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Ms DD

Finding a spouse Islamically

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Ms DD   

Salaam aleykum

 

There are more and more sisters who want to get married but dont know where to start. I personally have 3 friends over the age of 25 who are finding it hard to meet a pious somali men. Non-practising somalis are two a penny!

 

Somalis in Diaspora find it very hard to meet someone. We need Islamic avenues in finding a partner in the Somali Community.

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Nur   

Canbarro walaal

 

May Allah bless you for your caring approach to the Marriage dilemma for our Sisters.

 

The problem is compounded by the new lifestyles and ideologies Nomads have adopted in their new host countries in addition to the widening intellectual gap between Somali men and Somali women living abroad.

 

Apart from ploygamy, which is not acceptable to the majority of Somali women abroad, finding a mate of comparable intellectual/Islamic stature in the eyes of the Somali women may be only available through new male converts, and they are not many, I have few of my own relatives either engaged or married to them, happily.

 

Nur

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Ms DD   

Nur

 

I really thought about setting marriage service for Somalis but the idea was shot down by my family. I was told that i dont want to become 'rufiyaan nimanka and naagaha isku geysa'. I just couldnt believe it. I also tested the idea with single Somalis and they told me that any member of this service will come across as desperate.

 

It is a shame really.

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Nehanda   

The only solution since outright blind date is a taboo in our culture is to pray to Allah to bless me with a devout Somali brother whose character compliments mine.

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Tbere are many ways of finding a suitable hussie , one just needs to explore their options and do it their own way ... a way that they feel comfy with.

 

Pateince is a must in such circs and must place your trust in Allah.

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Mosques are setting up programs for that, I would definately check there. Especially the Halaqas or circle of knowledge...you would find few pious people there with the right mind and heart.

 

other than that, dua is the best way i guess.

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S.O.S   

Unfortunately, our sisters always fail to utilise their full rights completely. On the aspect of finding the right man, it's the responsibility of the family and relatives of the sister, and to be precise, it's the sole responsibility of her mahrems to find her a suitable husband. All she has to do is ask, make her conditions known and be mentally prepared for it. Very simple! smile.gif

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i just need to understand, y cant we be happy being single :confused: ... and if the answer is; we have needs.. than use some ice and quit watching romantic movies :D

 

seriously, being single seems to be the best way to go vs getting married in this time and age!

yes, im not brave enough to get divorced, since thats the fashion in somaliwood

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Originally posted by Tenaciousgirl:

i just need to understand, y cant we be happy being single :confused: ... and if the answer is; we have needs.. than use some ice and quit watching romantic movies
:D

 

seriously, being single seems to be the best way to go vs getting married in this time and age!

yes, im not brave enough to get divorced, since thats the fashion in somaliwood

I have "issues" with people who speak for 20

million Somalis around the world

 

Infact the boys nowadays are of "good breed"..I think this has to do with some deen, access to Education..I thought

 

and ruffian :D as in 'rufiyaan nimanka and naagaha isku geysa'...keep up..You are doing a great work..This is digital age

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seriously! cambarro u aint looking for true somali dude! why front!.....

 

lately, every 1 has become a counterfeit muslim wannabe! some of us has mastered of art of phony muslimlism that we cant even utter one word straight! every sentence is ended with some sort of euphemism! i understand how we got to that level.. me being an x resident among the aa- rabs

do really understand it! but... hey as they say what goes around comes around..!

 

that said! i still have my culture n my religion to! one thing that i always puts my in my chair, is my culture n imaan in my religion!

 

so as somali, u shouldnt have no problems looking into your society finding your mate! as your parent did! if u do have a problem with that! than u have changed...... & need to look else where simple as that!! it aint no big husle!!

 

always a somali once you love your culture! how come every xalimo who utters these words has an undercover agenda to marry a loser foreigner!! come yall, this is really getting old! u gonna tell us that no faraax has showed interested in yah!! and u kick him to curb like an alley curi!!dont lie sista!!

 

say it aint so cambarro!!! :confused:

 

peace!!

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Khalaf   

^^^^Right on man! Do not marry foreigners sisters….forget the male converts marry your own kind if u know whats good for u! There are good somali brothers don’t front walaalhi.

 

Why is it only our women and not other women like the arab women, Indian/Pakistani women almost never consider outside their race!

 

Yet u got sistas going for every race: only in my immediate family u got: some marriered to Iranians, Arabs, Blacks, Paki/Indian, Malaysian, and the white converts. Some don’t even know the English language well!

 

What do the kids look like…I don’t c any Somali blood they look arab or mexican! How about our dhaqan and language…will be lost!!! U think these kids will remember their relatives back home in Somalia starving….or remember their linage….heck no!

 

In Germany this summer I met a white brother from Denmark guess what had already divorced two sistas, and on his third wife!!!!!!! Some of our women are cheap walaalhi….even my religious moms was like why would she marry an outsider who alreadly divorced two somaali woman-something gotta be wrong with the dude.

 

Anyway…I hate the idea of seeing a sista with an outsider but this is tiny minority not our aslii women! What was that ice age quote: mammalians should be with mammalians….somali women should be with Somali men! Word!

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Originally posted by Cambarro:

Salaam aleykum

 

There are more and more sisters who want to get married but dont know where to start. I personally have 3 friends over the age of 25 who are finding it hard to meet a pious somali men. Non-practising somalis are two a penny!

 

Somalis in Diaspora find it very hard to meet someone. We need Islamic avenues in finding a partner in the Somali Community.

 

Canbarrow,

 

The women can change that Non-practising for better, if she is poius and ehelu taqwa, "waar bal tuku markay tidha goor walba Allah wax xun ku saarye!, safka hore waa ku jira :D cos you cannt leave him in the mafrish to rot.

 

you have heard that "every great man there is woman behind him" - so true, Women are not in the background anymore they are at the forefront at the battle of sexes. when men slip out of way, or stumble, they should help them to regain posture.

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