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Chimera

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Chimera   

I initially intended to post a positive article, but I think this would be a form of denial. There are certain issues that we can't sweep under the floor. Inner turmoil being one of them. As a person with a high level of creativity in multiple mediums, active in sports as well as a sociable person, you wouldn't be able to tell if you saw me that I experience periods of depression that I can't explain, I never realised until I spoke with a sister(who is a doctor) that these were some of the classic sympthoms of a potential Bipolar disorder, and she eventually concluded that it was directly linked to the stress of following what's happening back home, which I have stopped doing since.

 

Indeed prior to 2006, these random episodes of feeling down was completely alien to me. Things like going to the cinema with your friends or having dinner with your fiancee were what I used to look forward to, yet slowly but surely they eventually felt bland, though I maintained a mask of joy. Denying this would be unfair to them especially if it evolves into something more severe than the mild situation i'm currently dealing with, which is only such because of my structured daily life, friends and family, being busy alot with my projects, being active at sports and having no history or interest in substance abuse.

 

If I lost all of that, I would be like the guys at the maaqayad whom I used to look down upon, but now understand. I know there is an ignorant stigma with regards to the things I just confessed, and i'm sure for the remainder of my stay here I will be seen as a looney, but I really don't care since I don't know anyone here and couldn't care less about the Internet other than to inform my fellow kin.

 

If you have a friend or a relative that show signs of change, it wouldn't hurt to look up these signs that are potentially sympthoms of something. Ignoring it, denying it, is another form of "abandonment".

 

A good article that touches upon some of the stuff I wrote:

 

The turmoil within: Somali families try to fit in, struggle to forget

 

In our second of a three-part series, "Civil War Kids: Young Somalis in Minnesota," reporter Laura Yuen explores the psychological scars inflicted by the bloody Somali civil war and how they are felt by the young generation in Minnesota.

 

St. Paul, Minn. — Ismail Osman had Hollywood dreams when he escaped Somalia's civil war and arrived in the United States eleven years ago. "When I came here, my goal was to be a movie star," he said. That would be a lofty goal for any young person. But it was particularly daunting for the 28-year-old Osman, whose childhood memories from Somalia could make for the most violent kind of movie.

 

Osman said he witnessed the murder of his aunt and uncle. He watched the brutal rape of a young girl. He's still haunted by what he saw in his war-torn homeland, and by what he did. Though he doesn't want to give details, he said that even at age 12 he was big enough to carry an assault rifle. "I don't like to say it, but in self-defense, I've done some horrible thing that I don't like to talk about," Osman said, his voice breaking

 

Osman is one of a number of young Somali-Americans who are struggling with mental illness. Some, like Osman, suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, others have bipolar disorder or substance abuse problems. Once homeless, Osman now lives in a south Minneapolis bungalow with other young Somali men who bear the psychological scars of war and the trauma of seeing loved ones killed or tortured.

 

"In my nightmares, I get shot in my sleep," he said. "Somebody will say, 'You remember me? Ismail, you killed me. You take my life. Now I'm here to take yours.' And I jump out of bed. I'm sweating, hot. Sometimes I get up screaming."

 

TREATMENT: GETTING BEYOND 'CRAZY'

 

Social worker David McGraw Schuchman said it's important to recognize that every refugee in the Somali-American community has been personally affected in some way by the civil war. If they weren't shot at or beaten, their relatives were. But he says many aren't getting the help they need.

 

"For many Somalis, as I understand it, they have no concept of mental illness except 'crazy,'" said Schuchman. "And when they think of crazy, it's extreme cases, like practically throwing-off-your-clothes-in-public kind of crazy. So you're either crazy, or you're sane."
Schuchman's clinic, run by the nonprofit Volunteers of America, focuses solely on East Africans. He recalled failed attempts at drum up support for mental health services at an elders meeting in the late '90s.

