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raula

shida ya matatu ni furaha ya mabaya

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^^^take it easy dear, zitarudi pole pole lakini zikirudi zitakuwa bomba zaidi,!!

 

Mie siku hizi napata doze yangu ya vichekesho on youtube kwenye kipindi ya ze komedi show. Wanavituko, yani wenda wazimu!!

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Oz   

^^LOL, WOL.. kasema; "Unaweza ukasema NDOO MIMI, kumbe wapi! radio nime nunua mimi, mwenzako ananunua cassette player/ kasema kanunua TV, couch unaweza kanunua wewe meza na carpeti chini akanunua mwenzako lakini ukambiwe niwewe umenunua, :D sasa lazima unaka sawasawa na mlango, kurupu wa kwanza etc.." :D

 

mbona hutoi shati, eh toa pia kofia, ah kipara cha pese hiki :D

 

This other one made me lough; waswahili husema, " Ukitaka kula nyama iliyo noona, kula nguruwe wa porini" kukula nofa magazeti ya mia mia? Didn't get it. ati nitakutoa nje tamaa yako inaanaza.

 

Mke rasta, Mbona huja mvua shati mzee small,

 

Shemeji, na vua shati hamna wasiwasi, na vua

 

Shemeji. :D

 

Mzee small, kwani vipi? ehe waambiwa wewe? LOL "Usivaye kibwaya ngoma haija pigwa".

 

Shemeji; nilifikiri ni mimi shemeji.

 

Mzee small, loo loo loo

 

 

Raula siku hizo ulikua comedian in Swahili and Soomali :D you've wasted that talent somehow.

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raula   

^^sija waste-i just reverted it elsewhere(as Sir Newton's law-thermodynamics-dictates) icon_razz.gif

 

Sasa leo nijskia na papa wemba & koffi. Who remembers this song :D

 

http://kurwajegozajebanawdupemac.wrzuta.pl/sr/f/2CukAV6FDqS/african_music_-_papa_wemba_-_zaintoin_zo uk_soukouss_koffi

 

Yaani we use to change the words to swahili, for instance there is a part where they say..something along the lines of "sanduku na makamba"

:D;) But the last part when the music breaks and it starts this fast beat..salaala! yaani i am almost sokota kwa kiti saa huu.

 

Another fav. is papa wemba & Brenda Fassie (Africa sunshine)

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raula   

OZ walahi nimechecki hiyo video ya churchill wakati huu utaiamini lol pole.

 

Ati methali za kiswahili on mat's za mombasa..."meno mmoja, mswaki wa nini" "mdomo mkubwa, chapati waikunjiani.." looooool

 

OZ vile umerudi mtaani Nairobi...bado mlikuwa na kile TV ya Sanyo..lol

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raula   

zinginepo hapa: mburudike basi...

 

demu wako ni mshot, yee uji support kwa pavement jo

Mbuyu wako huhepa job kwenda kuswing na gate

budako fala hadi alipoingia k-bu aliambia konda amshikie chuma ndio atoe pesa.

Nyinyi wadosi mna screen kubwa mpaka Tom & Jerry wakikimbishana wanapumzikia katikati juu ya kuchoka.

ati wewe ni bow-legged na manzi wako knock-kneed, hadi mkisimama pamoja, mnaspell OX!

ati spectacles zako ni thick mpaka ukiangalia atlas, una ona watu waki wave!

 

 

basi..since mie mtu wa ushago....this is my kinda "Wewe mshamba mara yako ya kwanza kununua ballgum ulisema hutaki ya green ati haijaiva"....loool

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raula   

^^^^lol ati haijaiva...

zinginezo hapa basi...via mchongoano.com

 

Ati Unakipara ukivaa polo neck unakaa roll on

 

Ati wewe ni mzee hadi ukizaliwa "OLD TESTAMENT" ilikuwa inaitwa "TESTAMENT"

 

Umezoea kutumia wasee please call me mpaka ukipress *130* simu ukutolea phone book ujichagulie.

