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Ardo Askari

She is not that into him anymore!

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Asc all, thank you for your input and advices its much appreciated.I really wished i wasnt caught up inbetween i dont want to be giving advices if i am not in her shoes.Some of you think this is all about gifts but i think for some1 who is as wise as her wouldnt jump to conclusion and demand for a divorce if it was just abt that.

C&H-i think you are right from what i knw of its the fact that she feels her husband is not romantic thus contributing to the lack of emotional connection they share.

 

Buuxo-I agree with u 100%, majority of somalis dont knw how to express their love towards their spouses.Its their 5yr anniversary tomorrow so i encouraged her to be a devouted wife and please her husband..Marka waan arki doonaa bal in uu xasuusto any gifts or acknowledgement of the day...You cant tell me that this is a huge milestone and they shouldnt be celebrating it?

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Originally posted by Ardo Askari:

Asc all, thank you for your input and advices its much appreciated.I really wished i wasnt caught up inbetween i dont want to be giving advices if i am not in her shoes.Some of you think this is all about gifts but i think for some1 who is as wise as her wouldnt jump to conclusion and demand for a divorce if it was just abt that.

C&H-i think you are right from what i knw of its the fact that she feels her husband is not romantic thus contributing to the lack of emotional connection they share.

 

Buuxo-I agree with u 100%, majority of somalis dont knw how to express their love towards their spouses.Its their 5yr anniversary tomorrow so i encouraged her to be a devouted wife and please her husband..Marka waan arki doonaa bal in uu xasuusto any gifts or acknowledgement of the day...You cant tell me that this is a huge milestone and they shouldnt be celebrating it?

A little couple's therapy could help out,ya know?

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Ardo walaal not everyone attaches the same Value to anniversary the way you or your freind does it is just a random date that you got married nothing special about it at all , infact making a ritual out of it and Celebrating it every year can lead to danbi it is just as insignificant as birthdays etc.

 

Gift giving doesn't have to be tied to a specific date .. We have become the steriotypical westerners ... Where the husband gets into hot water over forgetting a meaningless date .. it sounds like it is right out of the soap operas

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MZanzi   

Many women who receive gifts all of the time have nothing but the gifts.sxbtaa sariirta hadi xaga rugby tackle ka meel lagu saaray maxeey kalo rabtaa taas ayaba gift kafiican

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Blessed   

She can try treating him how she wants to be treated. Why does the man have to be the one to be / initiate romantic gestures? If that's her only complaint then she's just being boring and uncreative.

 

Personally though, I think there are deeper issues - well there must be if she's considering divorce... and your mate needs to be honest with herself - isla hadal ku dheh and her man.

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Its their 5yr anniversary tomorrow

Oh my, see perceptions about certain dates and their meanings land people in hot water. What if he doesnt attach any value to anniversary? And she obviously does.

I once had a friend who ended a promisin relationship with a guy because of this exact reason(but they werent married). He was so good to her otherwise. He couldnt remember anniversaries, couldnt take off work for birthdays and other special days, wouldnt buy her flowers or gifts unless she screamed at him to get it but would get up 5 in the morning to take her car to the garage or pick her up from the airport or pay her bills when she was behind :confused: . For the life of me, I couldnt make her see that!! She is now realizing that she's missed on a good guy because no one came close to him as far as being considerate and caring goes.

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Choco,i am sure she was using that as an excuse. Most ppl choose silly stuff because they cant find anything better.

 

A pal of mine once said,i am breaking up with her coz she is too smart.

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^LOL@she is too smart. What a silly pal he was abti lol!

 

Ardo, it doesn't addup....she's an intelligent women and she is destryoing her family because of such silly things like flowers and aniversaries. If I were his friend, I w'd have advised him to give her what she is asking for because I don't thing she deserves him

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Originally posted by Abdiladiif:

^LOL@she is too smart. What a silly pal he was abti lol!

 

Ardo, it doesn't addup....she's an intelligent women and she is destryoing her family because of such silly things like flowers and aniversaries. If I were his friend, I w'd have advised him to give her what she is asking for because I don't thing she deserves him

The quote was, "aad bey iga aqli badanatahay"

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Kool_Kat   

I always say 'men are like dogs, it is up to you how you train them'...Malaha markii horeey leash dheer siisay odayga... :D

 

The first thing I tell women with romance issues in their marriage is that romance goes out of the window the day you marry him (maaladukaato dhaha hee)...Marriage is about give and take, treat your significant other as you like to be treated...Does your friend buy him gifts to show her appreciation? Does she massage lugahiisa after a long day's work? Does she tell him she loves him? Or invite him out for a dinner, just the two of them?

 

Marriages change after a baby comes into the picture...Life is no longer about the two, now a whole new life depends on the two, so of course every department of the marriage waxbaa iska badalaya...That's why I am a true believer of taking time together, alone and not rush to have babies right after marriage...In la'is barto maxumo, and trust, once you marry qof, you're marrying a new person oo hada iyo kow barasho nololeed kaaga baahan...

 

You mentioned he grew up in Somalia, nothing wrong with that...Aabeyaasheeni i oo kale yaaba heli kara? Kuwa meelahaan ku koray baaba ugu daran...Those who grew up back home, still have a sense of familynimo in them...Waa kuwo caruurtooda u fikiro, gurigooda ka fikiro, raxmad ineey naagtooda caawiyaan ku jirto, etc...Marka kusoo korida Somalia doesn't have to be negative wax ah... ;)

 

A wise woman once told me 'eedo nimanka waala sasabtaa, oo raxmad baala tusaa, oo raganimdiisa laga qaado sidey iyaguna kuu koolkoolistaan oo ey lugahaaga hoostooda soo fariistaan'...

 

I guess, after nine years of marriage, a girl learns a thing or two about sida nin loola dhaqmo... :cool:

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Tuujiye   

^^^^^^^^looooooooooo l kaalay somali jirijiri jirtay aa hore waxee dhahday "qofwalba weel gooni eh aa lasiiyaa, waxee rabaana waa loogu shubaa" beentaa ma aha kula fitna cinda geel waa sheekada sida ee ku bilaabato.....

 

KK expert camal aa laakiin u hadashay waa kaa cabsaday laakiin bajaqyaashaan oo kale ma tihid qadiimi aa tahay.. maanta fiiri bajaq xagaan kaar oo fiyoore ku duuban yahay mala isiin kulahaa..SHAARUU QAAN mee qabtaa in ee guursatay jileec badanaa.... Waraa naag romance raadineeso iyo shukulaato shukulaato dhoore waaye..

 

saan maxaa waaye yaaqee bajaq kaste oo cirib madoowe waxaaba soo qoree "aniga maanta anaversity gift aan sugaayaa" loooooool waraa ramadaan kabacdi topikaan aan usoo laabto iga taga!!!!

 

Wareer Badanaa!!!

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