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7_steps_2_Heaven

I'm shocked by what our somali men do!!!

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bee lemme interject a true story! once upon time, me good ole rudy, was persuing this xalimo... know u and I know that xalimos roam this earth in packs! so everything was cushy cushy! all of sudden! bam! i was hit w/this attitude afka la boorayo!

i said, home-gal u wanna go, go dont tell me stuff u heard from your gal-friend that dizz you and your qabiil! and thats exactly what happen!! she hit the road, moved to mn...a month later call back..hey i wanna come back! and i just simply does told her...sorry stay where u r! she got married, now divorced and still planning to move back to la...na'mean. she had job, a car and an apt...not to forget moi!!hello.. she dropped everything, just cuz her friend was moving to mn..

now from what i understand, they dont even talk no more!!! gimme a break~~~ now who tripping.... :(

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Abdinuur   

a lot of big words in this topic!

 

Anyways, whatever people do is their own freakin business...and we shouldnt be worrying about it.

 

Worry about yours when the time comes, Kabiish!

 

Besides, this is very ethical thing to do if a man wants to pursue his life this way.

 

Flyin_Still's comment about the tile is helirious...you should go back and re-read it!

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Zakariye   

S/ALAYKUM

 

AR GABADHAN CARMEL, CALOOL XANUUN HANAGU RIDIN, ADIGA WAXAAD U EKTAHAY QOF WAX GARAD AH, HADANA ILLAH WAXUU KUUGU DIRAY NIMANKAYNA, WAXAAN KU WEYDIIN, HIBO NUUR WALAASHAA MIYAA,LOL. JUST KIDDING ANYWAY I HAVE TO GIVE IT 2 YOU, YES IF YOU EVER GET MARRIED AND YOUR OTHER SIGNIFICANT MARRIES ANOTHER LADIES, UPTO 3 MORE BTFL LADIES, YES STAY THE COURSE CZ YOU HAVE NO WAY OUT, THE MAN KNOWS ALL ABOUT YOU, AND HE IS GOING TO TELL EVERY OTHER MATE YOU ARE GOING TO PURSUE,LOL. SO HUSH AND LOVE US.

 

C/SALAM

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Macalin   

Twweeety,Am not gonna sit here and applaud you for BEING such an understanding and perfectly mature WOMAN,sorry cant do it its just my lakkadness wouldnt let me do it...however ama say this: Are you looking at one Farax who is unhappily married that you justifying this??? :D ...Man o Man!.....

 

Ah well good say u had there..

 

Miss Flying:I like the anology..Tiles hope they smooth tiles otherwise them highHeels make u trip :D

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Qac Qaac   

Ameenah what is your answer based on sis, my answer was based on a fact. and historical stats, and also from our religion.

 

barwaaqo when u say, for some of us it never gets old, do u really think, u so educated when u take the ideas from the west, and reject your husbands rights. it is no pt of talking from this pt anymore, coz it looks like u guys, are not seeing with your eyes.

 

so remember u guys are educated, smart and beautiful, who grew up in western countries, u guys should now all, should even know more than the girls in somalia, coz u guys in western countries, could use computers, and cell phones, and drive cars, IS THAT, why u guys think, u guys are better?

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Adna   

salaam to ya'alll

 

 

let me add a bit from what i belive of this whole thing. first we all agreed that it's some thing that allah uu baneenay. second u guys know that women are twice as men in th whole world, so it's xikamad uu alle ugu talagalay,so no women should left behind. froxample as a family i'm form we are only 6 and some times i wish if we coud be more, like i have 9 uncles, and 7 aunts from my dad's side... as westernized women i think somali women are going way out of hand i can't really list them here but it really drives me nuts we should stick to our religion and culture. back home if women uu nikeeda guursado wey maseeree then he will do what ever then she will say gurigeed sax hada no no noo,,,, alaah noo naxariisto.....

 

p.s from what i belive if i get marreid and my husband wants an other one i will accept for the sake of my kids i will never be a single mom unless he dies,,from what i have seen things in here i don't even wish to have kids in this crazyyy world.... i will stop right here before i say more thingss,,,, love you alll

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Abdinuur   

People,

 

Take it from Asraa...real true message. Thanx boo.

