Sign in to follow this  
NinBrown

Husban Wife

Recommended Posts

NinBrown   

HERE R FEW JOKES THAT FOUND THEIR WAY INTO MY MAIL BOX...........ENJOY

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. The next week, the man realized that

he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (AND LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM."

The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

The paper READ, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>

 

A scuba diver is paddling around about 20 feet below sea level when he notices another man at the same depth, but with no scuba gear on.

The diver goes below another 20 feet, and the man joins him a moment ater. The diver goes down even farther and the same fellow is right behind him. The confused diver takes out his waterproof chalkboard and writes, "How the heck are you able to stay under this deep without equipment?"

The man grabs the board and chalk, erases what the diver had written, and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron."

<><><><><><>

Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and discussing their work.

 

"I think accountants are the easiest to operate on," said the first surgeon. "You open them up and everything inside is numbered."

 

"I think librarians are the easiest to operate on," said the second.

"You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."

"I like to operate on electricians," said the third. "You open them up and everything inside is color-coded."

"I like to operate on lawyers," said the fourth. "They're heartless,

spineless, gutless, and their heads and their asses are interchangeable."

 

"I like engineers," said the fifth. "They always understand when you

have a few parts left over at the end."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

loooooooooool that's funny, i really liked the second one with the scuba diver hehehehehehehe :D I meant to reply a while back but it's just got busy...bee bye

 

P.s. nivia i read all the jokes u did post and if you go back right now to your recent jokes, u wouldnt find these ones there...So please check your facts before saying to someone "they lack orginality" :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Scorpio or what ever your name is....u need to check ur facts cuz if u go back u can see that I clearly posted "Silent treatment" awhile back...so before u open ur mouth and get involved in something u clearly know nothing about check ur facts twice and than a third time and if u still got time go back and check it a fourth time...aight peace the f*** out

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hmmm since i know you can respond to a topic, i would go out on a limb here and assume that you can read as well...First of all, you can see what my name is because IT'S RIGHT THERE duh....And second of all, i said i read all your recent jokes and these ones aren't in ur recent posts, means that this guy had posted 3 jokes and you didn't post two of them...I don't need to speak to you like a child and spell everyword out and say "oh yeah i read 'silent treament topic' you posted but the other two jokes u never posted" :rolleyes: :rolleyes: And lastely, your first statement,"i could have sworn i posted the same thing couple of days ago" clearly implies, in my opionion, you were claiming you had posted all those same jokes not long ago. Maybe u needed to make the distintion to yourself rather than to me.... smile.gifsmile.gif

 

And as final thought, non of us here has a claim to jokes because all we do is "copy and paste" therefore there is really no "orginality issues" here or "claim rights" So as an advice, which i am sure will not be heed, I would say relax, take a deep breath and enjoy the jokes...YOU WOULD LIVE LONGER...Bee bye

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Scopion_sista...well I guess what they say is true..your bark is really worse than your bite...so instead of barking at me my suggestion would be to stop paying such close attention to my posts and really focus on your spelling...I mean come on if ur gonna use such words in your vocab atleast take the time to spell check them...I'm sure it doesn't take that much time to look them up in the dictionary...and as for what I said about orginality and claiming the joke as mine..I guess it got the better of me...I guess it's true what you said I shouldn't claim any joke as mine and should just sit back and relax...therefore I will take your suggestion in to concideration and except my mistake as a mature adult...If I implied that I posted all three well I apologize...what I meant to say was the first one...and for you...giving me the advice of relaxing and taking a deep breath hence I would live longer...well I advise you to practice what you preach...I mean you really took what I said to heart...It's only an assumption on my part...for you to actually take the time to respond to my post when it was really none of your concern...I'm flattered...that's all I have to say for now...so I leave you with these words you clearly love to use " BEE BYE" :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
MD   

looooooooooooool :D:D:D

 

Now Now girls S_S and Nivea Nova nothing to argue about We want Peace :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this