone farewells, he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. Smiling contentedly, he was the picture of innocence when his wife walked in. Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner table. After assuring her he had not peeked, she removed the blindfold and yelled, "SURPRISE!" To his shock and horror, there were 12 dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

Salaams all; thanx to everyone for the +ive contributions to this topic.... LF... many thanx sister for your support...even thou i asked u the whereabouts of those sisters, but never mind! It's very surprising that only 10% of us (men) aged 24 or less are responsible when it comes to making a family, could u let us know how u came up with this statistics (i hope it is just imaginery). About the 'representations', it will be very very difficult as u mentioned that from day 1 u r taught that young men are immature... I think in that case i just have to wait till i reach that maturity age...24+. Ameenah... i aighnt confused or anything sis...never ask shimbir yar anything, always ask shimbir wayn, ok. Hadaan is micneeyo: I CAN'T PUT IT ANY CLEARER, I PREFER A GURL OF MY AGE OR LIL OLDER...hadaad u baahan tahay in aan aad isu micneeyo drop a lil note in my box n leave ur details behind. wasalaaaaam [This message has been edited by mataan (edited 02-01-2002).]

Salaams all; thanx to everyone for the +ive contributions to this topic.... LF... many thanx sister for your support...even thou i asked u the whereabouts of those sisters, but never mind! It's very surprising that only 10% of us (men) aged 24 or less are responsible when it comes to making a family, could u let us know how u came up with this statistics (i hope it is just imaginery). About the 'representations', it will be very very difficult as u mentioned that from day 1 u r taught that young men are immature... I think in that case i just have to wait till i reach that maturity age...24+. Ameenah... i aighnt confused or anything sis...never ask shimbir yar anything, always ask shimbir wayn, ok. Hadaan is micneeyo: I CAN'T PUT IT ANY CLEARER, I PREFER A GURL OF MY AGE OR LIL OLDER...hadaad u baahan tahay in aan aad isu micneeyo drop a lil note in my box n leave ur details behind. wasalaaaaam [This message has been edited by mataan (edited 02-01-2002).]

Faarax is 22 years Somali gizza living somewhere in the west. He has recently for a job in restaurant in the city. This following is his actual job application. NAME: I got 2 names: My Real name Farah Warfaa, the one on my passport is abdi mohamed SEX: Yes. Twice a week. DESIRED POSITION: I would love to be the CEO of the company but now anything that will pay for my 2 magin. DESIRED SALARY: However much you wanna pay me to top up my DSS doll. EDUCATION: Yes and No. LAST POSITION HELD: Senior Muqayil (if u know wat it is). SALARY: I forgot, I think it was something like £3.60 per hour. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: Building Tower blocks when I am high (murqaan) and destroying them in the morning. REASON FOR LEAVING: Suspended due to lateness and chewing on site. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: How many do u have first? PREFERRED HOURS: Anytime after 12Noon, thats when I wake up. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Depends what u mean. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I do but it doesn't run so I would rephrase ur question to: "Do you have a car that runs?" HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: yes and no. DO YOU SMOKE?: Smoke what?... Benson yes, weed no. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in Somalia with a fabulously wealthy wife who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: If I am not, you will not give me the job would you. SIGN HERE: Jama

Faarax is 22 years Somali gizza living somewhere in the west. He has recently for a job in restaurant in the city. This following is his actual job application. NAME: I got 2 names: My Real name Farah Warfaa, the one on my passport is abdi mohamed SEX: Yes. Twice a week. DESIRED POSITION: I would love to be the CEO of the company but now anything that will pay for my 2 magin. DESIRED SALARY: However much you wanna pay me to top up my DSS doll. EDUCATION: Yes and No. LAST POSITION HELD: Senior Muqayil (if u know wat it is). SALARY: I forgot, I think it was something like £3.60 per hour. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: Building Tower blocks when I am high (murqaan) and destroying them in the morning. REASON FOR LEAVING: Suspended due to lateness and chewing on site. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: How many do u have first? PREFERRED HOURS: Anytime after 12Noon, thats when I wake up. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Depends what u mean. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I do but it doesn't run so I would rephrase ur question to: "Do you have a car that runs?" HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: yes and no. DO YOU SMOKE?: Smoke what?... Benson yes, weed no. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in Somalia with a fabulously wealthy wife who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: If I am not, you will not give me the job would you. SIGN HERE: Jama

salaaaams; well mine is self-explanatory... i can see u r already figuring out... i am a twin so my family call me mataan and i like it... the other day i was telling my lil nephew who si only 3 yrs old about the originality of my name and i told him that i had another twin... guess what he said "...but abtiyo how comes u r not half") peace

salaams guys; Nin Somali ah ayaa wuxu usoo dhoofay UK 1990gii markaa Addis Ababa ayuu ka soo raacay diyaarad. Wuxu soo iibsaday (gatay) the latest suit and suitcase. Markay hawada soo marayaan ayaa waxa aragtay gabadh stewardess ah isagoo bored noqday. Xariifkan Asylum Seeker-ka ah waxa loo haystaa in uu yahay business man. Gabadhii intay ka naxday naftan miskiinka ah ayay u keentay Magazine. Xariifkow weligaa waxba maadan akhriyin, so upside down buu u qabsaday magazine-kii. Gabadhii ayaa intay yaabtay ku tidhi sidaa looma akhriyo, intuu fekeray ayuu mid ku dhawaa oo English-ka garanayay ku yidhi waar waxaad ku dhahdaa anagu hadaanu Soomaali nahay labada dhanba waanu u akhrinaa. Waxan is leeyahay gabadhii weli waxay u haysataa in aynu labada dhanba u akhrino. wasalaam

yeees sorry madame... my apologies haa walaal i am very late... anyway nice name, keep posting sister cos u r great wasalaam