 

And personally, I will want to commit to one woman grow old with her til death due as part!

 

BUT, there's still the religion aspect that you guys are abondoning and forgetting about. Come back to reality...

 

You see...no one dies from from lack of sex, it is lack of love that we die from.

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Haneefah   

Originally posted by Kaafi:

BUT, there's still the religion aspect that you guys are abondoning and forgetting about. Come back to reality...

Oh pahlease!! The deen has been so misused by many Muslim men when it comes to this topic. It irritates me when men who have the slightest clue about the Qur'an and the Sunnah pick and choose things and use it to their advantage.

 

Northener, walal, it will never end until our men begin to make some serious life-style and behavioural changes! smile.gif

 

I'd agree with Ameenah on this...many women in the west put themselves in this predicament. For instance, I have seen here many women who send their husbands to the States hoping to increase their family income..."walalo orodoo inoo soo shaqee lacag aan save gareeysano"....yeah right!...wuxu waa nin, he can only practice self-control for so long. Also, you have to remember, only the smart Allah-fearing ones will get married but the rest might commit a sin they would not have normally committed had their wives not forced them out of their perfectly halal homes. Who's responsible for that sin, obviously the wife, and she sure will be punished for it. So the solution is simple , as some mentioned, women need to be with their husbands everywhere, to save themselves and their husbands from going astray, or in this case from getting married to another woman.

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Liqaye   

True story:

 

DURING THE FIRST MEETING BETWEEN SHAKA ZULU AND BRITISH EXPLORERS, WHO HAD COME TO KWA-ZULU NATAL IN SEARCH OF THE FABLED BLACK KING MARRIAGE WAS DISCUSSED.

 

Shaka zulu: How many wives does UM-JOJI (king george) Have

 

Peterson Head of expedition: Well your highness he has only one wife.

 

Shaka Zulu: Ah Um-Joji is indeed a wise man, but he could have been wiser and done like me and married no woman!

:D my attempt at humor.

 

Ladies and gentlemen the issue here is not religion, or westernization, or innate short comings in men or women although these are all used to cover the truth up .

It is something more fundamental in all somalis were ever they are, No somali male or female is ever RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT THEY DO.

you can see it in the little things, for instance you have a very important meeting with a somali lady or man, you have been waiting for 40 minutes just when you are ready to leave in SHE/HE walks in, and instaed of apologizing it is always some one elses fault, dhofaar hebel hebel ba meesha ba darika iga helay ...and so on and so on.

 

The same with the men, a woman is always a ********* when we have managed after trying very hard to bed her, and not only thatsome of us have the temerity to proclaim it from the rafters and turn a womans who had a moment of weakness in to that very thing.

All men should recognize the responsibility of raising a family in islam and iman, is one of the most if not the most important thing in the world and on the day of judgement.

Having this much responsibility with one family, I wonder who in his right mind and who fears the day of reckoning would marry another woman when he is struggling with his first FAMILY, whos girl children he cannot protect and whos sons he does not have the time to lead on a path of virtue.

 

But somali men, and I say this in GENERAL comparision are the most indulgent, and respectfull of their women.

Wallahi it makes me pee my pants when I hear some of our sisters saying that somali men are good for nothing " afganis and pakistanis are were you get the real men" ok you do that get a Bargofz or a Khan as you baby daddy but dont you dare come back to the somali community with that little foreigner and talk about qabil or somalinimo.

Not even when you are treated as a second class citizen in HIS country and among His extended family.

 

Any wayz I am not defending any one but we got to wake up to our responsibility's instead of bad mouthing each other, and being so damn cynical of each other.

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Originally posted by Qac Qaac:

no sister, if the husband wants to marry another wife, he doesn't have to ask his wife, that is what our religion telling us. coz think about it, all u girls here if u guys were the first wifes u will all say no to the 2nd wife. so why should man ask u guys, when he already knows your answer it will be NO. THAT IS WHY ISLAM SAYS IT DOESN'T MATTER TO ASK YOUR FIRST WIFE'S PERMISSION.

A likely story qac qaac. You do know there are many stipulations to marrying a second wife that majority ...I mean a huge majority of men can not fullfill. Do not twist the language of the religion because we all know that the first wife has to AGREE...otherwise, give her a divorce. In this country..it is next to impossible to marry 2 wives for economic reasons (unless of course you are a millionare)...