 

"I realized what the people had heard was, 'If you know any crazy people, call David.' So they were very polite, but nobody called because nobody wants to admit they're crazy or anybody else is crazy," Schuchman said. In fact, there are no words in the Somali language to describe the continuum of mental illness. Some Somalis refer to depression as "qulub." It's the same word that describes the sadness a female camel feels after she's lost her baby.

 

Over the years, Schuchman said he has learned to avoid focusing on diagnoses. Instead, he talks about symptoms. He'll ask his clients if they have problems sleeping, or if they feel anxious. Sometimes their mental anguish produces real, physical pain.

 

NEW COUNTRY, DIFFERENT RULES

 

Osman and the four men who live in the Somali group home know one another like brothers. They play chess, watch soccer, swap jokes and cigarettes. But it wasn't blood that brought them together. It was mental illness or substance abuse.

 

Osman said after he came to Minneapolis, he drank to wash away his memories and felt overwhelmed coming from a Muslim country, where alcohol wasn't tolerated, to an American youth culture where parties and booze were abundant.

 

Osman says his parents couldn't comprehend the choices he was making. They kicked him out of the house on a cold winter night, when he says they should have gotten him into treatment instead. Osman eventually dropped out of the 11th grade. Now he's going back to school to get his GED. But to this day, he says his father won't accept him because of his past indiscretions.

 

"He looks at me and says, 'You're a failure. You are 27, 28. You don't have a degree," said Osman. Osman said his father doesn't seem to believe that his mental-health struggles are real. His housemate, Mukhtar Hussein Abdi, described the pain his drinking and struggles with bipolar disorder caused his brothers and sisters.

 

"I come home drunk. I would start a fight with my brother for no reason." Abdi said. "My sisters would get involved, try to hold me, then I smash a chair. Then I smash the microwave. And there's no subject to fight for. It was just the alcohol and what it did."

 

Abdi said he started drinking about three years ago, when he was 21. But he says he just liked to party. "It was just for the love of it. I never had a rough time. I never went through torture, hunger, or anything, " Abdi said.

 

Abdi said he stole cars, got into fights and drove drunk. He racked up felonies. He said he finds wisdom and inspiration from hip-hop, but he knows the swagger he learned from Tupac and Snoop Dog have not been the best influence for a young man trying to find his way in a new land.

 

ANGER-MANAGEMENT FOR GIRLS

 

At Opportunity High School, where most of the students are Somali, Schuchman's intern, 28-year-old Deeqa Mohamed, a social work student at St. Catherine University, recently led an anger-management group.

 

The students in Deeqa Mohamed's classroom got into fistfights or acted up in other ways. All but one of the eight students were girls. "Let's just revisit what we talked about last week. Anger management. Is it working? Instead of getting mad, you can just take a breather and calm down rather than just fighting..." Deeqa Mohamed said. The teens nodded their heads. They've all been in the States for five years or less. One girl said it's tough staying calm when others pick on her.

 

Deeqa Mohamed told the class about her similar experiences when she came to Minnesota in 1991, when the Somali resettlement was just beginning. She remembers the American students at Roosevelt High School would mock her for her headscarf. Some would even try to rip off her hijab. Deeqa Mohamed felt conflicted between two worlds, and even felt like she needed to dress for both parts.

 

She left the house wearing traditional Somali clothing, but when she got to school, she'd rush into a restroom to change into her American-style clothes. When classes ended, she changed back into her hijab and long dress. "For a moment, I didn't even know who I was," she said

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Chimera   

2nd part:

 

SOMALI FAMILIES, UNPREPARED FOR THE DANGERS

 

When Somali-Americans talk about a crisis among their children, they usually mean their sons. After all, young men are the ones joining gangs and committing crimes. The success stories often belong to Somali girls who are staying out of trouble and graduating from college.

 

It's difficult to say if Somali women are truly faring better than men in America, according to Professor Cawo Abdi, who has researched the gender question within her community But Abdi, who teaches sociology at the University of Minnesota, says the patriarchal Somali culture may have inadvertently helped girls here in the long run.

