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Born Friday

Sensitive Issues!

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Young Somali men and women at this day and age are faced with very confusing and sensitive issues, especially about sex! Although i personally think we are talking about sex more and are aware of our sensuality. Sexuality is a crucial aspect of human life and functioning. Many issues are interwoven together to form our sense of sexuality and sensuality.I want to focus on physical aspects regarding sexuality, namely illness and deseases associated with sexual activity i.e AIDS/HIV, Chlamydia, Syphilis, Herpes, Genital Warts,Lice and Craps, Hepatitis B/C and many more,.Its frightening to know that majority of our young people dont even think about these things. Because of the cultures we live in, we have adopted some of the values and views of our host nations. Its a reality that many single, men and women 18-30somethings are sexually active but very few practice safe sex!

 

I personally think abstinence is the only foolproof way of avoiding a sexually transmitted deseases, but at this day and age thats not a realistic solution. What we need most is to educate and empower young somalis to practice safe sex.

 

How would a young woman who is just getting married ask her future husband to go for screening?! She knows he has been premiscuous but how does she approach the issue without offending him? Just how many young people think about that before they get married?!

 

Do you really trust your significant other enough to have a safe sex with them?! Please let me what you think, any examples you know of and what should be done about this.

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Originally posted by Gacalo:

How would a young woman who is just getting married ask her future husband to go for screening?! She knows he has been premiscuous but how does she approach the issue without offending him? Just how many young people think about that before they get married?!

 

Like this:

 

Dude, u're gonna have to get yrself checked out. I wanna see the results too. The originals.

 

If he's admitted to promiscuity or any level of sexual activity, why would you offend him if u ask him to show he won't be passing something on to you. Never be embarrassed about asking for what u want. Catching something nasty or deadly is not worth not offending a beau. BTW, goes both ways. If u ask for a check-up, provide yours too. Exchange them like vows. That's how you stay safe- in a healthy marriage.

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WOW! educate who huuno? have u been to American schools or western schools, sex education is everywhere. Oh yeah,they'll even teach you how it works wether you like it or not. but people still go out of their way to contract some cursed-nasty disease all knowingly. besides this philosophy of teaching and preaching about safe-sex is fundementally flowed because it violates the very thing it is protecting and it also refutes our Islamic Law.

In my philosophy safe= no premerital sex. but whoever chooses to sample the cake should let their future partners know what they've been up to.

soryy honn, got carried away. lets get back to the topic; how do you ask your husband to get tested without offending him?

simple.

you go up to him and say;

sweetheart i love you and I trust you but for the sake of my sanity, i would like you to get tested so that we can start clean. if it makes him happy or less uncomfortable, you too can also get tested(unless you havent been arround da block, so the kids say).

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Get Up! Up Even the best fall down sometimes

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Chocolate i agree with you completely. The safest way is not to engage in a premarital sex at all, but how realistic is that? You have admited yourself despite all the sex education at school people still go out and have sex. You and many more might have been lucky to get sex education at school but what about the ones that haven't. You will be surprised how very little people know about this. Besides education is not only showing you how everything works and handing out condoms. Safe sex education can be reminding people of the dangers involved. No one is disputing it refutes or islamic laws, but so does riba, murder and many other crimes, does it stop people doing those crimes? I would say use religion as a tool to remind people it goes against our beliefs, values and faith. Discussing the issue more and not making this such a taboo.

 

And what about in the cases where men go to find brides from Somalia? Do those women make the same informed choices as you and i do? Do you think those women have had sex education? There was this case where a somali man infected several women in London just over a year ago. He was reported by a western woman he was having an affair with while he was married to a somali woman and had kids by her. The somali women refused to come forward " that was a personal decision and i respect that" the whole thing was tragic. I genuinely believe if it wasn't a taboo and those women were not afraid of the shame and vicious gossips they would have come forward, get help and help others too. Huuno there is no such thing as too much education.

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SeeKer   

^^^ Stigma stigma. We are a long way from tackling issues like these while we have boundaries like taboo and whatnot.

 

**just a thought**

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I completely agree with you,honn.I know it's very tragic to grasp what our people are going through. I was thinking about what u said about marriage and somalia. and come to think of it, somali men have always been promiscious despite their upbringings. so yeah, i think we should educate our people in the sense of discouraging them from such acts because of its threat to our health and Islamic morals. and the ones who disregard it,shall reap the benefits.in addition, women need to use common sense and trust their judgement. if someone's morals are too loose arround these issues when you guys are courting, they probably have problems as you suspected. so watch out girls!

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Get Up! Up Even the best fall down sometimes

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Nephissa   

How would a young woman who is just getting married ask her future husband to go for screening?!

You do know it can take up to 10 years for HIV to show up on any testing, yea?

 

Do you really trust your significant other enough to have a safe sex with them?!

Nah! Never having unprotected sex. Even with my husband, if I ever get me one of those.

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Jamelia   

Originally posted by Bishaaro:

Nah! Never having unprotected sex. Even with my husband, if I ever get me one of those. [/QB]

Erm...Excuse me for being intrusive but don't you wish to have children?

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Saalixa   

why would you be worried....

just put your faith in ALLAH and he would protedt you from such diseases. That is provided you stay away from the HARAM

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