 

peace

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Xafsa   

Ameenah well said hon...Its all about where you stand and how strongly you feel about your hubby going and getting another female. I've seen some women make a big deal out of it the first few weeks, then she asks for set dahab ah then all is good!! What the hell is that? As if a piece of medal hangin from my neck and ears is gonna make me feel better about having to share my husband!

 

Lets face the facts though ladies...the majority of us females are nagging b!tches( no offence intended, i'm included in this) and this makes it easier for them to do wrong by us. My theory is nin waxaad rabtid waa ka keensan kartaa....you can make him do what you want. Just play your cards right.

 

 

Flying

Why walk all over them when you can walk beside them hand in hand??

Thats the goal Gediid but you men waa kirif kirif badan tihiin axsaanka aaba idinkaga sii daro! ;)

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Qac Qaac   

opinionated, u said we all know the man should ask his first wife if he wants to get married to a 2nd one. ok. now show me that from the quran or the hadiths of the prophet scw. pls don't just say things because u wished it was like this.

 

again sisters, i said this before ama say it again. it is easy to fellow islam, when it agrees with u. but really hard when it is against you. true believer says the trueth, even if it is against him/her.

 

flying still, what u mean, when u say i would never share my husband, your allah, allowed to share your husband if he wants another wife. no one is above the law of islam, we should all know this atleast.

 

asraa masha'allah, if all the sister in here tought the way u think, no man will ever even consider to marry another wife with u. coz u actually ready, and believe what allah said no matter what, even if it against you, your family, your qabiil. masha'allah

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Blessed   

Originally posted by Northerner:

the majority of us females are nagging b!tches

 

loooool

no comment

looooooooool.. Don't even think about it love. Yeah you know what I mean.

 

Solution? For the love of God, DON'T ALLOW YOUR HUSBANDS TO GO BACK TO SOMALIA ALONE!! Either accompany him or accompany him.

Absolutely.

 

Naah, for some it will never get old. How can it, when it is the apparent cause of every single social problem/issue within the community? I bet you if they could blame the current political mess in Somalia on "Westernised Somali women", they would in a heartbeat.

Lol babes. It's all good though, I actually enjoy watching them getting all hot and bothered over nothing :Dicon_razz.gif

 

QacQaac

 

Ameenah what is your answer based on sis, my answer was based on a fact. and historical stats, and also from our religion.

From what I've see happening around me walaal. It is a fact that most Somalis living the west live on welfare, it is a fact that fathers are alleviated from their financial responsibility.

 

And Islamicaly, isn't it a must that the men provide for both wives financially? And that he treats them equally?

 

I didn't say the polygamy was forbidden in Islam and I didn't question its practice. What I did is question the validity of your lame a Somali remarries because Somali have become westernised line. I mean if you just said that he can because Allah gave him the right.. that’s fine.

 

In honestly walaal, if a man is incapable of taking care of number one, how the hell is he going to handle the troublesome wife and another one? What makes you guys think that women in Somalia are prepared to put up with your lazy ways? Because, as it goes when you fail to send her passport and regular money – she won’t want you no more!

 

 

When u say, for some of us it never gets old, do u really think, u so educated when u take the ideas from the west, and reject your husbands rights. it is no pt of talking from this pt anymore, coz it looks like u guys, are not seeing with your eyes.

Waah, waah. Musiibo ayaa nahaysata. I think some1 is having problems with assertive women. I don't even recall Barwaqo saying that polygamy was wrong? Neither had we touched on the rights of the husband.

 

Lakkad

lol. I'm looking for no unhappy farax and I'm not justifying anything. I was just pointing out to the sisters that; if it wasn't for the willingness on the part of some women, the men would think twice before marrying another. I have my preferences and I'll make sure that I see to getting my way ... but if another woman is happy to share her husband, than who am I to complain?

 

 

Flying still-

The *****dome is our own enemy.. but at least we know it....you catch more flies with honey and if we treat them well, they'll treat us as we want to be treated smile.gif

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Paragon   

Men are like tiles you lay 'em down right the first time you can walk all over them.

Or was it the other way around, Flying-still?

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