 

"There was more scrutiny paid to girls -- because when boys and girls spend a lot of time outside of the house, it's the girl who can come back pregnant, not the boy," said Abdi. "So, what it meant was girls were staying close to home, they were doing their homework, and they were succeeding in high school, whereas some of the boys were not doing that." Somali families couldn't have forseen the dangers that lurked in the inner-city neighborhoods where many of them resettled, Abdi said

 

In Somalia, Abdi said, parents saw no harm in shooing their sons out of the house, because they knew other adults would be watching out for them. But that approach didn't work once parents moved their children to Minneapolis. The boys were sent outside, where drug dealers and gangs roamed the street corners.

 

Social worker Abdulahi Mohamed said many of the young Somali-American people he works with came to the States at a young age, and had problems adjusting. They dropped out of school, and either joined gangs or picked up drugs and alcohol.

"I feel like the youth are trying their best to fit in.They're trying to survive the way they know how to," Abdulahi Mohamed said. In the end, Abdulahi Mohamed said, they were rejected by both the American and Somali communities.

 

Abdulahi Mohamed , who was born in Somalia, said part of the problem is that when a family resettles in a new country, the roles of parents and children can reverse themselves. Somali parents learned once they arrived in America that they couldn't discipline their children by hitting them. One of their top parenting tools was now considered child abuse, Abdulahi Mohamed said.

 

Meanwhile, their kids picked up English with relative ease, and they became interpreters for their parents. "So parents became powerless. Children became powerful. And they took a dominant role that they never would back home," Abdulahi Mohamed said.

 

OVERCOMING THE MENTAL ILLNESS STIGMA

 

Safiya Mohamed is a single mom raising five kids in a sparse Minneapolis duplex. Her family embodies some of the biggest challenges for struggling Somali families in Minnesota: She feels like she has no control over her teen-age boys, she depressed and she worries that she's not capable of nurturing her youngest kids.

 

Safiya said she knows she's not well. "I'm sick. Coming to America, I'm very, very sick. I have the pressure. Kids have problems. I don't speak English nice," she said.

 

Safiya used to be a businesswoman in Somalia, running her own grocery. But when the war broke out, her life of comfort quickly slipped away. She lost her home, her business, her mother, and even her husband. He fled in a separate direction, and she only learned he was alive, and in Kenya, two years after she heard he was killed. She still talks to her husband on the phone every day, but she says she's been unable to bring him to the States because of immigration problems. Safiya knows his absence is taking a toll on her children.

 

"Their dad is not here, and that's the problem. Since I've been in this country, I haven't worked. I'm sick. They need a lot of things that I can't give them. They feel neglected," Safiya Mohamed said in Somali, with Abdulahi Mohamed translating.

 

But it's her three oldest children, all boys, who were giving her the most stress."Right now, I'm worried, because they don't have jobs, they can't go to school because they are over school age," she said. "They don't do anything here. And there are bad kids outside standing in the streets, and I'm worried that they may influence them. If my sons join that group, there's going to be trouble."

 

Safiya's youngest daughter, 12-year-old Hodan, never met her father. She said if her dad were around, he could help the family. "And he could make my brothers stop doing bad stuff," Hodan Ali said. Hodan said it's not easy seeing her mom when she's sick, like she was just a few days ago. "She was on the bed, sleeping most of the time," Hodan said.

 

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Chimera;720405 wrote:
As a person with a high level of creativity in multiple mediums, active in sports as well as a sociable person
, you wouldn't be able to tell if you saw me that I experience periods of depression that I can't explain, I never realised until I spoke with a sister(who is a doctor) that these were some of the classic sympthoms of a potential Bipolar disorder, and she eventually concluded that it was directly linked to the stress of following what's happening back home, which I have stopped doing since.

lol@adam

 

who would ever thought that you're creative?

 

its not biopolar disorder. its called hybrid identity. dont lose hope. it does have advantages like being able to culturally navigate between two or in your case 3 or more cultures. that so-called doctor is in clear breach of her duty of care to you.

