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blue_hefner

Man never marries a premarital sex partner

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This topic may sound odd, but I just wanna get an idea if anyone of you men would marry if you end up Dambi (sex) with your Girl friend.

To start with me, I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with...

Any idea?????

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Pujah   

To start with me, I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with...

May I ask why? Do you think you can eat your cake and have it too? Allah swt said in the Koran that zani will end up with another zani(someone please post the whole ayah). So I don’t want you to get disappointed because you will most certainly end up with another zaniyah. icon_razz.gif

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mantra   

3. The fornicator shall not marry any but a fornicatress or idolatress, and (as for) the fornicatress, none shall marry her but a fornicator or an idolater; and it is forbidden to the believers.

Surah Nur

 

 

I say good luck to those who brag about their sins as if they had accomplished something truly great..

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Taliban   

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

This topic may sound odd, but I just wanna get an idea if anyone of you men would marry if you end up Dambi (sex) with your Girl friend.

For a Muslim, it's odd to have a girlfriend.

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"For Muslim, it's odd to have a girlfriend? Says who? Any daliil (evidence)

It's like saying TV is Haram coz you can watch porn movies with it.

Girlfriend is not Dambi, but the way you use the term can be Haram or Halal. In Islam if you want to marry someone, u get to know them and see if you have something in common with. You can fondle and make it Haram that way, but you can also Not do anything. So it all depends how you use it. In Islam it's even ok to see the girl's face and hair if she's your choice to marry.

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Matra, I am not promoting Faaxisha here, but it's just a hypothetical question. Az zaani Laa yankix Illaa Zaanin or Mushrik. it's true, but don't forget Allah gave Muslims a chance to repent for their past sins as long as they meet the requirements. Therefore, anything past will not be accountable and since you clear your self out of Faaxisha, you still have a hope to look for the best person.

To Puja,

that's why I will never commit a sin (sex) with the person I love. And I seriously told her str8 up that she is gone the min she does that with me despite the fact that I know she will never think of that for herself.

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Puja, am sorry I guess I didnt answer the first part of your question, which is why I said so.

The reason is because, as you talk to the person and have a relationship with, there get to be something you look forward to it atleast. That the day you marry and she carry the name wife, she's halal to you. That you can have sex with. Dont get me wrong, I dont mean only sex is the reason we get married, but atleast it's a major one as the Prophet scw said " man yaastadhic al ba'ata, falyatazawij" qofkii awooda ha guursado to eliminate dambiga "zinada" .

So if I reach the peak, in other words, have a pure sex with her, and what forces me to marry her? I get everything I need. I am already living life, eat, sleep, the only thing that she would add is Halal sex. So it's over. Plus I will believe that she would do for anyone anyways.

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Taliban   

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

Says who? Any daliil (evidence)

Title: Having a Girlfriend: Permissible?

 

Question: What Does Islam say about having girfriends or boyfriends?

 

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

 

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

 

Dear bother in Islam, thank you very much for having confidence in us, and we implore Allah to guide you to the best and to direct you to that which pleases Him, Amen.

 

It stands to reason that having a girlfriend is not the manner of a Muslim. It is forbidden for a male Muslim to have a girlfriend, as it is forbidden for a female Muslim to have a boyfriend.

 

Tackling this point in details, Dr. Muzammil Siddiqi, former president of the Islamic Society of North America (ISNA) states:

 

Muslims should have good relations with all people, males as well as females, at school, at work, in you neighborhood etc. You should be kind and courteous to everyone. However, it is not allowed in Islam to take a non-mahram person or persons of the opposite gender as a very close friend. Such friendship often leads to haram. In the Qur’an, Allah mentioned that good men and women are those who marry, do not have fornicating relationships and do not have "paramours" or Akhdan see An-Nisaa’: 25, Al-Ma'idah: 5).

 

Akhdan are "sweethearts" or for a man a "mistress" and for a woman a "lover". The Prophet, peace and blessings be upom him, is reported to have stated that “whenever two strangers of the opposite gender are alone with each other, Satan becomes the third one between them.” (At-Tirmidhi)”

 

So it is not allowed for a Muslim boy to have a girlfriend or for a Muslim girl to have a boyfriend. Howsoever pure your intentions may be, the danger is that it will lead you to sin. Or at least you will be alone with each other and spend more time together.

 

Thus, you should be friendly with your classmates, boys and girls both; but do not take a girl as your intimate friend. Of course, homosexuality is also forbidden in Islam. So do not take a boy either as your intimate friend in the "gay sense" of the word.

 

If your friend, not girlfriend, is interested in Islam, by all means help her to become Muslim. Give her the Islamic books and ask her to attend Islamic meetings and lectures. Let her accept Islam by her own will. Do not force her or put any pressure on her to become Muslim. May Allah bless you and keep you on the right path.

