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OdaySomali

Working Studying in Gaalo Societies

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Wadani   

OdaySomali;990167 wrote:
Bump! X-mas is around the corner. And once again there will be the question of X-mas parties.

 

This time I am attending a X-mas party. I suppose people change in their attitudes.

looool, what made u change your attitude?

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odaysomali;990167 wrote:
bump! X-mas is around the corner. And once again there will be the question of x-mas parties.

 

This time i am attending a x-mas party. I suppose people change in their attitudes.

 

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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Safferz   

OdaySomali;990167 wrote:
Bump! X-mas is around the corner. And once again there will be the question of X-mas parties.

 

This time I am attending a X-mas party. I suppose people change in their attitudes.

It's always good to make an appearance, just long enough for the free food and saying hello, then make an early exit. I do this not because I have an issue with holiday functions, but because I hate people.

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OdaySomali;990167 wrote:
Bump! X-mas is around the corner. And once again there will be the question of X-mas parties.

 

This time I am attending a X-mas party. I suppose people change in their attitudes.

Stay grounded on your principal oday, don't give into the man!

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Yaasir   

Gaalo are gaalo, what's their say other than the causal greetings which are few and far between, However the ladies on the other hand. :D

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Yaasir;990183 wrote:
Gaalo are gaalo, what's their say other than the causal greetings which are few and far between, However the ladies on the other hand.
:D

1. Welcome to SOL

2. WTF are you saying?

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Yaasir;990205 wrote:
^

1. Thx

2. I'm simply saying the future is not now, we're in the present.

 

Before you can finish saying 'present,' you're in the future. Therefore, the present is always past and thefuture[is]now. Embrace.

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Khayr   

OdaySomali,

 

It is always a tough decision to make because of the implied repreccusions. Meaning that if you don't attend, you will be deemed to be too conservative and lacking in interpersonal skills.

 

Question: If you were invited to a

co-workers gaalo like wedding (alcohol following like water), would you go or politely refuse?

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I understand how you feel. Sometimes when my gaalo coworkers speak to me, my mind dozes off and it's hard to really form a connection with them. They bore me to death, and don't have the slightest interest in what they have to say. Especially on a Monday morning, when they talk about the parties they were at the previous weekend, how much they drank, girlfriend/boyfriend problems, talking about their cottage up in the woods, talking about the next Led Zepellin concert they want to attend, and a bunch of other topics.

 

But you really have to deal with this, they are your coworkers, whether you like it or not. You should master the art of feigning interest in convos, that's what I did. When they talk about rock music or some other useless topic, make sure you mind doesn't doze off, and if they invite you to their get-togethers, it's best to show up. Whenever they invite me, I accept the invitation, I show up to the get-together, and then I leave within 30 minutes.

 

All in all, the whole awkwardness and dullness in dealing with gaalo coworkers can be overcome with hard-work and paying attention. No matter how much they bore you, remember that dealing with them is necessary

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DoctorKenney;990295 wrote:
I understand how you feel. Sometimes when my gaalo coworkers speak to me, my mind dozes off and it's hard to really form a connection with them. They bore me to death, and don't have the slightest interest in what they have to say. Especially on a Monday morning, when they talk about the parties they were at the previous weekend, how much they drank, girlfriend/boyfriend problems, talking about their cottage up in the woods, talking about the next Led Zepellin concert they want to attend, and a bunch of other topics.

 

But you really have to deal with this, they are your coworkers, whether you like it or not. You should master the art of feigning interest in convos, that's what I did. When they talk about rock music or some other useless topic, make sure you mind doesn't doze off, and if they invite you to their get-togethers, it's best to show up. Whenever they invite me, I accept the invitation, I show up to the get-together, and then I leave within 30 minutes.

 

All in all, the whole awkwardness and dullness in dealing with gaalo coworkers can be overcome with hard-work and paying attention. No matter how much they bore you, remember that dealing with them is necessary

I don't think you need to show up. If you explain clearly why you're not showing up. Another poster said invite them to lunch one day and show them that they're not the problem and that it's the setting and the environment. Just look at the way they deal with Mormons, they know that most of them don't drink and stay celibate and they respect that. There's a baseball player who's Mormon and was yet to turn 21 in the states and came up to Canada for a game, a reporter asked him if he was taking advantage of the drinking age being 19 in Canada. This reporter was ridiculed for being insensitive towards the player's faith and was there was the famous quote of "that's a clown question bro". My point is if these people like the Mormons and Amish are respected and given their faith and ideology, then who are we as great nation of Mohamed (Salahu calihi wa salam) to say that we don't need to offend people and that we should show up to their celebrations. Having lived with these people for over 20 years one thing they appreciate is being real and honest, so be real and honest and up front about your faith there's nothing awkward about it. Just like the fellow that use to always say "say one for me" referring to me going to Jumca prayer.

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You're right bro. In my workplace, I generally behave aloof and distant, and only engage in conversation when they approach me. But since my job requires a lot of interaction with coworkers, I tend to accept their invitations solely for the sake of maintaining good relations with my coworkers. I show up, say hi to a few people, and then I leave suddenly. Sometimes I bring one of my Somali friends just so he can keep me sane during the entire ordeal ;)

 

But I'll try your method and see how it works inshaAllah

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Khayr   

Shouldn't the way you look as a representative of an opposing worldview (Islam) be enough of a deterent for co-workers to invite you to their get togethers. The Beard and Hijab are clear outward signs for muslims and are distinguishing features.

 

As you grow towards Allah, so to the distance between you and them grows.

 

Be friendly but don't be of them.

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DoctorKenney;990303 wrote:
You're right bro. In my workplace, I generally behave aloof and distant, and only engage in conversation when they approach me. But since my job requires a lot of interaction with coworkers, I tend to accept their invitations solely for the sake of maintaining good relations with my coworkers. I show up, say hi to a few people, and then I leave suddenly. Sometimes I bring one of my Somali friends just so he can keep me sane during the entire ordeal
;)

 

But I'll try your method and see how it works inshaAllah

Sorry Dr. K I didn't want to make it sound that you were in the wrong. It's definitely easier said than done and you're more cautious than most people I know. I remember a Pakistani brother telling me about the whole handshaking ordeal and he said that he simply mentions it in the email after the confirmation of the interview that he doesn't shake hands. It's just like when someone with a germ phobia refuses to shake hands it shouldn't be anymore awkward for a Muslim to do it. We all have our difficulties and vices living in these societies, may Allah make it easy for all of us Allahuma Ameen...

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