 

We ni dentist mpro hadi unang'oa blue tooth ya phone yako.

 

Ati wewe mweusi tu sana mpaka hauna bright ideas.

 

Ati mtoi wenu alizaliwa akiwa mblack mpaka doki akasema, " Kameungua".

 

We ni mkonda hadi uki dance helicopter una take off...

 

UKo na macho kubwa hadi wewe huitwa eye witness

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raula   

We unanuka, mpaka ukipita karibu na choo inajiflash

 

We unanuka, mpaka ukipita karibu na choo inajiflash

 

manzi yako ni mnono hadi badala ya G string ye hutumia G chain

We ni mweusi mpaka mbu akitaka kukuuma anakuja na torch!!

maze hauskii wee ni fala leo nilikuget umeweka bread kwa barabara,kukuuliza nini mbaya unanishow "ati maze nagojea jam"

 

Kuku yenu noma, after imepandwa na jogoo, ye huimba, "knocked me down"

 

via:http://www.kichizi.com/mchongoano/popular/page5/#p

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raula   

more mchongoano's...

 

 

wewe ni mshamba wa kung'oa hadi saa za kulala badala ung'orote unafanaya ngolololololo!!!

 

ati kwenyu mumesota hadi hadi mnakulanga sembe na picha ya kuku..

 

 

Ati wewe ni mjinga hadi uliomba charger ulipoenda kusajiliwa - "iko wapi charger ya hii electronic voting card ama inatumia solar"

 

 

http://www.kichizi.com/mchongoano/popular/page4/#p

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raula   

Reer Garissa+reer xamar =reer Bari...(all combined in this video)..

 

 

 

kila mtu ni Koorneel (colonel) bwana...mogadishu is very Jam....

 

Reer bari wuxuu yiri....idaacada reer kuuriya ii shid..looooool

reer xamar .............idaacado india ii shid..looool

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Oz   

How to spot kenyan

 

1. Goes to a restaurant and orders 'nipee/leta kama ya uleee'

 

2. They are always dissing other cars, especially ka Vitz but does not even own a bicycle.

 

3. Every strike has to have the song "Mapambano mapambano", and the "Haki yetu" slogan.

 

4. They say 207 when they mean 2007

 

5. They point at stuff with their lips...sijasema Mwende!

 

6. laughs at a ProBox owner from inside a Tuk Tuk.

 

7. Reads your newspaper with you in the Matatu and gets angry when you flip over the page.

 

8. Goes to study in India, returns with an American accent...yu kna wha am sayin?

 

9. You invite them home for a birthday party and they come empty-handed and hungry.

 

10. Borrows your pen and never returns, and if they do return, kifuniko imetafunwa!.

 

11. Refers to all brands of detergent as Omo.

 

12. Refers to a Toyota Hiace as a Nissan.

 

13. When rela's come visiting and they expect you give them fare back home.

 

14. When surprised their first word is "Ngai!"

 

15. Introduces himself/herself by saying "My names are"

 

16. Puts Avocado in all types of food even crisps SMH.

 

17. They fear meeting a police at night than a robber!

 

18. Buys mineral water once and re-uses the bottle with tap water for 2 months.

 

19. When driving ataweka mkono ya left juu ya gear, na gari ni Automatic.

 

20. Create 6-8 lanes on a two lane road...and COMPLAINS of Traffic!

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raula   

^^^lol.

 

Here is a funny text/SMS.."Kuna jamaa alikuwa amekula miraa mpaka akawa fullhandas akicheki nje aona mvua yanyesha akasema doh mke wangu atakuwa na wasi wasi kama sikuenda hapo hapo akachukuwa mwavuli akaenda kwa mke wake akamwambia mke wangu mvua yanyesha sana siezi kuja nyumbani nitakuja kesho"

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