 

Shedding more light on this, the eminent Muslim scholar, Sheikh Muhammad Al-Hanooti, member of the North American Fiqh Council, states:

 

A friendship wth the opposite sex is not of Islam. It used to be of the Jahiliyyah (pre-Islamic era) style of life. A friendship of the two sexes can never be safe or sex-free. I agree that in some exceptional cases, it could be innocent. But, a law is usually amended for social regulations. There is no law to be customized for a certain person or few people.

 

The Qur'an and Sunnah guidance for the sexes dealing with each other has a main major issue for which Islam has set principles and rules to govern. It is the desire and lust. The Qur'an prohibits anything that motivates one's heart in a seductive way towards the other. The Qur'an tells a woman when she speaks to a man to speak in a way that doesn't show any interest in him lest he should feel seduced to build up an unhealthy relationship. If there is a possibility in any kind of action that it could lead by some percentage into catastrophe, no one will ever take that risk. I can say what you call friendship could have some percentage of leading into haram. How would you go to that risk whereas if a doctor says to you an operation of a certain organ could lead you into death? You would say I don't want to risk my life, but I will take the pain.

 

Firstly, this is a deen but not a man's opinion. Lastly, if you take it, you certainly will be on the safe side. If you want to follow reason, reason has a lot of defects and sometimes we cannot draw the line to know who is sane and who is insane. Sometimes you cannot know which is which.

 

IslamOnline.net

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Taliban thanx for the evidence, however,what is mentioned here prohibts a permenant girlfriend "referring to those couples live together" or going no further than friendship. But you can date someone while your intention is to marry the person. I totally agree with you, that it's Haram to have relationship with someone as it's your last destination, but tell me how would Islam forces us to marry a stranger. I guess Islam is way easier than that. We just need to learn more of it. You can always change the term "girlfriend" back and forth, but talking with someone as she/he is considerably someone to marry, is another way of saying girlfriend, qofteyda, mustaqbal keyga, or whatever you call. it's always relationship btwn you and him/her.

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To start with me, I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with...

Well, it's really up to you whether you sleep with your girlfriend or not ama whether you marry her or not, but your reasoning seems morally hazy.

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"To start with me, I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with..." negro please, man like u make me lol walahi she is good for u to sleep with her but no u cant marry her, plz do tell me if more man think like u and sleep with most of the xalimos out there? do u think there will be ne left for u to deflower in ure marriage bed latter on? daah plz lisen to wht ure saying becoz its not making sense to me.

 

ps BH when ure deflowring this gals do bare if u have a sis someone else might be doing the same thing to her, and u refusing to marry that gal could be ure sis faith also.

 

 

:rolleyes: man

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Taliban   

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

however,what is mentioned here prohibts a permenant girlfriend "referring to those couples live together" or going no further than friendship.

You are in error. The fatwa prohibits permanent girlfriend, temporary girlfriend, and having girlfriend altogether.

 

But you can date someone while your intention is to marry the person.

With all due respect, dating is something only non-Muslims can practice; Muslims cannot practice it. Unless you have redefined the meaning "dating", you, I and others know what it means. It's true you can see the face of the girl you want to marry, have conversation with her in front of mahrams; but that's not dating.

 

but talking with someone as she/he is considerably someone to marry, is another way of saying girlfriend, qofteyda, mustaqbal keyga, or whatever you call.

You are in error; it's not another way of saying girlfriend, mustaqbal keyga, or whatever you call. Someone you are to marry is your future wife/husband, nothing less or more. The definition of girlfriend/boyfriend is clear; it's not someone you are going to marry.

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Ibtisam   

3. The fornicator shall not marry any but a fornicatress or idolatress, and (as for) the fornicatress, none shall marry her but a fornicator or an idolater; and it is forbidden to the believers.

 

I could not agree more. I would never marry someone who slept around, had a trail of girlfriends (not even one) or even had a cosy Friendship with a number of women :rolleyes: And I would not expect to him to settle for less when it comes to women either.

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NGONGE   

I shall not marry a woman taller than me.

I shall not marry a woman fatter than me.

I shall not marry a woman richer than me.

I shall not marry a woman that loves me more than I love her.

I shall not marry a woman that went to mixed schools.

I shall not marry a woman that went to girls’ only schools.

I shall not marry one that puts on makeup.

I shall not marry one that wears trousers.

I shall not marry one that owns a mobile phone.

I shall not marry a woman that drives.

I shall not marry a woman that does not speak her mother tongue.

I shall not marry a woman with a career.

I shall not marry a woman with no ambitions.

I shall not marry a woman with small hips.

I shall not marry a woman that uses chemical products.

I shall not marry a woman that argues back.

I shall not marry a woman that never talks.

I shall not marry a woman that doesn’t cover up.

I shall not marry an uptight woman.

I shall not marry a woman that smiles at me.

I shall not marry a woman that smiles at other men.

I shall not marry a woman that proposes to me.

I shall not..I shall not..I shall not. You hear?

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