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Chimera   

What does days of depression - after (for example) seeing a picture of a washed up body of a sister mauled by sharks, or reading about the daily scores of war-casualties and drownings - have to do with my identity? I let myself get sucked in, but not anymore. As for my creativity, you will see soon enough, though you won't know its me.

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Chimera

 

Depression is a real disease and happens to everyone at some point, good thing you're seeing someone about it.

 

My suggestion to you is don't get too bogged up by the world around you and just live your life.

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They should prevent these women from having children. What's the point they are at home, having 6 0r seven children. What's the future of these children. What chance they will have productive life with her. It is zero. She should control herself and not have so many sex. The whole think is a disgrace.

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Ibtisam   

Adam I also heard/read that there is a link between ADHD and creativity which is sometimes misdiagnosed as manic depression or bipolar because ADHD has similar symptoms. A very high percentage of diagnosed ADDers experience bouts of depression and/or anxiety, and a few have been diagnosed as ADD with manic depression.

 

A very high percentage of eminent writers, artists, inventors, explorers were considered either extremely moody, were manic depressive, or suffered from bouts of unipolar depression. I can name a number of such people.

 

 

FYI: the usual hierarchy of moodiness is something along the lines of :

- Normal mood variations, - Unusual mood cycles or ranges of moods, - Cyclothymia (Bipolar Type II), - Manic Depression (Bipolar Type I)

 

ADDers are somewhere between 2-3. You probably go through days of feeling down (although you can lift yourself or forget for a while), but also periods of high intensity involving lots of ideas, plans, midnight email sessions, and lack of sleep, followed by feeling drained, tiredness, and fatigue. as it would seem that these conditions contributed significantly to their talent, it is a process you have to find a way to break the cycle while at the same time maintaining your creativity.

 

I can recommend some reading for anyone interested.

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Chimera   

Ibti, you're a good sister, khayr allah ha ku siyo. The root issue was me following the conflict, over the years it desensitized me as a person without me noticing that it was also responsible for bringing me down periodically, which is the sole reason why I subconciously decided not to continue that ambitious (and money-draining) website project I mentioned to you years back, as much of the fun was zapped out of me, even threatening other related hobbies of mine. Now that I have blocked all of that out of my life, I'm doing well alhamdulilah.

 

I'm not the type of guy to discuss my personal life or issues on a forum, since I'm not interested in attention, or want to give away that kind of vibe. I just mentioned it to highlight the article regarding similar issues in our wider community.

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I think it happens to a lot of people. Impotent rage at the injustice and suffering in this world. I went through a phase like that too. It's akin to emotional burnout.

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Chimera   

Lol, as long as I'm breathing my ventures are very much alive as well. Your self-opinionated bile aside, your previous incarnation as "Queen Arawelo" continuesly leaves a smile on my face whenever I'm sad by remembering how you had cat-fights with most of the resident girls.

 

I should pay you lol.

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Aaliyyah   

As someone already mentioned dnt worry too much abt things thats happening around u ..n im not saying u shouldnt feel sympathy for the ppl who are suffering back home for instance and what not, but given that you cant do much abt it, the least u can do is dont let it affect your personal life and contribute back home whatever you can financially (perhaps that will take some of the burden you feel off u)...

 

As for those ppl who are being negative to you...let those comments slide.!

 

best of luck walaal..

 

salaam

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adam, you're text book material. stop indulging in theories. take the initiative and do something. like aliya said '' dnt worry too much abt things thats happening around u ..n im not saying u shouldnt feel sympathy for the ppl who are suffering back home for instance and what not, but given that you cant do much abt it, the least u can do is dont let it affect your personal life and contribute back home whatever you can financially''.

 

why are you worried about things which you have no personal connection with?

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Chimera   

Its best to end the discussion here, to much about me, nothing about the article I posted(aside from the London guy, who seems to be struggling with plenty of inner demons himself).

 

Aaliyah, mahadsanid!

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