Waad salaaman tihiin dhamaantiin I am doing computer engineering degree... In my university there are a lot of somalis doing all kinds of subjects...i am very proud of them. I agree wid with wat sis LadyFatima said about somali men being after young chicks...however i personally find that all or nearly all somali girls would like to marry a man older than them... I am fed up with phrases like "U r little boy bro" or "u r like my young brother to me". Even those girls of my age would say i am young and that they will only go for men at least older than them good 5 yrs. Maybe u cld help me wid the whereabouts of those chicks who wont mind younger bros sis... because aniga kabahaa igaga dhamaaday. i am out wasalaam all.

Waad salaaman tihiin dhamaantiin I am doing computer engineering degree... In my university there are a lot of somalis doing all kinds of subjects...i am very proud of them. I agree wid with wat sis LadyFatima said about somali men being after young chicks...however i personally find that all or nearly all somali girls would like to marry a man older than them... I am fed up with phrases like "U r little boy bro" or "u r like my young brother to me". Even those girls of my age would say i am young and that they will only go for men at least older than them good 5 yrs. Maybe u cld help me wid the whereabouts of those chicks who wont mind younger bros sis... because aniga kabahaa igaga dhamaaday. i am out wasalaam all.

hiiii my ppl; how many times have u lied to ur mom and got caught...why dont we share that with each other... i will be the first one to tell mine... take care cya

WASSUP PPL MY ONE I THINK IT IS SAD... IT GOES LIKE THIS Berigii aan Somalia joogay ayaa waxan iibin jiray Dukaan (shop) aabahay lahaa. Markaa aniga iyo saaxiibaday ayaa joogi jiray habeenkii. Markaa aad baanu u yar yarayn (8 yrs old), habeen anagoo sigaar cabayna ayaa waxa noo soo galay macalinkii dugsi quraanka iyo walaalkay (who is very strict). Anigu sigaarkii oo shidan ayaan jeebka gashayday markaas ayuu jeebka qiiq kasoo baxay. jeebkaygu wuu gubanayay kuwii kalena waa la qabtay. Subixii ayaa nala garaacay markaan malcaamaddii tagnay. Habeenkaa ka dib sigaar danbe afkayga maan saarin markaan xasuustona waan isla yaaba. Wasalaam

WASSUP MY PPL: NICE TOPIC. WOMEN PLAY AN IMPORTANT ROLE IN OUR SOCIETY SO THEY SHOULD HAVE THEIR SLICE OF THE BREAD. I AM NOT SAYING THEY SHOULD RUN FOR PRESIDENCY AND POSITIONS LIKE THAT, BUT THEY HAVE TO MAKE THEIR VOICES HEARD. THEY HAVE TAKEN A VERY CRUCIAL PART IN REGENERATING OUR COUNTRY, ACTUALLY I BELIEVE THAT IF THEY WERE RUNNING THE COUNTRY OUR COUNTRY WOULD HAVE BEEN IN A MUCH BETTER POSITION. EVEN THOUGH I HAVENT BEEN IN SOMALIA FOR LONG I KNOW THAT WOMEN IN BOTH BACK HOME AND IN WESTERN COUNTRIES HAVE MADE A GREAT CONTRIBUTIONS TO OUR COUNTRY...KEEP UP THE EXCELLENT WORK AND REMEMBER THERE ARE A LOT OF PEOPLE OUT THERE (me 1st) WHO APPRECAIATE YOUR WORK... ******* The next part of my message is for my sister who wrote the topic (Naag-qaawan): Marka hore, Salaan fiican iga gudoon walaal. Waad ku mahadsantahay topic-kan aadka u qiimaha badan. Runtii waan ka helaa topic-yadaada aad soo post garayso. Waad ku mahadsantahay. Ta labaad, walaal naanaysta aad la baxday waa mid aan fiicnayn (in my opinion). Anigu waxan jeclaan jiray in aan saaxiibaday magacyo u bixiyo markaa maalin ayaa nin baa igu yidhi magacyada xun-xun qofka bixiya ama la baxa wuxu ku geli karaa cadaab markaa maalintii laga bilaabo qof umaan bixin magac. Adiguna adigoo iga raalli ah walaal haday possible tahay iska bedel magacan. Haddii aan kugu gafay ama ku insult gareeyay please forgive me and I am very sorry cos I know I got big mouth. ONE LUV MA'A SALAAMA BRO MATAAN

looooooooooooool.... Waar dadkani way na beer firiqeeyeen. Walahi qosol baan la raftay. I understand the women bit cos blue dirac and red googarad are typical for our chicks. Laakiin waxan idin waydiiyay bakooradda maxaa lagu falayaa miyaa la dagaalamayaa. I have seen a tape of a recent aroos and thats exactly how the men dressed... wats special with the bakoorad guys.

nimcooooooy waad iga qoslisay althou u talk dirty. waad mahadsantahay keep the good work gurl.