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Chocolate and Honey

Apparently I’m going to hell?

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The Zack   

C&H, no wadaad can make a girl stay with a man that she doesn't want. Seriously, qofta iyadaa nin ku heysatee maxaa ka rabtaa? Brought from africa with his kids, his bills being paid, married another chick and still being wanted? The nigga has some qualities that we can't see!

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C&H why would your auntie's marriage issues on public forum? That's just beyond me. If I were you I would stop it right here and wouldn't add anything else. I hope you don't find my comments offensive.

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NGONGE   

Bloody women. You give examples of abused women and blame the wadaads for not giving them instant divorces yet I bet you have heard of lots of cases where people (wives included) blamed hasty wadaads for breaking up families. This is why I pay no attention to 'waxa la yedhi' stories and choose instead to defend the wadaads. They have a duty to reconcile families and ensure they explored all avenues before they grant a divorce. They know that in most cases, their opinion of the cuople concerend should not cloud their decision making. Immisa ***** fariid qaba, immisa maskiin balaayo qabaa..its the way of the world and couples choose/love each other for all sorts of crazy reasons. Furthermore, there are loads of people with too mich fadool who ruin salvagable marriges with their moralistic posturings.

 

p.s

C&H...your 'relative' waited two years before seeking a divorce? film hindi fooqal film hindi. icon_razz.gif

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She loved him. What can we say? Lol!

 

Geeljire,

I just asked the question, can she get divorced from him without consent? I didnt see any comments insulting HER per se. Could she have given him less chances? Yes!

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raula   

Your aunt is a good woman-genuine for raising the other kids and supporting him. But she needs to realize that love only will not leave her living a comfortable life w/such son of a G :rolleyes: As plenty have said, unless she has feelings :eek: for this immoral B :( she will be miserable and it will trickle down to the kids too. So, move on sista-and let the other woman deal with his problems. On top of that i would ask for child support by sending some investigative tapes (of his work-cab driver or not) to the judge,that is IF I AM REALLY DESPERATE or financially just making it. I could come up w/plenty of nasty words for the husband-but it eventually comes down to some dull-witted-"traditional"-right wing-religious fanatics/misguided or wannabes woman that stick around for such MORONS :mad:

 

Choco-Allah knows your destiny, but i can relate to your 'blood boiling'-Personally, I dont listen much the somali line of...'walaasha iskuma hubtidee....."-especially if it involves my sisters :eek: . Who knows-she could be crying out for help and you might just be the savior smile.gif and if there is abuse involved-SOMEONE WILL BE TAUGHT A LESSON.

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This is where MOST men have this issue with a woman's decision. Why must they "MAKE SURE" for the 10th time she needs a divorce

Dont you think you are generalizing? I dont have a problem if my girl decides to leave the house and asks for divorce,i will gladly give her papers.good riddance,i dont have to put up with her swinging moods and i will be free from her parasitic tendencies .ouch!

 

I mean it is not worth to spend the rest of my life with a nagging woman.

this might be a new chance for me to experience the joys of singlehood and get more experience with women and mostly importantly dig for younger ones!or i may start to do my masters which has been unluckily postponed by this nagging woman!

Nowadays,marriage is over-rated and it is worth mentioning that Marriage doesnt mean you are guaranteed of happiness,bliss or simply felicitous life.You can lead a happy life with out the burdens of marriage.

P.S

I cant comprehend why someone would actually marry another wife with out informing his first wife? or with out her consent.I find it very disrespectful personally,At least tell her and if she agrees,go for it hadey diidana do it anyways.

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BiLaaL   

Sad story. There is nothing wrong with seeking a second opinion. I'm sure she'll do that if she feels she needs it.

 

I feel for her and for the poor kids who have to endure this mess through no fault of their own. I hope it all ends in Khayr.

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Sikaawe   

...So she goes to the masjid and tells them. The sheikh calls the man and tells him his wife wants a divorce. The man says he has no intention of divorcing this woman and that he wants her back.

This a sad story even though I read one said of the it to judge. However, if this is true of the both sides of the story then the poor woman will automatically be diforced. I can understand that the so-called husband still wants keep her but she is not his property anyway and that does not work for him in this way, they initially agreed together to marry each other and so whoever wants to end it afterwards has the right to do so. For instance, in Islam if a woman wants to diforce her husband then she has the right to do so, there is no denying of her rights; if it really happens that she simply says that she does not want him and that it is her choice and she is no longer in love with her, then that is the end of the story she has the right to be diforced. She will automatically get diforced as long as she insists on her rights says whatever she has to say. She has the same rights as the man, period. There is no preferance to him whatsoever even thought he has to be the head of the family and the bread winner as well.

 

As for the children, in my view she is great woman as in this case she feels that those children are simply the sisters and brothers of her own. So, she is great to keep the family together without bothering what her husband had done to here.

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Ashkiro   

Sadly it is not that easy, you'll be suprised how many people including the religious heads make divorce for a woman very difficult in our islamic communities, this case seems to be the norm, as much as we like to blame culture it is ever present and Muslim women find it very difficult to get a divorce when the husband refuses. It's a sad reality. Instead of pointing the finger out this useless husband who clearly fails his obligations as both husband and father, the woman is blamed. Islamically he is not even married to her since he failed his duties in so many ways. Whatever happened in the past, is past she should forget about it and not beat herself up for it, she has the present, make the best of today and go to a different masjid to get the divorce, best she can do is learn from her mistakes and make the best of her life, look forward not backward. InshaAllah all the best to her and the children.

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Napoleon   

Stop being negative, I mean yea sure you're burning or freezing to death for the most part, but look at the positives, at least you get to meet the world's biggest villains in hell. You can play crazy eights with Hitler and Stalin, discuss reaganomics with Ronald Reagan, make tiramisu with Mussolini. The possibilities are endless.

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